Discussion Have you ever thought of people’s problems as insignificant?

[struggles_inc]

I'm sorry to be so invalidating, but I must ask.

Have you ever been in a position when someone vented to you and you couldn't help but think their complaints are so small and unimportant?

Like, for example, a friend was upset about not getting a new iPad while you attempted to CTB the other day because your life sucks in general.

I try to be supportive in this situation, but I'm completely confused on the inside.

 

[Jiyuurakka]

You know, when you see someone CTB'ing for not getting an IPad while you're at your wit's end trying to maintain your sanity while going through a normal day, you can't help but gape your mouth, and feel just a tiny bit of surprise and loathing.

 

[Despondent_Fondant]

I try not to do this whenever possible. Sometimes that feeling will creep in mid-conversation but try to ignore it as best you can. While it is true that some problems cosmically are harder and more difficult to deal with (like ctb) it's impossible to tell how significant something will be to someone personally. A friend of mine cry's whenever they are yelled at (even when justified) and while that is a small problem, and one that is way less pressing than inevitable suicided, it's just not usefull or productive to let that feeling ever dictate the conversation ( in my experience ).

 

[divinemistress36]

I can't handle people with their little problems anymore I've grown insensitive to them and just ignore as mean as it sounds

 

[struggles_inc]

I can't handle people with their little problems anymore I've grown insensitive to them and just ignore as mean as it sounds

I feel that on many levels lately. I used to be really empathetic but I've developed a colder side. It's more and more often that I don't even try to be nice and careful with feelings of others.

 

[divinemistress36]

I feel that on many levels lately. I used to be really empathetic but I've developed a colder side. It's more and more recent that I don't even try to be nice and careful with feelings of others.

I heard a saying the other day "Nurture yourself is to nuture others"

 

[Forveleth]

I don't think of people's problems as insignificant but rather their perspective on them. I don't mind people complaining about the little things as long as they treat them like little things. From your example, I wouldn't mind my friend complaining about not getting an iPad so long as they weren't acting like it ruined their life.

Also if they didn't know what was going on in my life, like if I'm super depressed or suicidal, they don't know that them complaining about an iPad might not really register with me. So I try to keep things like that in mind.

I do sometimes get fatigue trying to care for people but I think that's different than thinking their problems are insignificant.

Edit for clarification