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Skyyyfarer 26

Plagued by existence
Jul 22, 2023
32
A couple weeks ago I had opened up to one of my closest friends about ctb and she just said all people who are suicidal are mentally unstable and need to be involuntarily hospitalized. When I said i think it's a human right she said that it's equivalent to murder and said a lot of negative stuff about people who wanted to ctb. She kept saying that she had wanted to ctb in the past because of something bad had happened to her but her boyfriend had saved her then and she kept going about having found her bf had saved her life
I don't think that has anything to do with me wanting to ctb because I have been in relationships before but that did not change my decision to ctb and my decision literally does not harm or involve any other person physically, mentally or emotionally so I don't understand her point
 
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StolenLife

StolenLife

Warlock
Sep 19, 2022
740
Your friend might be in denial about life. She is probably afraid to spiral back into the darkness herself which is why she is distancing herself from anything to do with suicidal people.
My friend stopped communicating with me altogether after I opened up to her about my trauma and suicidal thoughts. Whatever, I'm better off alone anyways. I know the feeling sucks though.
 
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iDieUDie80

iDieUDie80

Arcanist
Jul 6, 2020
403
It isn't surprising that probably most people don't respect a person's autonomy when it comes to a decision to end one's own life. This is because there is a general agreement that suicide is never the answer, and that we should intervene and do the best we can to keep suicidal people safe and provide them the help they need.
I agree with the latter, but disagree that suicide isn't sometimes the solution in certain cases.
 
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Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
9,883
A couple weeks ago I had opened up to one of my closest friends about ctb and she just said all people who are suicidal are mentally unstable and need to be involuntarily hospitalized. When I said i think it's a human right she said that it's equivalent to murder and said a lot of negative stuff about people who wanted to ctb. She kept saying that she had wanted to ctb in the past because of something bad had happened to her but her boyfriend had saved her then and she kept going about having found her bf had saved her life
I don't think that has anything to do with me wanting to ctb because I have been in relationships before but that did not change my decision to ctb and my decision literally does not harm or involve any other person physically, mentally or emotionally so I don't understand her point

Is she religious by any chance? Viewing suicide as a type of murder I would say isn't uncommon. But it's a weird idea. To me at any rate- it seems to suggest our lives aren't our own. So- who do they belong to? God? Society? Our parents? How can it even be possible to murder yourself- if you are yourself and you gave yourself permission to do it?!!

But then- that's just it. She clearly thinks a person isn't themselves when they are thinking like that. Did she consider herself to be mentally ill I wonder- when she had those thoughts? Possessed by some kind of demon or irrational madness. I'd be curious if I were you... Does she really think her thinking was entirely different at that point?

As for my experience, I'm quite careful about who I reveal this side of myself to. I tend to only open up if I get the impression that they feel the same. But like you- it doesn't always go all that well. One friend who I knew struggled simply said: 'I don't want to consider that shit.' So- that was the end of that really! It was a surprise though. Some of their family worked in therapy. I would have thought that would have made them more open to talking about stuff like that- but perhaps not. Some therapists just seem to shut down talk like that- so- perhaps they learnt to think and talk the same way! Lol.
 
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DynamicDepression

Deranged
Mar 28, 2022
352
It is always sad and disheartening when someone you are close to and consider an empathic and intelligent person becomes a monster at even the slightest mention of suicide and/or assisted dying being a human right. Whenever I have brought it up, even the people who are otherwise respectful and kind have started throwing slurs and insults at me. I suppose it's just a dogma that most people will never question and instead blindly defend. Considering rational suicide and assisted dying to be murder or insanity, I mean.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
38,939
I personally don't see openly talking about suicide as being a good idea at all. That person you were talking to sounds like they lack any compassion and awareness, what they are saying is complete nonsense, I cannot comprehend the anti-suicide view, I find it hard to take people like that seriously and they come across as insane to me.
 
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jbear824

jbear824

F*ck humanity. Let's end this.
Jul 4, 2023
409
No, but only because I can't talk about it with the people in my life. It upsets them too much. I pretty much have to keep it to myself.
 
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Skyyyfarer 26

Plagued by existence
Jul 22, 2023
32
It is always sad and disheartening when someone you are close to and consider an empathic and intelligent person becomes a monster at even the slightest mention of suicide and/or assisted dying being a human right. Whenever I have brought it up, even the people who are otherwise respectful and kind have started throwing slurs and insults at me. I suppose it's just a dogma that most people will never question and instead blindly defend. Considering rational suicide and assisted dying to be murder or insanity, I mean.
Yes that is mostly the case
When it comes to suicide people blame the same person that they say they care about and want to save so much
Is she religious by any chance? Viewing suicide as a type of murder I would say isn't uncommon. But it's a weird idea. To me at any rate- it seems to suggest our lives aren't our own. So- who do they belong to? God? Society? Our parents? How can it even be possible to murder yourself- if you are yourself and you gave yourself permission to do it?!!

But then- that's just it. She clearly thinks a person isn't themselves when they are thinking like that. Did she consider herself to be mentally ill I wonder- when she had those thoughts? Possessed by some kind of demon or irrational madness. I'd be curious if I were you... Does she really think her thinking was entirely different at that point?

As for my experience, I'm quite careful about who I reveal this side of myself to. I tend to only open up if I get the impression that they feel the same. But like you- it doesn't always go all that well. One friend who I knew struggled simply said: 'I don't want to consider that shit.' So- that was the end of that really! It was a surprise though. Some of their family worked in therapy. I would have thought that would have made them more open to talking about stuff like that- but perhaps not. Some therapists just seem to shut down talk like that- so- perhaps they learnt to think and talk the same way! Lol.
As far as I know she is an atheist like me and seemed pretty rational to me that's why I decided to open up to her but you're right it's better to keep these opinions to oneself as it's considered so much taboo
She just kept saying how her boyfriend saved her life and she would have regretted if she died because of her boyfriend
I mean i am happy she found someone to live for but for most people who want to ctb including myself relationships don't usually change our decision? I just feel when someone decides to take their life people often invalidate their feelings and just look for things to blame it on everything except considering the fact that maybe the person's life was truly painful and unlivable and that's why they came to such a decision
 
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