I've thought about it, and continue to challenge my thinking on the broad topic.
physical sensation in moments of dying? honestly, that one doesn't really trouble me. I can't say I can predict every outcome, but I'd think it's somewhat dependent on whether or not one is aware death is what's imminent, and if death was one's goal or not. I'd think the physical sensation aspect and the thought/feeling process would play into each other and of course be highly unique to individual experiences.
the aftermath, in terms of affect on people still living? people will deal with/process death and grieve in their own unique ways. as much as I'd love everyone to intimately and completely understand my level of comfort and take solace in that, that's not realistic to happen. people might respect whatever (if anything) one might want done with their remains/with regard to services, and they might choose not to respect one's wishes if they were aware of them. when I contemplate affected others, unfortunate as it may be, how they might think about and process things is not something I feel I can sway.
the aftermath, on my remains? I know what I would and wouldn't want done. ultimately, it's just flesh we decorate while we're living in.
the aftermath, mentally/philosophically, 'what's next?'? that one stumps me and keeps me guessing. I do adhere to a belief system, but there is always discussion with regard to the existence of an afterlife and what, if anything, that might entail. personally, the knowledge that I won't know until it happens, if I have any awareness at all, is comforting. the thought of reincarnation isn't exactly an idea I love - but then, there's suggestion that past life information is generally, relatively inaccessible. even if one were to be reincarnated into another human life, not 5 minutes post mortem, with no knowledge of just having died, to exist in yet another less than enjoyable situation, one still would not be conscious of past suffering, as that theory goes, unless copious amounts of effort were put in to learn about past lives. and even then, one rarely would be able to recount exactly the way that life was experienced. and then I dwell equally on the notion of oblivion/nothing/a numb unconscious void, which frankly often seems the most plausible to me, and might even be able to coexist with the reincarnation theories as one's experience in this, their current body, would become a virtually inaccessible set of memories.
the world and the people I know/knew going forward, detached from the grief aspect? that's another I return to to consider. how many generations before everyone I knew, and everyone who had been told about my life, are gone as well? people so often talk about their departed friends and family etc., about that person's memory being the last living aspect of their life, and to an extent I can understand, but that's only continuing my existence in someone else's mind, likely misinterpreted in at least one aspect to some degree. it's whatever narrative people carry on about the dead person that becomes temporarily preserved in memory - inaccuracies, I would think, are likely.
so, yes, I think about the topic in trying to create sub-topics to ponder.
in my thinking, the running theme is that.. there is no running theme. individuality is a primary factor in this inconsistency.
