Discussion have you ever ctb only wanting to go to hospital? if so, what method??

[evoker]

as someone with bpd, im always told my underlying feelings arent just to ctb but to end up hospitalised for attention,,, and it got me thinking about this kind of stuff. I personally dont think its a negative type of attention seeking, wanting to be cared for; I go through a weird cycle myself of sometimes wanting to ctb and sometimes wanting people to realise the extent of how im feeling. People can want to go to hospital for many reasons tbf !! I was just wondering, if you have done it with that intent, was it a gamble? or did you know for sure it wouldnt? were you actually suicidal or did you just want to feel cared about? might be a stupid question, sorry, but. (im in the uk btw so it doesnt cost, if that means anything)

EDIT: a lot of people are thinking that im saying this is what i want. i dont mean that sorry! i myself dont want to get hospitalised right now (considering i have a few times and its just a drag lol), im just wondering how it is for other people feeling this way, or who've gone through simmilar experiences to mee lmaoo

 

[ctbcat]

i have done it with that intent, but it didn't work lol

i od'ed on cocodamol & paracetmol, wanting to get hospitalised. it's not like it didn't do anything - i took a lot. i projectile vomited, n stuff. it just... my parents chalked it up to a bug. had to continue on the day after pretending nothing happened. i probably should've been hospitalised, i don't know if my immune system got compromised by that. would consider myself generally healthy physical wise, but i dunno.

i did it cuz i wanted to get out of something / avoid something, not die, though i was going down a downward spiral by then that yrs later i have NOT managed to get out of lol

 

[sash]

Hi.
As I was reading I was wondering if u were in the uk. Yep. I am too.
If u weren't, u wouldnt b thinkin this.
Can u not self admit to mental care. I had a friend used to go when she felt she really needed. She'd 'check in ' as she called it cos she was a danger to herself & saw the signs herself when she was on one.
Or do u want to go into a , normal hospital where ppl cant get beds?
Maybe mental health would be better, tell em ur going to do something. Maybe fone samaritans or any helpline, ask advice where to go so u dont hurt yrself right now, then contact/ go there & get the care u want. Or play roulette & maybe not make it to hosp or worse, permanent damage?

 

[evoker]

Hi.
As I was reading I was wondering if u were in the uk. Yep. I am too.
If u weren't, u wouldnt b thinkin this.
Can u not self admit to mental care. I had a friend used to go when she felt she really needed. She'd 'check in ' as she called it cos she was a danger to herself & saw the signs herself when she was on one.
Or do u want to go into a , normal hospital where ppl cant get beds?
Maybe mental health would be better, tell em ur going to do something. Maybe fone samaritans or any helpline, ask advice where to go so u dont hurt yrself right now, then contact/ go there & get the care u want. Or play roulette & maybe not make it to hosp or worse, permanent damage?

ahh thankyou !! ur lovely, im really thankful for the variety you gave me <3

i have done it with that intent, but it didn't work lol

i od'ed on cocodamol & paracetmol, wanting to get hospitalised. it's not like it didn't do anything - i took a lot. i projectile vomited, n stuff. it just... my parents chalked it up to a bug. had to continue on the day after pretending nothing happened. i probably should've been hospitalised, i don't know if my immune system got compromised by that. would consider myself generally healthy physical wise, but i dunno.

i did it cuz i wanted to get out of something / avoid something, not die, though i was going down a downward spiral by then that yrs later i have NOT managed to get out of lol

THISS. i can understand you sm, something simmilar started my spiral i cant lie, and i feel you sm. paracetamol too istggg such a bitch, the vomiting and stuff is mad lol i feel for youu i hope you're doing okay !!

 

[tsumihoroboshi]

no, i've never done it for attention, however on one of my attempts when i tried to get admitted, a psych there accused me of doing it for attention.

what a wise woman! trying to ctb in the privacy of my own home for attention. i'm still miffed about that after all these years. what a stupid thing to say to someone.

however i don't think it's necessarily a bad thing if it is attention you want. some people just want their voices to be heard in any way it can be.

 

[Suicidebydeath]

If you're in the UK maybe you could self-admit. I don't know how that would go, the NHS has limited resources, but I wish you the best.

 

[ijustwishtodie]

No, just haven't. Personally, if I want to ctb, I want it to succeed and not fail. In my opinion, if you want to do a suicide attempt with the intent of failing and getting hospitalised, you're better off just not doing the suicide attempt and instead voluntarily admitting yourself to the hospital. A lot of suicide attempts are risky and could leave you off with worse pain than if you were to never ctb to begin with so I think you should only ctb if you want to be dead

 

[zeecen]

I've just shown up at the emergency room and asked to be admitted.

 

[evoker]

no, i've never done it for attention, however on one of my attempts when i tried to get admitted, a psych there accused me of doing it for attention.

what a wise woman! trying to ctb in the privacy of my own home for attention. i'm still miffed about that after all these years. what a stupid thing to say to someone.

however i don't think it's necessarily a bad thing if it is attention you want. some people just want their voices to be heard in any way it can be.

I'm so sorry to hear that? people are so horrible and quick to judge when it comes to attempts !! especially with all the misconceptions about suicidal people. she's clearly insolent, im so sorry she was like that, its a shock to me that so many psychs manage to get a position like that considering how they act,,,

it'd stick with me too !! I'd be fumed in all honesty, because its such an immature mindset

and also i agree, with the last paragraph. ur so right ! i really get everything uve said, ur cool ^^

If you're in the UK maybe you could self-admit. I don't know how that would go, the NHS has limited resources, but I wish you the best.

thankyouu !! and is ur icon argenti? thats sick!

No, just haven't. Personally, if I want to ctb, I want it to succeed and not fail. In my opinion, if you want to do a suicide attempt with the intent of failing and getting hospitalised, you're better off just not doing the suicide attempt and instead voluntarily admitting yourself to the hospital. A lot of suicide attempts are risky and could leave you off with worse pain than if you were to never ctb to begin with so I think you should only ctb if you want to be dead

i think this is a really good take on the whole discussion. thanks!