Venting Have you ever been cheated on? (I'm feeling so betrayed)

[MorsVoluntaria]

I'm currently a bit drunk right now, and I can't stop ruminating about my current relationship with my partner of about two years.

I found out last year, that he had been texting escorts/prostitutes, asking for their prices and locations. I confronted him about this, but he claimed that it was only "jerk-off" material to him, and that he'd never meet up with them. Still, I feel so betrayed and hurt. Stupidly, I continue to be with him, likely blinded by my "love" (obsession) and low self-esteem.

April and May of this year, we were on a break with our relationship, but we continued to see each other sexually. He later admitted that he had sex with an escort, and I also found on his OnlyFans, a video of him receiving a handjob from one of his female best friends when he went to visit her. She lives 9 hours away. I asked him before he met up with her if they were going to have sex because he told me before that she offered to have sex with him. He claimed that she said she was no longer interested. I had his location and noticed that he turned it off at certain points. He later admitted to me that they visited nudist/swinger resorts. He also posted on Reddit looking for local couples and swingers to meet with. He claimed he never had sex with her, but I somewhat doubt that.

When I admitted to him how hurt I was about these actions, he vehemently denied that he did nothing wrong because we were not officially together, which is true. But he did nothing to acknowledge my feelings, only defend himself. He continues to text escorts. We are currently long distance, but during a video call, he shared his screen and I saw he was messaging several other women. I asked him about it and he admitted that they were escorts, but he'd never meet with them. I have told him multiple times, how much him messaging escorts upsets me and affects my sense of self-worth, but he still continues.

Am I a fool for continuing to be with this man? I have tried to block him and leave him, but I always go back to him because he is my first relationship, and I don't have any friends or anyone to open up to outside of him. I'll also admit that I am autistic, so I am not the best at interpersonal relationships.

I honestly regret entering a relationship while mentally unwell. I remember the pain it brings me, much more than the loneliness it alleviated.

Has anyone else ever been cheated on? or been in similar situations? I want to hear other stories, to try to figure out what to do.

 

[No More Tears]

IMO, yes, this is a hurtful situation. When he said you guys were not "officially together", maybe not, but he knew he had your heart in his hands, and just crushed it on you.

Long distance relationships rarely tend to work. He has also shown he tends to lie a lot, and he tries to cover it up. Sounds like he knew he was busted, and is trying to make up for it, and I don't see anything changing about the situation.

Me personally, I'd end it. It may hurt to do this, but think of the pain and suffering you won't be dealing with in the future.

Best of luck to you.

 

[Eternal Eyes]

Once, sadly. My ex, and even worse, someone I considered a friend, taking advantage of me been out town and without a phone for 24 hours. In hindsight, it was a blessing in disguise, it was an awful relationship that was draining me. I can laugh about it now to be honest, but man at the time I was devastated.

I would personally say you should leave him, it appears he does not value you. I wish you all the best with this, heck knows it's a horrible feeling getting betrayed like that. Stay strong.

 

[Spreadingmywings]

No! Cheaters are the lowest.

Spoiler: Castration

 

[EvisceratedJester]

No! Cheaters are the lowest.

Spoiler: Castration

View attachment 147324

Catch who cheating? You're single.

 

[escape_from_hell]

Don't feel betrayed.

This is the much revered, much lauded and trumpeted human intellect and spirit:
"genital touchy wee wee feel good yaayyy I so speshul cuz hawty tuch speshul place"

That's it. That's all humans come down to when you hear all these bullshit artists rambling on and on insufferably about these intangible human qualities and high-mindedness. Genital touchy feel good. That's it. Got a big special scientist? Lots of special theories? They are still no better than genital touchy feel good.

Got a great counterpoint? Tesla was asexual and did all this genius shit? Guess what: playing with electronics WAS HIS PEEPEE TOUCHEE EQUIVALENT.

We are just feel-goody-seeky. THAT IS IT.

 

[Spreadingmywings]

Catch who cheating? You're single.

Post in thread 'um question'
https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/um-question.173598/post-2612709

 

[EvisceratedJester]

What?

Also, @Spreadingmywings I'm not being used as a cumdumpster because

Spoiler

 

[Spreadingmywings]

What?

Also, @Spreadingmywings I'm not being used as a cumdumpster because

Spoiler

I too am pure. Do u think we could sleep with each other nicely? This would be us

Spoiler: Drawing

exploring each oth.. for 1st.. time

Sike lil ahh nigga. Holler back at me if you need this link: So you can get the knowledge and hide them 304 numbers better. It will help you cope more efficiently fr fr

 

[EvisceratedJester]

I too am pure. Do u think we could sleep with each other nicely? This would be us

Spoiler: Drawing

exploring each oth.. for 1st.. timeView attachment 147337

Sike lil ahh nigga. Holler back at me if you need this link: View attachment 147338 So you can get the knowledge and hide them 304 numbers better. It will help you cope more efficiently fr fr

Hide what exactly? The most I've done is sext and video call other men and my bf already knows about it since that's how I met him.

(I'm not even joking. That's actually how we met)


Also, I feel like I'm derailing the thread a bit. Sorry OP.

 

[Spreadingmywings]

Don't feel betrayed.

This is the much revered, much lauded and trumpeted human intellect and spirit:
"genital touchy wee wee feel good yaayyy I so speshul cuz hawty tuch speshul place"

That's it. That's all humans come down to when you hear all these bullshit artists rambling on and on insufferably about these intangible human qualities and high-mindedness. Genital touchy feel good. That's it. Got a big special scientist? Lots of special theories? They are still no better than genital touchy feel good.

Got a great counterpoint? Tesla was asexual and did all this genius shit? Guess what: playing with electronics WAS HIS PEEPEE TOUCHEE EQUIVALENT.

We are just feel-goody-seeky. THAT IS IT.

Actually it was a pigeon. Research a bit more

 

[escape_from_hell]

Actually it was a pigeon. Research a bit more

That Tesla molested & was in love with pigeons is common knowledge.

 

[shiyu123]

Estou um pouco bêbado agora e não consigo parar de pensar sobre meu relacionamento atual com meu parceiro há cerca de dois anos.

Descobri no ano passado que ele estava mandando mensagens de texto para acompanhantes/prostitutas, perguntando sobre seus preços e localizações. Eu o confrontei sobre isso, mas ele alegou que era apenas material de "punheta" para ele, e que ele nunca se encontraria com elas. Ainda assim, me sinto tão traída e magoada. Estupidamente, continuo com ele, provavelmente cega pelo meu "amor" (obsessão) e baixa autoestima.

Em abril e maio deste ano, estávamos em um intervalo no nosso relacionamento, mas continuamos a nos ver sexualmente. Mais tarde, ele admitiu que fez sexo com uma acompanhante, e também encontrei no OnlyFans dele um vídeo dele recebendo uma punheta de uma de suas melhores amigas quando foi visitá-la. Ela mora a 9 horas de distância. Perguntei a ele antes de encontrá-la se eles iriam fazer sexo porque ele me disse antes que ela se ofereceu para fazer sexo com ele. Ele alegou que ela disse que não estava mais interessada. Eu tinha a localização dele e percebi que ele a desligou em certos momentos. Mais tarde, ele admitiu para mim que eles visitaram resorts de nudismo/swing. Ele também postou no Reddit procurando por casais locais e swingers para se encontrar. Ele alegou que nunca fez sexo com ela, mas eu duvido um pouco disso.

Quando admiti a ele o quanto fiquei magoada com essas ações, ele negou veementemente que não fez nada de errado porque não estávamos oficialmente juntos, o que é verdade. Mas ele não fez nada para reconhecer meus sentimentos, apenas se defendeu. Ele continua enviando mensagens de texto para acompanhantes. Atualmente, estamos em uma longa distância, mas durante uma chamada de vídeo, ele compartilhou sua tela e vi que ele estava enviando mensagens para várias outras mulheres. Perguntei a ele sobre isso e ele admitiu que elas eram acompanhantes, mas ele nunca as encontraria. Eu disse a ele várias vezes o quanto ele enviar mensagens para acompanhantes me incomoda e afeta meu senso de autoestima, mas ele ainda continua.

Eu sou uma idiota por continuar com esse homem? Eu tentei bloqueá-lo e deixá-lo, mas eu sempre volto para ele porque ele é meu primeiro relacionamento, e eu não tenho amigos ou alguém para me abrir fora dele. Eu também admito que sou autista, então não sou a melhor em relacionamentos interpessoais.

Sinceramente, lamento ter entrado em um relacionamento quando estava mentalmente doente. Lembro-me da dor que isso me traz, muito mais do que da solidão que alivia.

Alguém mais já foi traído? Ou esteve em situações semelhantes? Quero ouvir outras histórias, para tentar descobrir o que fazer.

My ex did similar things, I found out in the worst way possible, it affected me a lot, my self-esteem dropped completely, I became depressed because I told him how much it hurt me and he continued and even lied to me, it turns out that I kept remembering these events and I ended up going crazy, until I decided to confront him, he didn't like it at all, he ended up victimizing himself and putting the blame on me, that I couldn't satisfy him enough, in the end he ended up breaking up with me, which was the that I should have done. I could have done it, but I didn't have the courage because I was obsessed with him and his love.

 

[BlazingBob]

I've been cheated on twice. Both times it felt like getting hit in the stomach with a baseball bat when I found out. I think you should drop this person. Like ripping off a bandaid, the faster the better, and don't look back. They never change. One of the things that appeals to me about ctb is never having to deal with humans again and all their bullshit. The vast majority of them are nothing but a major disappointment and royal pain in the ass, but I digress.