Help with failed attempts

[erik_signe]

Hello, I've tried to CTB four times the past year and once just two months ago and miserably failed each time. My method was hanging. The first two times the knot was too loose and I ended up falling down. The third time I managed to make a better knot and was able to suspend but then I felt too scared and ended up loosening it in the end.

The most recent one, it was the nearest to success I had been. The knot was very tight and well made and I was suspended for longer and was about to lose consciousness when again. What I usually do is hang the knot using the grill of my bedroom window and holding onto those grills at the last second I believe is the primary reason why I could chicken out.

However, I don't know other places to hang myself where I won't be disturbed. I am planning my next attempt to be my last so I have been trying to take into consideration other factors that could help with its success.

Does anyone have any advice or tips for overcoming the fear of CTB? Should I take some kind of medication to help with it?

 

[ijbolijbol8979]

I heard some people take pills beforehand that like, relaxes them? I don't know much about it. Some people also smoke or drink alcohol as well

 

[ChainedCrow]

Like ijbolijbol8979 said above alcohol or any form of a drug will work but i would guess that anti anxiety pills like benzo will be your best bet. Like i said its only my guess if drugs dont make you more scared they will work just fine too
Much love

 

[FuneralCry]

I hope you find the relief you search for, I'm sorry you've had to suffer like that, it's so dreadful and cruel to me how trying to cease existing can go wrong and lead to even more suffering, I always suffer from how I cannot just have the option to cease existing peacefully that is guaranteed.