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pogostick

pogostick

Student
Jul 29, 2025
101
Hopefully nobody is sick of my account showing up on their recent feed.

I saw a video recently talking about the strange feeling of having to walk home after experiencing something traumatic, and I realised that that was something I experienced when I failed my attempt to CTB on October 1st. I went home in the dark and it was cold and wet and nobody knew what I'd done. I took a day off of uni and said that something 'really serious' had happened.

I was just wondering if anybody else has had to do this, and what it felt like.
 
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BrainSplatter

BrainSplatter

Member
Oct 31, 2025
31
I felt kinda empty and numb after failing I feel like that's kinda natural after a near death experience like you body would have had so much adrenaline giving you that intense rush, you're left drained both physically and emotionally - I wouldn't want to be at uni in that state. I remember this attempt I had where I tried to jump off a multistory car park it took 6 cops to get me down to safety I was so hysteric punching kicking them pushing the over doing anything to get back over to that edge then I was sectioned for 3 days then discharged that same day I went to meet with my friends at the time and smoke weed like always anyway as conversations started about what people did over the weekend my one friend said did you see that guy on that car park the Friday night there was 2 police cars ambulance it was crazy then someone asked what happened did they die? She said yes but I knew the truth, it was me who attempted and I didn't jump so why say yes? Maybe she was stoned maybe she wanted peoples reaction but no one seemed too bothered by it like the initial shock died down pretty quick but it was strange how life just kept going while I was still stuck in that moment
 
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