Discussion Have you seen someone who was once "successful" ruined by drugs?

[ericwilkinson]

I'm pro-legalization but I realize that drugs can devastate someone financially/emotionally/mentally and even those around them if not used carefully.

Do you have any stories?

 

[not_a_robot]

Many users are here because drugs ruined their lives and they post about it often.

I have used 1 gram of weed a day for 22 years. Tried other drugs but never loved them enough to use more than once or twice a year. My life is ruined but not by weed, it's the only thing that saved me.
But I am atypical because I'm autistic. Neurotypicals generally can't handle their dope and are likely to slip into serious addiction like you see in commercials and horror stories. For them, drugs really are as deadly as everyone says.
And different ones affect ppl differently. I say legalize it all and let the dead fall where they may, but I'm a nihilist and a Scorpio, so obviously, I would say that.

But weed is legal now and that's all I care about.

 

[Severen]

No. Everyone I've seen who had a life that was destroyed by illegal drugs, were dealt a shitty hand of cards to play with since they day they were born. Their father abandoned them at a young age etc... They never really had a bright future, to look forward to...

 

[cornflowerblue]

Yes but it was a friend so I don't feel like that's my story to share. Even if they'd never see it, I'd feel like I'm violating their privacy.

 

[been_there]

No. Do yoiu?

 

[Final Escape]

No. Everyone I've seen who had a life that was destroyed by illegal drugs, were dealt a shitty hand of cards to play with since they day they were born. Their father abandoned them at a young age etc... They never really had a bright future, to look forward to...

Not having a strong responsible male figure as head of the home really puts kids at risk for all kinds of bad shit. Also because the man's income matters big time usually, can leave the family impoverished. We were on welfare growing up but it just wasn't enough. I recall being hungry a lot, just neglected in general. I know not all single moms are terrible and situations can vary but my mother just wasn't able to meet our needs very well by herself. Plus she happened to be mentally ill. I consider malignant narcissism a mental illness because they are unaware how they destroy those around them. It's the victims of narcissists that end up seeking psych help not the abuser.

 

[ericwilkinson]

Not having a strong responsible male figure as head of the home really puts kids at risk for all kinds of bad shit. Also because the man's income matters big time usually, can leave the family impoverished. We were on welfare growing up but it just wasn't enough. I recall being hungry a lot, just neglected in general. I know not all single moms are terrible and situations can vary but my mother just wasn't able to meet our needs very well by herself. Plus she happened to be mentally ill. I consider malignant narcissism a mental illness because they are unaware how they destroy those around them. It's the victims of narcissists that end up seeking psych help not the abuser.

Why exactly is a father figure important?

 

[Severen]

Not having a strong responsible male figure as head of the home really puts kids at risk for all kinds of bad shit. Also because the man's income matters big time usually, can leave the family impoverished. We were on welfare growing up but it just wasn't enough. I recall being hungry a lot, just neglected in general. I know not all single moms are terrible and situations can vary but my mother just wasn't able to meet our needs very well by herself. Plus she happened to be mentally ill. I consider malignant narcissism a mental illness because they are unaware how they destroy those around them. It's the victims of narcissists that end up seeking psych help not the abuser.

I agree 100%. You are wise beyond your years. I know you aren't saying single moms are terrible. It's just raising a kid or two or three is a job for two people. It's too much work for one person. One of the guys I grew up with in Middle School and High School, ODed a year or two ago from heroine. He was from a single mother family. He was doomed since the day he was born... And also, not having a father around to teach him discipline also fucked him up in the head. So it's not just a lack of money and connections.

 

[cornflowerblue]

Why exactly is a father figure important?

Because some people think that certain things can only be done by men (income, discipline, etc) or are done better by men than by women.

 

[Severen]

Because some people think that certain things can only be done by men (income, discipline, etc) or are done better by men than by women.

Nah, two people making money = more money = better life = more opportunities in the future. And a big intimidating father is better suited for disciplining a 16 year old or 17 year old male teen unless the mother takes a lot of steroids. Team work gets more shit down than going solo.

 

[cornflowerblue]

Nah, two people making money = more money = better life = more opportunities in the future. And a big intimidating father is better suited for disciplining a 16 year old or 17 year old male teen unless the mother takes a lot of steroids. Team work gets more shit down than going solo.

There's a difference between importance of two parents vs importance of a male specifically, so I took that question as "why does it matter if the single parent is male or female". I've also met plenty of women who are more physically and emotionally intimidating than the average male.

Parenting/discipline by intimidation isn't really that great anyway because that just teaches the kids to lie and hide things, and to depend on others for determining how to act, rather than developing their own sense of morals, critical thinking, and capacity for emotional regulation. That's beside the point though, I was just responding to the specific wording of "father figure" vs focusing on the need for a two-parent household regardless of gender.

 

[inconsequential]

Oh, man. My life was over long before the drugs, and now, after them, it is still over. Now I just smoke weed. Which is technically a prescription.

 

[Severen]

There's a difference between importance of two parents vs importance of a male specifically, so I took that question as "why does it matter if the single parent is male or female". I've also met plenty of women who are more physically and emotionally intimidating than the average male.

Parenting/discipline by intimidation isn't really that great anyway because that just teaches the kids to lie and hide things, and to depend on others for determining how to act, rather than developing their own sense of morals, critical thinking, and capacity for emotional regulation. That's beside the point though, I was just responding to the specific wording of "father figure" vs focusing on the need for a two-parent household regardless of gender.

Good point when it comes to intimidation. That kind of upbringing just taught me how to become like a ninja. But two people still = more resources. Man + man couple, woman + woman couple, man + woman couple. Still more resources. Yes, there are plenty of women more physically and emotionally intimidating than the average male. But there are also teenage sons who are much stronger than their mothers and who are also extremely violent. And then the mother has two options... Leave him alone or pull out a knife or something like that. LOL But a lot of mothers don't want to resort to such extreme measures to control their teenage sons...

 

[not_a_robot]

Not having a strong responsible male figure as head of the home really puts kids at risk for all kinds of bad shit. Also because the man's income matters big time usually, can leave the family impoverished. We were on welfare growing up but it just wasn't enough. I recall being hungry a lot, just neglected in general. I know not all single moms are terrible and situations can vary but my mother just wasn't able to meet our needs very well by herself. Plus she happened to be mentally ill. I consider malignant narcissism a mental illness because they are unaware how they destroy those around them. It's the victims of narcissists that end up seeking psych help not the abuser.

I miss you already.

Oh, man. My life was over long before the drugs, and now, after them, it is still over. Now I just smoke weed. Which is technically a prescription.

It's called "California sober" lol

 

[Kyrok]

Drugs don't ruin people's lives. Addiction to illegal drugs can and often does. But, "addiction" (disordered use/abuse) generally doesn't happen except when someone is already not doing well in life (socially, professionally, psychologically).

There are casual cocaine users, for example. The drug all on its own doesn't cause the problem. It is the person seeking to fill a void through the high that is at the core of addiction.

Legalization will increase use, but if the drugs are removed from their black-market context, much of the life-destroying consequences would diminish.

Add to this, imagine if rather than the hundreds of billions spent annually on jailing drug criminals, that money was used to prevent and treat abuse.

Eventually, we will get there. Other countries (e.g. Portugal) has already seen the light.

 

[ericwilkinson]

Drugs don't ruin people's lives. Addiction to illegal drugs can and often does. But, "addiction" (disordered use/abuse) generally doesn't happen except when someone is already not doing well in life (socially, professionally, psychologically).

There are casual cocaine users, for example. The drug all on its own doesn't cause the problem. It is the person seeking to fill a void through the high that is at the core of addiction.

Legalization will increase use, but if the drugs are removed from their black-market context, much of the life-destroying consequences would diminish.

Add to this, imagine if rather than the hundreds of billions spent annually on jailing drug criminals, that money was used to prevent and treat abuse.

Eventually, we will get there. Other countries (e.g. Portugal) has already seen the light.

I agree but why is this so difficult for many anti-drug people to accept?

Christ, the drug propaganda by the government is so incredibly effective its unbelievable. Politicians are ashamed that they can't get the public to believe their propaganda like drug propaganda.

 

[kkatt]

My entire adult life has been lived within the drug using community. Those who find it immoral and impossible to understand, live in a way I find equally as alien.
A common misconception is that only the uneducated and those with troubled backgrounds, fall prey to addiction. Addiction has no prejudice.
I know teachers, nurses, IT professionals, advertising executives and so many more people deeply involved with use of illegal drugs. Sometimes the habit overwhelms them and they can lose everything. Often they manage to maintain the outward appearance of a regular life.
The one thing that seems to do most damage to a user is simply the illegality.
It's absolutely true that a good proportion are in fact, self medicating.
In many ways, I wish that I'd never become involved in this world. But it's also taught me valuable lessons and led to experiences I would otherwise never have dreamt of.
After all this time I have nothing to show for it. But I had nothing in the beginning either. Like most people in such a situation, I've done things of which I'm ashamed, yet I've never stolen from anybody, hurt anyone and (the thing that seems to make a huge difference) I still have my family's support.

 

[Soul]

"Drugs don't ruin lives - lives ruin lives."
We could print bumper stickers.

 

[lostangel]

Well I have two stories one is about my cousin who is 26 now but got hooked on drugs 5 years back. It messed her college degree up and messed her life up. She almost died by a drug debt but somehow survived I was never told directly by anybody in my family they all kept it away from me. I overheard bits and put the pieces together. She wasn't ''successful'' like in terms of being famous but she could of had a better future.

Another story is of a famous person called mac miller. He died on sept 7 2018. By accidental drug overdose. He has been open in the past about the drugs and says how it had taken over his life in many interviews. I did get emotional when I found out he died as I was a big fan of him but I guess that's what happens when you're under that much pressure.

 

[ericwilkinson]

Well I have two stories one is about my cousin who is 26 now but got hooked on drugs 5 years back. It messed her college degree up and messed her life up. She almost died by a drug debt but somehow survived I was never told directly by anybody in my family they all kept it away from me. I overheard bits and put the pieces together. She wasn't ''successful'' like in terms of being famous but she could of had a better future.

Another story is of a famous person called mac miller. He died on sept 7 2018. By accidental drug overdose. He has been open in the past about the drugs and says how it had taken over his life in many interviews. I did get emotional when I found out he died as I was a big fan of him but I guess that's what happens when you're under that much pressure.

Would you mind elaborating what drugs she took

 

[Dartz]

Addiction to anything can cripple a person, alcohol and prescription drugs can be equally destructive as any illicit substance.

 

[lostangel]

Would you mind elaborating what drugs she took

As I was kept out of it I did not know all the details but I did hear she had pills which could be anything but im not too sure.

 

[azucaramargo]

Well I have two stories one is about my cousin who is 26 now but got hooked on drugs 5 years back. It messed her college degree up and messed her life up. She almost died by a drug debt but somehow survived I was never told directly by anybody in my family they all kept it away from me. I overheard bits and put the pieces together. She wasn't ''successful'' like in terms of being famous but she could of had a better future.

Another story is of a famous person called mac miller. He died on sept 7 2018. By accidental drug overdose. He has been open in the past about the drugs and says how it had taken over his life in many interviews. I did get emotional when I found out he died as I was a big fan of him but I guess that's what happens when you're under that much pressure.

I am sorry about your cousin's muted prospects, and in a way, I find it touching that your family tried to shield you from her struggles. I'm very glad your cousin survived. RE: Mac Miller, even though I am old enough to have been his mother, I am just getting into his music in the wake of his death. Pretty talented. On the 1-year anniversary of his death, his family/fans planned a memorial at that park in Pittsburgh where he filmed many of his videos. I halfway thought about going, but a) I thought my age would embarrass me and b) I went to go visit an SS'er instead.

Did you see the video for "Best Day Ever"? At the beginning there's footage of little 4-year-old Mac singing the Sugarhill Gang's "Rapper's Delight". It was adorable and tragic, and for me, kind of envy-inducing. Clearly he'd shown an affinity for rap since he was a tot, and lo, he grew up to make records, but yet died young. I like all the affection within his family. That tugs at the heartstings.

Man, Arianna Grande has gotten her paws on some quality talent! Pete Davidson, Mac... But, I digress...

Drugs don't ruin people's lives. Addiction to illegal drugs can and often does. But, "addiction" (disordered use/abuse) generally doesn't happen except when someone is already not doing well in life (socially, professionally, psychologically).

There are casual cocaine users, for example. The drug all on its own doesn't cause the problem. It is the person seeking to fill a void through the high that is at the core of addiction.

Legalization will increase use, but if the drugs are removed from their black-market context, much of the life-destroying consequences would diminish.

Add to this, imagine if rather than the hundreds of billions spent annually on jailing drug criminals, that money was used to prevent and treat abuse.

Eventually, we will get there. Other countries (e.g. Portugal) has already seen the light.

Really? What did Portugal do?

 

[mathieu]

No, not really. I have been able to use a variety of drugs and not get hooked. I have been physically dependent on medications but that's not really the same as addiction. You never know what the future holds though... Basically I have very little money so can only afford to do drugs every now and then, couldn't afford every day.