Have you ever fallen in love? If yes, what was your experience like?

[EyeBeyond]

would you fall in love again, but with another person?

 

[dinosavr]

I'm in my twenties and I've never been in love. I wonder if that would change anything about my perspective on life.

 

[mortuarymary]

Heartbreaking and amazing

 

[sadwriter]

In my mid 20s and I've been in 3 relationships total but never been in love :,) Part of me wants to experience it, but it also sounds absolutely terrifying and destabilizing as hell...

 

[Suicidebydeath]

It's nice. I can feel like it physically like inside my chest or behind my face.

I'm unfortunately unable to feel most things that are nice, like happiness, due to going through too much in life, but love is probably the exception.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

I don't know if I can call what I've felt before true love since I never got into a relationship with anyone. There have been 4-5 major obsession targets, to use a more apt term.

The first was a girl who moved into my school in fifth grade. She was so brilliant she was a year ahead in school. This was around the time my parents had gotten divorced and I was afraid of being alone like my shit father so I may have latched onto her for this exact reason. I became more infatuated with her when she helped me study and I actually got a non failing grade in tests for subjects I usually always hated. I stayed in love with her for the next nine years. Even when in high school all she did was ignore me I still felt she was the only one out there for me.

What got me over her was falling in love with a fictional character. Marrying Lucina from Fire Emblem Awakening was the only way for me to move on and I firmly believe that if it weren't for her I'd still be into the first girl. Unfortunately as many have told me, she's not real. I wish I had ignored them though because now I can't go back.

When I was around 20-21 I got a job at a fast food restaurant. There a girl actually approached me for the first time asking for my number and everything. A week later, she bailed saying she wasn't sure of herself because she was going through a recent breakup that was really harsh. I said no worries, and that I would be willing to just be friends. I didn't explicitly tell I her I was developing feelings for her already. What a fool I was. By the time I was finally ready she had already moved on to someone else and me in my infinite foolishness, decided to continue being friends with her. I later told her while drunk at a bar that I actually liked her and she said she was sorry because if I had just told her sooner then she would have accepted me first over him. How crazy is that? Eventually I had to cut her off because I realized my soul had become broken to the point of no return and that even if she did one day decide to leave him for me, then she'd be choosing the inferior option so I had to intentionally piss her off to make her never want to see me again. This girl also made me promise not to kill myself so I kept that promise until the next one I met…

In 2020, when I was 26 years old, a woman from this very website reached out to me saying she saw all my posts about being an incel and that she was willing to help remedy that. As it turned out, she also happened to live only about a 20 minute drive from me. Unfortunately this was in California during peak lockdown measures. After a few days of exchanging messages and me spilling my soul to reveal more vulnerability than I had ever shown anyone, she decided to cut me off…because she felt like I could never be convinced not to have kids (which would have been impossible with her due to her hysterectomy). She was probably right but at the time I thought we could at least meet up once. Nope. She felt I would just get too attached because I have an INFP personality. She was probably right about that.

Cut to today. A couple weeks ago I started getting feelings for a new girl at my current job. I kept telling myself I didn't want this to happen but I think my urges are starting to get uncontrollable. I really thought she was interested in me though maybe my disgusting male ego misinterpreted her being nice to me. I managed to even get her contact information which she willingly gave me. I've never done anything like this before and honestly I wish I hadn't. I don't know if she did like me but I fucked up somehow or maybe I am just extremely delusional but lately she's been kind of distant and she still hasn't responded to the last message I sent her and even at work all she can do is say hi and then move along despondently. Every moment I'm not around her my heartbeat gets so loud I just want it to stop. Every moment I am around her, my brain gets turned into a pile of sludge that also makes me want to kill my self for daring to burden her. I hate it.

I feel like such an idiot. A creep. A disgusting savage. All of these women's lives would have been better without me in it to make them uncomfortable. I feel sorry for any woman out there who ever has the misfortunate of being the target of infatuation from someone like me. I don't know if this is what love is but if it is, then I don't want it anymore. I don't want to feel love I'd rather feel nothing. At the same time I want it more than anything. I want a proper outlet to express these emotions to and describing someone like that is exactly why I don't deserve it but I don't care. It's sickening and that's why I need to CTB for the good of all people so that they don't have to be victims of my terribleness.

 

[silent.desperation]

It can be breathtakingly beautiful and soul destroying all at once.

 

[leavingthesoultrap]

3 times.
My first love was a very pure young teenage kind of love. Just kissing and hanging out.
My second love was like finding a soul mate. I am still on friendly terms with that guy.
But the third time was traumatic unfortunately. I am not sure if I ever want to date again after that

 

[TheSpookyNameGuy]

I don't personally understand it, but whenever i deeply enjoy someone's company i often wish i could own them like you own a chair or other such object on display.

I cant describe it any other way, nothing nefarious of course, ive experienced kissing and cuddling but its strange for me, who the fuck knows lol

 

[Myforevercharlie]

Being in love and being loved back is amazing.

Heartbreak as the word says can break your heart, in some cases a mind

But to love again, personally it's I risk I'm willing to take

 

[EyeBeyond]

Being in love and being loved back is amazing.

Heartbreak as the word says can break your heart, in some cases a mind

But to love again, personally it's I risk I'm willing to take

Some people only love someone who doesnt share the same feeling for them, sometimes I find myself in this same situation and when the person I love, she starts having the same feeling for me then somewhat Im not interested anymore in this person

 

[migimortis]

Never been in love.

 

[Nori]

I would. I've loved a lot of people, out of all of my girlfriends and partners though I think I have only been in love with 2 of them. Both of them I felt really warm but I think I got too comfortable and my bad thoughts got too loud. I still talk to one but that is because we were kids. The other one I was with for 5 years and is my most recent. It's been 2 years and I long for the feeling of being helplessly in love with someone. It's awkward meeting people though. I can't keep up with talking to people on dating apps so most people I stop answering- I'm not good at juggling like that. I don't know if I'd find them there anyway. Its kind of hard to meet people when you're 25 I guess. Even in New York City LOL!

 

[cryone]

a lot. it feels amazing in the moment..but its the worst thing ever. sucks cause magically we stop having the spark and im the only one left with feelings. i wish I could stop.

 

[FujoshiNeet]

When I was 25 I had a girlfriend. She was funny, exceptionally beautiful, and understood me more than most. It was amazing, euphoric, until I realized she did not love me back and nothing I could do would change that.
I haven't dated since and I still dream often about her.

 

[migimortis]

When I was 25 I had a girlfriend. She was funny, exceptionally beautiful, and understood me more than most. It was amazing, euphoric, until I realized she did not love me back and nothing I could do would change that.
I haven't dated since and I still dream often about her.

You were dating but while you were dating you realized she didn't love you? If so. Brutal.

 

[omegas82128]

Unrequited love has been a nightmare. But requited was much worse LMAO.

First requited instance was in my teens, so it was doomed cause of teenage stupidity.

Second one is much more painful. I had feelings for a friend and I thought she had none, so I never even dared to tell her.

Eventually she became trapped in the proposition of an arranged marriage. I didn't say anything even then, cause it felt pointless to make things worse and have her lose a good friend too.

Earlier this month, I decided to ctb towards the end of the month and I finally confessed to her. Cause her wishing you me new years felt like there was something there.

Turns out she did have feelings for me. And that she could have given it a try, if I'd said something sooner.

She wasn't engaged at that point. But she is now. Things were in motion and her opinion didn't matter much. Also she didn't want to disappoint her mother, especially cause she'd lost her father last year.

The only thing I didn't give a fair shot to was love. So I'd have given it a try. But I'm more than okay with dying without it.

If I don't die this time, I'll give life another chance. Might pursue romance then, if I do. Not dying seems unlikely, but let's see

 

[FujoshiNeet]

You were dating but while you were dating you realized she didn't love you? If so. Brutal.

Yup. I told this girl my deepest secrets and it turned out I was just a rebound. I was incredibly angry at her for forcing a relationship on me when I would have been grateful just being her friend.

 

[migimortis]

Yup. I told this girl my deepest secrets and it turned out I was just a rebound. I was incredibly angry at her for forcing a relationship on me when I would have been grateful just being her friend.

Brutal. Sorry to hear that man.

 

[yourelosingme]

I don't think I'm capable of falling in love, I can force myself to think I love somebody but there will never be a true connection for me I think

 

[boblong]

What's love? Me ignorant.

 

[TheShadowKing]

10/10 would fall in love again (Hopefully I can Keep them this time)

 

[SexyIncél]

Yes. When the love-relation's secured, I enter a daze. To the extent they're actually decent (i.e. I didn't push myself to believe false illusions about their virtues):

• conversations with them hyper-motivate me to push my limits in all realms
• physical touch remains both intense & casual
• group-mind lasts many hours

Unwise to force that feeling of "in love". Unless you wanna become a blasted shell of yourself & ruin the simple pleasure of each kiss

It's ok if she's just a normie, or hoe, or something. Feel appropriately

 

[UsagiDrop]

Falling in love is probably one of the worst best things to happen to me. I'm now forced to live, I have an obligation to think about others. I'm more willing to accept my partner's shitty traits. I was more vulnerable to their whims and desires. Every day our lives become more and more intertwined and it gets harder and harder to leave. I feel trapped. And used. And sometimes, even dirty.

At first it feels great. It's like finding the jackpot in someone. It's like you'll never need anything else again. But I hardly remember the good parts after all of the stuff they've put me through and continue to put me through by now and I want to leave or die, but I can't do either of those things for a very long time. Especially today, it's just not the whole butterflies-in-the-stomach experience. I look around and see a lot of people who may be better suited for me, who wouldn't put me in the position I'm in right now, but the love I have for the person I'm with makes me stay even on the days I don't like them. Even on the days I fucking hate them.

Would I do it again? Maybe, with someone different, now that I know something different. But ideally, if I could even handle being on my own in the first place, I would probably avoid this like the plague. The horrible part is that I can't control when those feelings come and go. I may just spend the rest of what's left of my life with the person I'm with. I want to, I just wish things were better and I wish I didn't regret giving this a chance.

 

[F@#$]

It was cool until it wasn't, and then it was misery. Every fuckin time. Love is a lie.