N

neonoirangel

New Member
Nov 28, 2023
1
I'm Neo, Noir, Neo Noir, Neonoir, or NN, however you'd like to address me. This is my first thread. I'm really jittery, I'd love to hear from you all.

Had my 18th birthday a few months ago. Parents told me that I'm on my own.
Found an SO to distract myself from reality with. Cheated on me once, twice, thrice, and now quarce today. Spilled my blood on the floor. They cleaned it up, just like yesterday. They threw away the knife.
This ain't the first time I've been cheated on. This isn't my first relationship. Funnily enough, all of them ended the same way; they all cheated on me.
I can't leave him. I'd end up dead on the cold pavement.
Can't go back to my parents. They hate me enough as it is.
Can't go back to my siblings. They hate me too.
There's no escape but the window. It crosses 3 floors and goes down to the ground. Wrist looks like it's got tiger stripes.
Even though I know that there's no afterlife, that when you die, it's just black, no end credits, no nothing. I still want to die. I want your help.
I'm determined now.
There's no way out of this. Can't think of the future if I don't have one. Can't think of the past if it's just a memory. Can't think of the present when I'm numbed by the pain, and it's not me numbing it instead.
Please kill me. Do your worst.
Thank you.
 
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