Has anyone experienced suicidal thoughts due to bullying in college/university?

[DeathIsTheWayOut99]

Almost everyone I talk to who goes to college talks about how mature people are and how the made great friends

Along with horrific child abuse I was bullied and sexually assaulted in college. My school didnt care when I reported the abuse. I dealt with laughing behind my back, people cursing me in my face, etc. I thought high school was supposed to be worse than college but, its honestly another reason why I want to CTB

I dont even want to get a job since I know I will be abused there as well. And before you said "you cant predict the future" when you have been abused at every stage in your life, you learn to accept your fate. Realistically, I would end my life by jumping off a bridge

 

[Angina]

Similar in my case, but not as bad as what you experienced. I'm sad that you had to go through all this. I was bullied but not that extremely. I became suicidal while starting high school.

 

[Khyber]

I was bullied badly too but the worst of it was during primary school. It must have been horrible for you at college as you would expect people to be better than that at that age.

Only thing I would say about a job is that there's a responsibility for employers to make sure bullying doesn't occur in the workplace. I get that you expect to be bullied but there's a chance that you might not be. Also if it did happen you could end up getting a payout. Not trying to be dismissive of your fears but there are decent people in the world so you never know until you try.

 

[Brokenwithbpd]

Yes last year in my masters program. I then got kicked out for mental health side effects

 

[sourcreamonion]

I'm sorry that you had to go through that. I wasn't necessarily bullied, however, I was surrounded by a toxic-masculinity filled group which constantly bantered and threw uncomfortable jests that made me feel like I wasn't worth enough, and the blatant racism towards me and others only worsened it. Not to mention I was taken advantage of at a party when I was drunk, I reported it, however, similarly to your college, mine brushed it off and I remember the police asking me if I "enjoyed it or not".

I hope you don't mind me asking, but if you could work a job comfortably, what job exactly would you have in mind? Again, I'm sorry you had to go through that, you can't rely on anyone when it comes to school officials. I wish the best for you in all ways.

 

[DeathIsTheWayOut99]

I was bullied badly too but the worst of it was during primary school. It must have been horrible for you at college as you would expect people to be better than that at that age.

Only thing I would say about a job is that there's a responsibility for employers to make sure bullying doesn't occur in the workplace. I get that you expect to be bullied but there's a chance that you might not be. Also if it did happen you could end up getting a payout. Not trying to be dismissive of your fears but there are decent people in the world so you never know until you try.

Yeah. It makes me think I was created to be life bitch. If nothing is supposedly "wrong" with me then why was I singled out at every point in my life?

I feel many of us have ot accept that no matter what we will never be accepted or loved in life

I'm sorry that you had to go through that. I wasn't necessarily bullied, however, I was surrounded by a toxic-masculinity filled group which constantly bantered and threw uncomfortable jests that made me feel like I wasn't worth enough, and the blatant racism towards me and others only worsened it. Not to mention I was taken advantage of at a party when I was drunk, I reported it, however, similarly to your college, mine brushed it off and I remember the police asking me if I "enjoyed it or not".

I hope you don't mind me asking, but if you could work a job comfortably, what job exactly would you have in mind? Again, I'm sorry you had to go through that, you can't rely on anyone when it comes to school officials. I wish the best for you in all ways.

I learned that the hard way. My school just cares about their bullshit reputation. And that is the same for practically every institution. And I can relate to the blatant racism. I watched members of my anime club get ridiculed over their race.

Its nice to know there are people I can relate to and I am not alone in the "college wasn't the best 4 years of my life. It was actually hell"

If I could work....I dunno. I really dont know

 

[Deleted member 19276]

Hey, I can relate to the first part of your post entirely. It was the same situation with my schools, everyone had friends and happy good times all around while I was too busy hiding every corner I turn in a hallway in hopes some rotten abuser would not find me.

I am so terribly sorry you were sexually assaulted however. While I have perhaps been close to something similar like that happening to me, it is by no means fair that your school is turning it's back on you like that. I hope the animal or animals that did this to you get some sort of " horrible treatment " too and you get a form of justice.

The job thing, another thing I can relate to I suppose. It is almost as if the entire human nature is build across bullying and abusing. Of course, the ones to get away with it are almost always the abusers. Ugh, I am sorry... There is something very unfair in everything and seeing this, it made me realize stuff about myself too. If only I could change back the past, but we all know time stays and history gets written, no matter what. The bridge thing... I wish at times I was living close to a high enough one too. But even then, my state might push me back from jumping.

 

[DeathIsTheWayOut99]

Yeah. As you get older and open your eyes, you see how fucked up life really is. So long as the bad people know the right people to protect their asses, the victims suffer while the abusers roam free. They get their money and status, laughing and smiling knowing they can hurt people and get away with it.

Its the reason why I dont want to be in this world. Its like when you're a victim nobody seems to want to care. The system says "if you have a problem report it" they dont actually want to help you. They just have it there so they can look good on the outside. internally, they dont care. They laugh at your story, mock you, and do all they can to have a good reputation. Tbh, I wish this whole world was destroyed. Its a fucked up place

 

[Deleted member 19276]

Yeah. As you get older and open your eyes, you see how fucked up life really is. So long as the bad people know the right people to protect their asses, the victims suffer while the abusers roam free. They get their money and status, laughing and smiling knowing they can hurt people and get away with it.

Its the reason why I dont want to be in this world. Its like when you're a victim nobody seems to want to care. The system says "if you have a problem report it" they dont actually want to help you. They just have it there so they can look good on the outside. internally, they dont care. They laugh at your story, mock you, and do all they can to have a good reputation. Tbh, I wish this whole world was destroyed. Its a fucked up place

It's true. Everything you said there. There was a time a set of abusers ( I wouldn't really call them bullies, it was beyond bullying ) asked of me to jump off a second floor balcony, threw my school bag before that off it and then when I did what they asked while I was crying, they told me to get on my knees and beg for my life. It is moments like this you realize, there is no justice, no system, not anything... This World, it feeds off it's victims. The mind that could do what I mentioned above, it is no human. How could anyone defy that as human... This World, something has been wrong with it from day one. The more I go, the harder it seems to remember what actually feels good and well, seeing more people hurt in similar or worse fashions, proves my extremely negative views at times that maybe all is not worth it in the end. Anyway, I don't mean to sound cruel or harsh, it's just hard to comprehend how such disturbing things exist at times.

 

[Lonelyhotcake]

I thought I was the only one who experienced bullying in university.

My family used to said that "nerds" go there to study, so I wouldn't have problems to make friends.

Last year, I've been CRIYING to my parents the whole year and they just said: "It's going to end soon, hang in there!".

I feel so lonely. I hate going there, I could literally k*ll myself instead of going back.