Vivacious_Vee
Member
- Jun 17, 2023
- 70
Hi all
So have been on here today for around 5 hours on and off, just thinking of what to do, this has to be done today, I need to catch the bus today or asap.
Went to Grenville Smith Park off North Street, Southville in Bristol, sat on the grass (with some ice cream and cake from the deli), thinking all my plans have been thwarted, I need to approach this a different way, over the last 2 says, have been tidying up, nearly all my clothes are in the bin. Have written a letter to each of my children and such. I thought there was a magic pill if I am honest, where I could just take it and then stay on that bus and never get off!!! BUT no, soooooo it is looking like hanging, I have a pull up bar, so will put that behind the top bathroom door, then attach a sheet, put Vaseline (or something) on the sheet so make it slide easy. Then inside as door opens out, put a bar or handle through door handle, then it wont open, taking longer to get in, I need this to work and do not want to come back brain dead!!!
I was slowly getting there, slowly, but this has pushed me over the edge, I do not want to be here and the only way to catch the bus is suspension. If there is an easier way, then please share, but I need to do this, go another tup of ice cream to eat, so will do more reading as have to get this perfect...... Mum has some crazy assed meds, but not sure if she will share, and not looking to put her in that position, or take them and make her feel bad, or have other family members blame her... you know....
Reason bathroom, so no one can get in and if suspension, then I need to make sure my feed don't find the bar, so bar behind door. I want this quick, did not get alcohol, want to be sober and do this correctly, with no fuck ups.
There is nothing keeping me here, have thought it over and over, nothing is keeping me here, the pdsa have bullied me into agreeing for Inka to have a FHO with them chiselling the bone, making it worse, vet could not give me 1, just 1 success story with a dog over 15kg, having a FHO and due to not having 10k for hip replacement (tried with just giving) feel so bad, (if I was still working, then I would pay myself, but after SA under GA left job, credit reference shit and no money to even pay rent) I am mentally unable to watch those humans hurt Inka anymore, all the converstaoins are saved on yourtube private. After the SA last year while under GA, now Inka, the most beloved hound, no... .I will not stay here, this world is not only corrupt but those who are supposed to help but dont unless they have the correct fee in place.... Evil, making a dog suffer...
Humans are the only beings on earth that pay to live....
So have been on here today for around 5 hours on and off, just thinking of what to do, this has to be done today, I need to catch the bus today or asap.
Went to Grenville Smith Park off North Street, Southville in Bristol, sat on the grass (with some ice cream and cake from the deli), thinking all my plans have been thwarted, I need to approach this a different way, over the last 2 says, have been tidying up, nearly all my clothes are in the bin. Have written a letter to each of my children and such. I thought there was a magic pill if I am honest, where I could just take it and then stay on that bus and never get off!!! BUT no, soooooo it is looking like hanging, I have a pull up bar, so will put that behind the top bathroom door, then attach a sheet, put Vaseline (or something) on the sheet so make it slide easy. Then inside as door opens out, put a bar or handle through door handle, then it wont open, taking longer to get in, I need this to work and do not want to come back brain dead!!!
I was slowly getting there, slowly, but this has pushed me over the edge, I do not want to be here and the only way to catch the bus is suspension. If there is an easier way, then please share, but I need to do this, go another tup of ice cream to eat, so will do more reading as have to get this perfect...... Mum has some crazy assed meds, but not sure if she will share, and not looking to put her in that position, or take them and make her feel bad, or have other family members blame her... you know....
Reason bathroom, so no one can get in and if suspension, then I need to make sure my feed don't find the bar, so bar behind door. I want this quick, did not get alcohol, want to be sober and do this correctly, with no fuck ups.
There is nothing keeping me here, have thought it over and over, nothing is keeping me here, the pdsa have bullied me into agreeing for Inka to have a FHO with them chiselling the bone, making it worse, vet could not give me 1, just 1 success story with a dog over 15kg, having a FHO and due to not having 10k for hip replacement (tried with just giving) feel so bad, (if I was still working, then I would pay myself, but after SA under GA left job, credit reference shit and no money to even pay rent) I am mentally unable to watch those humans hurt Inka anymore, all the converstaoins are saved on yourtube private. After the SA last year while under GA, now Inka, the most beloved hound, no... .I will not stay here, this world is not only corrupt but those who are supposed to help but dont unless they have the correct fee in place.... Evil, making a dog suffer...
Humans are the only beings on earth that pay to live....
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