NSFW Hear me out!

[GhostInTheMachine]

The reason women choose the bear is because bears only attack for a few reasons and often times want nothing to do with people, thus avoiding the confrontation entirely. You can't say the same for men, even if it is a minority of them who commit such atrocities. The online reaction of men to seeing women choose the bear also gives creedence to the idea that men often just refuse to understand why women would even think a certain way, to the point of entirely diminishing their experiences.

I know a lot of women who inherently don't trust men, and a lot who do. I myself usually don't trust men either, but I'm well aware that most of them will never harm me. The problem comes in that I'm not going to play russian roulette with a bunch of "nice guys", and my trust of you is going to have to be built on a strong history of good experiences and transparency of character.

Men inherently will do more damage to others more than women could, that's why women usually have to rely on weapons, sneak attacks, and social disruption. Men also make up the lion's share of all crime, being the victimizer is the vast majority of cases, even though men and women are victimized at about the same rates. That means that other men need to think twice about who they trust as well, but thanks to male privilege, they have a higher chance of handling themselves better in such a situation.

Men and women will usually both lose to the bear, but women by and large will lose to the man. That's why men have a shocked pikachu face when a women chooses a potential mauling vs getting violated. They don't understand that their options are "maybe lose vs maybe win", while women have to choose between "maybe get killed vs maybe get raped".

 

[Dejected 55]

I have ZERO problems with demonizing men who have done horrible things. Even bashing men who are assholes is defensible.

I just have a problem demonizing all men by default because of what the bad ones do.

For what it's worth, a woman is just as apt to cover up for a man who assaults women as other men are. We see it all the time, whenever it comes out that someone is accused of rape, even if there is a lot of evidence both men and women line up to defend the rapist. These are women who would choose the bear, choosing to defend a very likely rapist because they know him. Explain that one.

A woman will choose the bear over a random man because she's scared he might be a rapist... but the same woman is just as likely to defend an accused rapist she knows personally even if the victim is a friend or relative of hers. You don't even have to look far for examples. Look at the women on this forum who have shared stories of rapes that they can't tell their family because their mother will not support them.

So, like I said... You can't punish a man who rapes someone enough for my money. But we waste time punishing men who haven't done anything and letting known rapist continue to rape... it seems so damn backwards to me. And even if it is men more likely to commit the rapes and assaults, it seems pretty evenly spread across men and women when it comes to the cover ups of the guilty to help them get away with it.

We as people tend to go after the easy things and not the hard ones. It's far easier to demonize all men than it is to focus on just the bad ones... and yet, if we focused on the bad ones, we might stand a real chance of making genuine positive change.

It's why things like the "metoo" movement never last. They stir things up for a bit, maybe some dude that nobody likes anyway gets thrown to the wolves as an example... meanwhile, some of the worst offenders keep on keeping on and people cover for them because they are "cool."

Not assault, but a place I worked years ago had a bad culture for women employees. They didn't tend to get advanced as much, no matter their performance on the job... and men in the office freely made comments. I had a supervisor during my annual review randomly start a conversation about a new female employee they had just hired and he was disappointed they didn't hire the candidate with the "biggest tits." His words, not mine.

Meanwhile, multiple women left that job while I was working there. I talked with one woman once, who flatly said she had left because of the misogyny and less options for women. I said I understood and didn't blame her. I told her the story about my boss that I wrote above to let her know I 100% was on her side and had seen it in the office too. She strangely replied that my boss was fun to be around. I was dumbstruck. A woman who just quit the place over misogyny and supported by an example of toxic behavior by men immediately switched sides to defend that dude.

I've seen this behavior too many times to count. And it's why so many men keep up with the bad behavior, because they not only get away with it but are often rewarded for it, and not just by other men.

So, the woman might say she chooses the bear over the man... or is scared of men... but watch her go defend a guy she knows if some other woman chooses a bear over that specific man. She'll choose the bear over random man, but will choose known bad man over everyone. It makes no sense.

 

[Forever Sleep]

Sorry not buying this. I have never been afraid some random man who approached me would kill me. LOLno woman I have ever know has feared this. This is over dramatization and lack of preparedness maybe(?) If you HONESTLY think a man will kill you why are around/dating them?? If you don't stop using that kind of ridiculous language. I can fully defend myself. Everybwomanshould be able to especially if their scared. Some men are monsters so are some women. Are you afraid every woman will kill you as well?
On a side not I do find it interesting that the same people who will swear men should be able to compete in women's sports because "there's no difference" are sooooo..... scared of men. Why??? If there's no difference??? Not saying you in particular just in general.

Firstly, that was a quote. I imagine the author made it to create dramatic effect. It's not to say every women is afraid of every man. It's more that in terms of statistics and potentials, men have the capacity and actually do physically harm women. It's not unreasonable that some will be afraid of them. Do you truly have no fear being out late at night for example?

It's also meant as a comparison I believe. Some men will complain how much women have negatively affected their lives (which can be true of course.) So, I imagine the author is showing another perspective to it. As in- in the very worst but, general terms, is it worse to feel hummiliated or, utterly terrified for your life? Would you prefer someone to laugh at your clothing or, try to rape you?

I'm neither around or dating men. I'm pretty reclusive. Not because I'm afraid of men. More that I don't like being around people generally. No, I don't believe every man I come across will kill me but statistically speaking, more men are physically violent towards women rather than vice versa.

I hope you are right- that you would be able to defend yourself. I hope you never have to put it to the test. Personally, I'm not the weakest woman. I'm not attractive either, so I doubt I'd be a good pick. I don't think I'd win against a strong man though.

I support trans people but I do actually have qualms about trans women/ men competing against cis women/ men in sports. We don't usually set cis men against women in sports because we recognise that our biological sex gives us advantages in certain areas. Men tend to do better in sports that rely on strength. They are more able to develop muscles. So- if the transition trans people go through still leave them with an unfair biological advantage of their previous gender, it's not fair to let them compete against a biologically weaker gender- in my view. That's not to say they shouldn't compete at all. Maybe they should have their own events. It must be very tricky in schools though. It's one of those difficult things where I feel bad for both sides.

 

[Skallagrim]

The man vs bear thing always felt like an exaggeration gone wrong. People see something on the Internet and think it means everyone believes it. It's like surveys. People lie on surveys all the time. They try and give answers they think they are supposed to give OR maybe the opposite of how they really feel because they don't believe it will really be anonymous.

It was an extremely misguided attempt, by someone foolish, to drum up some outrage.

The notion that women would rather meet a bear than a man was, objectively, an absurd take and the fact it caught on proved just how radicalized people have become.

If we took 100 women in a city in a control group, then had another 100 women wake up, go get on a train with 30-40 bears, with bears getting on and off, walk down a street full of bears, go into an office building that contained several hundred bears, spent a good chunk of the morning talking to some of the bears, went to a cafe where some of the bears were eating, went back to the office full of bears, then went home on a train packed with bears - the second group would all be dead in no time.

Few, if any, people are stupid enough to actually go for this nonsense.

But what the "man vs bear" thing did do was further entrench the division - men were (rightly) upset that they were being compared to animals, and (wrongly) lashed out. The more unhinged of the self-appointed male gurus (such as Tate) saw the opportunity for grift and leveraged it. The less honest of the feminist grifters (such as Taylor) saw this as an opportunity to further expand their support base and went all in on it.

The fact is that both men and women have problems and challenges of their own, and they don't need to add to each other's misery by blaming each other for their sorrows.

It's like I'm always saying to people - the culture war is meant to keep you from blaming the REAL architects of human misery.

We should be smarter, be kinder, be better, and resist attempts to make us hate one another.

 

[Forever Sleep]

It was an extremely misguided attempt, by someone foolish, to drum up some outrage.

The notion that women would rather meet a bear than a man was, objectively, an absurd take and the fact it caught on proved just how radicalized people have become.

If we took 100 women in a city in a control group, then had another 100 women wake up, go get on a train with 30-40 bears, with bears getting on and off, walk down a street full of bears, go into an office building that contained several hundred bears, spent a good chunk of the morning talking to some of the bears, went to a cafe where some of the bears were eating, went back to the office full of bears, then went home on a train packed with bears - the second group would all be dead in no time.

Few, if any, people are stupid enough to actually go for this nonsense.

But what the "man vs bear" thing did do was further entrench the division - men were (rightly) upset that they were being compared to animals, and (wrongly) lashed out. The more unhinged of the self-appointed male gurus (such as Tate) saw the opportunity for grift and leveraged it. The less honest of the feminist grifters (such as Taylor) saw this as an opportunity to further expand their support base and went all in on it.

The fact is that both men and women have problems and challenges of their own, and they don't need to add to each other's misery by blaming each other for their sorrows.

It's like I'm always saying to people - the culture war is meant to keep you from blaming the REAL architects of human misery.

We should be smarter, be kinder, be better, and resist attempts to make us hate one another.

That did make me smile- the thought of bear city. Bears everywhere.

I think the whole bear vs. man thing conjured up worse case scenarios really. Logically speaking though, bears live in forests. You'd expect to see them there. I imagine they would go for prey animals before attacking a human too. Of course, the man could well be a hiker but I imagine people jump to the worst case scenario so, then it becomes- would you prefer to be killed or, raped and then killed? (in the worst case scenario.) I imagine a bear would kill quickly too whereas, a sexually motivated killer may not.

As a counter example to you... Let's say there is a convey of prisoners who like to rape and torture men. Would you prefer to ride with them or, the bears? Neither is a fun choice. I suppose the reasoning is- you only have to die once. You could be raped and brutalized multiple times before being killed.

 

[Dejected 55]

Curiously too... the bear vs man example is posed as a hypothetical situation where a woman is walking in the woods and she encounters either a bear or a man and then asks which would she prefer?

Some of the logic around it is "why is the man there" to imply he must be up to something because why is a strange man in the woods... except... why is the woman there? Nobody ever asks that. The man and woman are equally out of place randomly in the woods, no? So why assume the woman is there for benign reasons but the man must not be.

Also... from the bear's perspective, men and women in the woods are intruding in the bear's environment. No reason the bear might not just see you as a threat regardless of your gender, I mean since you're in his home or at the least in his territory. From the bear's perspective, he (or she, why assume the bear is a man?) people don't belong in the woods and no bear ever encountered a human that meant kindness and friendship to the bear... so the bear has more reason to attack you on sight than the man does.

 

[Apathy79]

I find it hard to believe that bear vs man thing is any more than trolling.

My general take is:

A lot of men can't get laid (technically incel). A tiny fraction hate all women.
A lot of women identify as feminist. A tiny fraction hate all men.
A lot of people identify as Muslim. A tiny fraction hate all non-Muslims.
A lot of people identify as left or right wing. A tiny fraction hate all on the other side.
A lot of people identify as (pick any race). A tiny fraction hate everyone not that race.

I could go on forever with these. Anyone in the 2nd category of any of these is just as bad as the rest. The rationalisations are all garbage. The problem is always with the person holding the hateful viewpoint and not the group they hold it about. The irony of anyone in either of the first 2 groups getting angry about people in the other shouldn't be lost on anyone.

 

[alwaysalone]

A lot to unpack here. And also a lot of extremism. Are you a conservative by chance? Just curious because I notice they do that a lot. Not one person said EVERY MAN. No one even hinted towards that assumption. Not everything is extreme like that.

I am very much a woman who typically is never scared of anyone. I've been a fighter since a child and can hold my own. However - I also am not so egotistical to think that I can also win a fight against a man much bigger and stronger than me. It just not going to happen without using a weapon most likely. Now they'll feel me lol. They'll know I was there. But I'd lose in a lot of circumstances with a man. I'm never going to be so cocky to think I wouldn't. That's reality.

But yes - you're the only woman I've ever seen say that you have never thought that a man may hurt or kill you. Why do you think almost all women chose the bear?

Of course it isn't all men and with the exception of women who may have been through some seriously terrible trauma that left them with some serious mental Health issues - no one thinks that of all men.

But I promise the thought goes through our minds. Often when we actually ARE safe.

(And a total side note because you felt the need to add that - there is a vastly large difference between trans women and men. Trans women in women's sports is fine because hormone therapy changes their physical attributes that make men physically stronger etc. last I checked they never allow men in women's sports but they did allow trans women before the bigot took over the White House)

It's taken to the extreme because generalizations are thrown out constantly in these discussions. It's really pretty logical if you're that scared of men stay home. If you choose the bear there are a ton of enclosures. Prove it Go jump in. The point which flew right over your head is WORDS MATTER. If you mean SOME men say SOME men. Is it that hard??? I have 2 brothers a father and 2 sons. You better believe I'm sick to death of hearing generalizations from ignorant hypocritical women about men. Let me make this real simple. Men have feelings. I know that's shocking to people like you. Generalizations hurt their feelings. It's not ok to hurt mens feelings to justify women's feelings. Women are not better than men.

 

[deathbydesign]

It's taken to the extreme because generalizations are thrown out constantly in these discussions. It's really pretty logical if you're that scared of men stay home. If you choose the bear there are a ton of enclosures. Prove it Go jump in. The point which flew right over your head is WORDS MATTER. If you mean SOME men say SOME men. Is it that hard??? I have 2 brothers a father and 2 sons. You better believe I'm sick to death of hearing generalizations from ignorant hypocritical women about men. Let me make this real simple. Men have feelings. I know that's shocking to people like you. Generalizations hurt their feelings. It's not ok to hurt mens feelings to justify women's feelings. Women are not better than men.

See - you're still doing the same thing lol. You first of all said this in regards to a quote - but even that quote didn't say ALL men or ALL women. You choosing to be offended on behalf of men is virtuous and I'm sure they'll pick you now - but there hasn't been a single person on this entire thread that said anything about ALL or ANY - well except you. Multiple times. Especially when you said you don't know a single woman that is scared of men

Everything to the extreme, always. It's a common trait with conservatives though. It was how I knew immediately.

Scared also doesn't mean phobia to the point of a mental condition where we can't leave the house scared means we know there is a possibility of danger and aren't naive enough to think otherwise. It means we know to keep our guard up and be cautious. It means we won't blindly trust and hope that you aren't in fact one of the bad ones because we won't play Russian roulette.

But go off sis. Keep being offended over what you perceive as an insult to all because that gives you a reason to talk. Cause you have sons and brothers and a dad as if the same women speaking up don't also have those things.

 

[Unbearable Mr. Bear]

All that talk of bears has got me excited! Where is this bear city? Imagine the amount of mama bears in there!