Hanging didn't work and I'm devastated

[soda_pressed]

A few days ago, I tried to ctb by partial hanging.
I thought I did everything right - drank to diminish SI and thought I made the knots right.

My method was using a scarf - I tied two knots around where my carotid arteries were, then using the rest of the scarf I tied it around my neck in a normal (albiet tight knot) which was attached to a door.

All that happened was I noticed a sort of ringing/low noise in my ears and I could feel my head felt weird, although I could breath a little bit (I didn't want to suffocate).

I'm absolutely devastated it didn't work, and have only felt more upset and isolated because of it.

I tried to message a few people on here but they ignored me. It saddened me when even on a suicide forum I feel so alone as no one could be bothered to answer.

If anyone can help, please respond

 

[fister]

So did you try partial suspension, full suspension, tightening the scarf with a rigid rod, or what?

 

[soda_pressed]

Partial suspension. I didn't tighten it with anything after I put it on my neck, I just made sure it was really tight as I put it on.

 

[jordan01]

I tried partial suspension too and all i got was crazy ringing in my ears during and for the week after.Was a thick bathrobe belt and was attached to a sturdy frame.I literally tried 4 times in a row.

 

[Kikoo Loool]

I failed too, I couldn't find the good spot on my neck.

 

[Worndown]

Partial lets you put less than 100% of your weight on the noose. Looking at the volume of posts, it looks like most fail.
Unless there is equipment failure or rescue, I don't see this problem with full.
With all the heartache caused by failure, one should choose the method that will get the job done.

 

[Halo13]

I'm sorry you feel so disappointed and isolated. I can't give much advice on hanging but at least wanted to let you know you're not alone. It is a horrid feeling realizing you've failed at releasing yourself from suffering. Hugs.

 

[TiredHorse]

I'm absolutely devastated it didn't work, and have only felt more upset and isolated because of it.

I am so very, very sorry. My failed attempts with eb/N2 were the most emotionally exhausting experiences of my life. It's devastating to try and fail. Please know that you are not alone.

I hope you're not beating yourself up about it. Partial seems incredibly difficult to get right --of all the methods discussed here, I think everyone who has ever written "I'm trying tonight" with partial as a method has been back soon afterward mourning a failed attempt. It is a good method for its accessibility, but it seems hellishly difficult to succeed with.

All I can suggest is to be kind to yourself if you possibly can. Take a little while to catch your balance. Try to get some rest. Be gentle with yourself.

 

[jordan01]

Before I tried I figured it would be easy with all the celeb deaths from it...Makes you wonder how many times they tried before they suceeded.

 

[iwannaendme]

Shit, on monday I'm doing exact thing that you. I'm using scarf. I hope I won't be back tho. Feel so sorry for you. That fucking sucks and you must feel horrible after you wanted to ctb and it didn't worked.

Can you tell me how long did it took for you to realize it won't work today? Like, you were pushing yourself down and what everything did you felt?

 

[Retched]

I failed at this too. December 23 will be etched in my mind for a long time because I came so close. I couldn't push through.

 

[Mogley26]

A few days ago, I tried to ctb by partial hanging.
I thought I did everything right - drank to diminish SI and thought I made the knots right.

My method was using a scarf - I tied two knots around where my carotid arteries were, then using the rest of the scarf I tied it around my neck in a normal (albiet tight knot) which was attached to a door.

All that happened was I noticed a sort of ringing/low noise in my ears and I could feel my head felt weird, although I could breath a little bit (I didn't want to suffocate).

I'm absolutely devastated it didn't work, and have only felt more upset and isolated because of it.

I tried to message a few people on here but they ignored me. It saddened me when even on a suicide forum I feel so alone as no one could be bothered to answer.

If anyone can help, please respond

Over and over my si kicked in with partial. Do you have a way to do full? I had a chance to do full two nights ago. My mind went numb so I took the rope off. I've done this a few times before. Next Tuesday is my next chance. I need to do it. With full there is no stopping it once you step off the chair but I only have a chance once a week. It felt like I failed myself and everything got scarier after attempts. Where are you in the world?

 

[TiredHorse]

Over and over my si kicked in [...] My mind went numb so I took the rope off. I've done this a few times before. [...] It felt like I failed myself and everything got scarier after attempts.

That was me with eb/N2. I still don't know why I took the bag off my head. Later attempts got more difficult, too.

 

[Mogley26]

That was me with eb/N2. I still don't know why I took the bag off my head. Later attempts got more difficult, too.

Sorry to hear that. I never imagined I'd have to trick myself into suicide but tricking SI seems the only way.

 

[Halo13]

That was me with eb/N2. I still don't know why I took the bag off my head. Later attempts got more difficult, too.

Was it the hyperbaric alarm you taught me about? Sounds possible.

Over and over my si kicked in with partial. Do you have a way to do full? I had a chance to do full two nights ago. My mind went numb so I took the rope off. I've done this a few times before. Next Tuesday is my next chance. I need to do it. With full there is no stopping it once you step off the chair but I only have a chance once a week. It felt like I failed myself and everything got scarier after attempts. Where are you in the world?

You are much braver than I. That sounds so scary.

 

[TiredHorse]

Was it the hyperbaric alarm you taught me about? Sounds possible.

Hypercapnic alarm --and no, I have no such excuse. The method appeared to be functioning perfectly. It was SI. Again and again and again, SI.

 

[soda_pressed]

I am so very, very sorry. My failed attempts with eb/N2 were the most emotionally exhausting experiences of my life. It's devastating to try and fail. Please know that you are not alone.

I hope you're not beating yourself up about it. Partial seems incredibly difficult to get right --of all the methods discussed here, I think everyone who has ever written "I'm trying tonight" with partial as a method has been back soon afterward mourning a failed attempt. It is a good method for its accessibility, but it seems hellishly difficult to succeed with.

All I can suggest is to be kind to yourself if you possibly can. Take a little while to catch your balance. Try to get some rest. Be gentle with yourself.

It seems so easy at first but it's really not. I might try and go for full but I'm scared I'm going to suffocate instead of cutting off my blood supply. Sorry to hear about your attempts too, and thank you for your kind words x

Shit, on monday I'm doing exact thing that you. I'm using scarf. I hope I won't be back tho. Feel so sorry for you. That fucking sucks and you must feel horrible after you wanted to ctb and it didn't worked.

Can you tell me how long did it took for you to realize it won't work today? Like, you were pushing yourself down and what everything did you felt?

It took a good few attempts. I kept moving the scarf, trying making sure I was putting pressure on my neck but nothing happened. Maybe it's because of the shape of my neck. Probably need to find a new way to ctb x

 

[Ivenocare]

It seems so easy at first but it's really not. I might try and go for full but I'm scared I'm going to suffocate instead of cutting off my blood supply. Sorry to hear about your attempts too, and thank you for your kind words x

It took a good few attempts. I kept moving the scarf, trying making sure I was putting pressure on my neck but nothing happened. Maybe it's because of the shape of my neck. Probably need to find a new way to ctb. I might jump instead but I'm not sure. x

It took me multiple attempts to find my sweet spot; by any chance have you tried lower part of neck and leaning forward while standing? I couldnt get fuzzy and warm feeling from under my chin. I personally have scarf tied to otherside of doorknob and above door; I stand and lean forward and scarf under my adams apple tightly; I also sometimes stand on my tippy toes and raise my hands upward, I think this help open my muscles on neck up because I get feeling easier that way; just something to share. Sorry it didn't go as planned <3 I hope you find peace soon!

 

[soda_pressed]

Over and over my si kicked in with partial. Do you have a way to do full? I had a chance to do full two nights ago. My mind went numb so I took the rope off. I've done this a few times before. Next Tuesday is my next chance. I need to do it. With full there is no stopping it once you step off the chair but I only have a chance once a week. It felt like I failed myself and everything got scarier after attempts. Where are you in the world?

I'd want to do full but there's nowhere in my house where I could put the noose over, and I don't really like the idea of ctb outside (if I can help it). The other thing that I liked about partial was that I didn't really get a SI - I told myself since it was partial and I could technically stop it, that my last proper attempt was only a "test run" even though I was ready

 

[Hotsackage]

Partial is hard unless you're a celebrity

 

[Dreamcolleger]

What about trying with a thin rope so it can make sure to get your arteries?

Did you push down hard and fast or ease into it?

 

[Mogley26]

I'd want to do full but there's nowhere in my house where I could put the noose over, and I don't really like the idea of ctb outside (if I can help it). The other thing that I liked about partial was that I didn't really get a SI - I told myself since it was partial and I could technically stop it, that my last proper attempt was only a "test run" even though I was ready

I don't want to do it outside either but a tree in the back yard at a certain time every week is my only option. I wish you the best.

 

[soda_pressed]

It took me multiple attempts to find my sweet spot; by any chance have you tried lower part of neck and leaning forward while standing? I couldnt get fuzzy and warm feeling from under my chin. I personally have scarf tied to otherside of doorknob and above door; I stand and lean forward and scarf under my adams apple tightly; I also sometimes stand on my tippy toes and raise my hands upward, I think this help open my muscles on neck up because I get feeling easier that way; just something to share. Sorry it did go as planned <3 I hope you find peace soon!

I tried that but only when sitting. I'll do a test run again with partial but standing this time (feet on the ground but just). Thank you very much for the advice

 

[Alec]

I'm so sorry they didn't respond to you, please know that you are know alone!!! I'm with you always for whatever that means for whatever you want! I wish I could offer you some advice but I don't know much about hanging, I've never tried it, have been researching partial suspension because it is very appealing to me but I didn't go into it too deep because in the end I'm very afraid to suffocate. It terrifies me.

 

[FauxEmotions]

I think the issues could have been noose not tightening and placement of it. You want to the knot to continually tighten until you're unconscious. Look up videos on how to execute the Rear Naked Choke and that should help you find the carotid artery. As far as tightening the noose, try standing up, tighten the noose as tight as you can, take a deep breath, lean head forward and then bend down until you "go to sleep".

 

[JadedGray]

Sorry it didn't work out for you. :(
Despite hanging being one of the most common methods, it seems to be one of the most difficult.

 

[soda_pressed]

I'm so sorry they didn't respond to you, please know that you are know alone!!! I'm with you always for whatever that means for whatever you want! I wish I could offer you some advice but I don't know much about hanging, I've never tried it, have been researching partial suspension because it is very appealing to me but I didn't go into it too deep because in the end I'm very afraid to suffocate. It terrifies me.

Thank you so much! <3 Suffocating scares me too, that's what I worry about with hanging

 

[I cant think of name]

A few days ago, I tried to ctb by partial hanging.
I thought I did everything right - drank to diminish SI and thought I made the knots right.

My method was using a scarf - I tied two knots around where my carotid arteries were, then using the rest of the scarf I tied it around my neck in a normal (albiet tight knot) which was attached to a door.

All that happened was I noticed a sort of ringing/low noise in my ears and I could feel my head felt weird, although I could breath a little bit (I didn't want to suffocate).

I'm absolutely devastated it didn't work, and have only felt more upset and isolated because of it.

I tried to message a few people on here but they ignored me. It saddened me when even on a suicide forum I feel so alone as no one could be bothered to answer.

If anyone can help, please respond

I've experimented with partial hanging over 40 times, lol I wish this was an exaggeration, bit I finally got it right yesterday...I'll share what I learned. I used many materials but a 6 foot long charging cord ( I found using something thinner helped it cut of circulation better) is what finally worked. I tied a simple slip know ( so it clamps down on you're arteries) and put it on a hook on my door ( I found standing up makes it easier to lean forward and put pressure) then you lean forward on it quite a bit (might kinda feel like ur falling) between The base of your neck And Adam's apple. (If I did it high it cut of my air supply or hurt my neck, lower and it just my my head feel like exploding but never pass out) There's also I video somewhere on here I think someone named it the ideal video for those interested in partial hanging or something (basically a video explaining how it works but trying to prevent it). I was out in a few seconds and only woke up when my body slammed into the door )I think from compulsions I'm going to pad next time for less sound)... anyways I hope that helped :)

 

[Pan]

Partial hanging often fails, but hanging itself is one of the more effective methods at catching the bus peacefully and quickly. Full suspension is the only reliable method to employ; it allows for little time to think, thus minimizing that nuisance called SI. With full suspension, there is no turning back, no opportunity for second thoughts, no reconsidering. Bingo.

 

[lifeisbutadream]

There is a video of a fellow who did partial very quickly and successfully. Not sure but i think it was in Sweden. The camera was still running when the police came. Perhaps someone has the link so you can see how he did it