Had my 4th Ketamine treatment this week

[Apathy's Girl]

I have bipolar disorder and the depression gets so debilitating. For over a month all I could do was curl up in a ball on the floor with our dog or sleep until 3pm. There was a span of over 2 weeks when I didn't shower or change my clothes. I had a glimmer of hope when my sn arrived in the mail three and a half weeks ago but my husband threw it out. I finally called my psychiatrist and told her I needed to be voluntarily committed just to get help. She said no, what I really needed was Ketamine infusions. We talked about Ketamine before but she never actually told me that I needed to get it. It was hard to force myself to go to the evaluation visit. I was a mess. Now that I've had four of my six treatments I really notice a huge difference. It makes me wonder why I take nine different medications a day and still go into deep depressions when one drug pulled me out of it. I don't know how long this feeling will last. I still have two treatments left and then maintenance treatments afterwards. I know I'm lucky because my insurance covers the doctor's visit portion of the treatment and I just have to pay for the actual drug itself. It's not super expensive, $225 per infusion, but I know it is more than many can afford. So for now I'm not exactly happy (I don't know if I ever was) but at least I'm not curled up in a ball on the floor.

 

[Eternaloblivionplea]

Favourite breakfast cereal is special K.

 

[Smart No More]

That's pretty great! Thanks for sharing. Are you able to describe the way the ketamine effects you and how that translates to benefits? I'm really interested. Largely because I have a neurological problem in conjunction with damaged to my nervous system and its made me much slower mentally than I used to be and damaged my natural thought cycles and memory which in turn impacts my quality of life. That in itself is massively depressing but depression isn't the issue for me. I'm wondering if ketamine might hold some promise for me.

Really hope your remaining sessions work some magic on you and you can drop the other meds! Always nice to see a success story here. A bit of positive amidst all the darkness we're wading in.

 

[6ftunder]

Super pleased that you've found something that works.
Remember recovery is a journey and not an event. Sounds like you're well on your way.

 

[RainAndSadness]

That's a very interesting post, thanks a lot for sharing your experience. I'd love to give this a try myself but sadly... it's not that easy here. You need to have exhausted most other options until they actually approve you for this type of therapy here in Switzerland. As you said, most other medications didn't work for you and I'm in the same boat. And from what I've been told they still want me to go through with all the other (rather useless) medications that I know don't work for my disorders. I've tried some of them but most side effects completely defeat their purpose in my opinion. And I don't want to go through every single anti-depressant either because 1. I've passed the point of no return with my suicide ideation 2. as a result of that, I'm not in recovery and I have no intention to go into recovery. But it would be really fucking nice for once if that crippling depression disappeared, just for a few weeks, you know. Anyway. I really appreciate your post and I'd love know if the positive effects of your treatment persist over a longer period of time. I've heard Ketamine has excellent short-term effects but apparently it tends to wear off. I really hope this treatment will give you enough energy to launch you into a new and better life.

 

[Smart No More]

That's a very interesting post, thanks a lot for sharing your experience. I'd love to give this a try myself but sadly... it's not that easy here. You need to have exhausted most other options until they actually approve you for this type of therapy here in Switzerland. As you said, most other medications didn't work for you and I'm in the same boat. And from what I've been told they still want me to go through with all the other (rather useless) medications that I know don't work for my disorders. I've tried some of them but most side effects completely defeat their purpose in my opinion. And I don't want to go through every single anti-depressant either because 1. I've passed the point of no return with my suicide ideation 2. as a result of that, I'm not in recovery and I have no intention to go into recovery. But it would be really fucking nice for once if that crippling depression disappeared, just for a few weeks, you know. Anyway. I really appreciate your post and I'd love know if the positive effects of your treatment persist over a longer period of time. I've heard Ketamine has excellent short-term effects but apparently it tends to wear off. I really hope this treatment will give you enough energy to launch you into a new and better life.

Not sure if it's a good idea or even the same but ketamine is cheap and easy to obtain on dark net markets. It's something I'd personally consider if unavailable through more official sources. I'm curious to know what the infusions consists of.

 

[braindead911]

The only unfortunate part of it is that the effects don't last at all. I've went through the treatments myself and the effects wore off after a couple weeks and I was back to square one :(

 

[Al Cappella]

What does it feel like to get it?

 

[Apathy's Girl]

Are you able to describe the way the ketamine effects you and how that translates to benefits? I'm really interested. Largely because I have a neurological problem in conjunction with damaged to my nervous system and its made me much slower mentally than I used to be and damaged my natural thought cycles and memory which in turn impacts my quality of life.

It's hard to explain the effects because it's like trying to remember a dream. I put headphones on, turn on music of my choice (I have been choosing classical), they gave me an eye mask at my first treatment that I've been bringing with me. The physician's assistant puts in the iv and in about a minute, or less, it's like I've left my body and am moving as one with the music. But, there is more to it, I can't describe the feeling, it's kind of like doing acid or mushrooms but different. There is this serenity, and then it's over. I'm back in my body, groggy, left with vague memories of the experience itself. The doctor said the therapeutic effects are in how much you dissociate from your body. I have to say I completely dissociate.

 

[Smart No More]

It's hard to explain the effects because it's like trying to remember a dream. I put headphones on, turn on music of my choice (I have been choosing classical), they gave me an eye mask at my first treatment that I've been bringing with me. The physician's assistant puts in the iv and in about a minute, or less, it's like I've left my body and am moving as one with the music. But, there is more to it, I can't describe the feeling, it's kind of like doing acid or mushrooms but different. There is this serenity, and then it's over. I'm back in my body, groggy, left with vague memories of the experience itself. The doctor said the therapeutic effects are in how much you dissociate from your body. I have to say I completely dissociate.

Thank you.That's a really helpful description. I appreciate you taking the time to reply. Do you find the groggy feeling to be a result of intoxication like a hangover or is it more a mental fatigue and does it last long?

Thanks again for answering my questions. I'm really curious but won't keep firing them at you. Much as I'm inclined to.

 

[Green Destiny]

I've heard about Ketamine treatments being very useful. Wish I could try it but I've never gotten any medication for psychological problems so my doctor would probably refuse to let me try. Glad that it seems to be working for you though.

 

[onlyanimalsaregood]

I have bipolar disorder and the depression gets so debilitating. For over a month all I could do was curl up in a ball on the floor with our dog or sleep until 3pm. There was a span of over 2 weeks when I didn't shower or change my clothes. I had a glimmer of hope when my sn arrived in the mail three and a half weeks ago but my husband threw it out. I finally called my psychiatrist and told her I needed to be voluntarily committed just to get help. She said no, what I really needed was Ketamine infusions. We talked about Ketamine before but she never actually told me that I needed to get it. It was hard to force myself to go to the evaluation visit. I was a mess. Now that I've had four of my six treatments I really notice a huge difference. It makes me wonder why I take nine different medications a day and still go into deep depressions when one drug pulled me out of it. I don't know how long this feeling will last. I still have two treatments left and then maintenance treatments afterwards. I know I'm lucky because my insurance covers the doctor's visit portion of the treatment and I just have to pay for the actual drug itself. It's not super expensive, $225 per infusion, but I know it is more than many can afford. So for now I'm not exactly happy (I don't know if I ever was) but at least I'm not curled up in a ball on the floor.

I'm glad to hear that your recovery it's going well. Ketamine it's a curious substance indeed. I hope everything continues to go well. I really wish you the best.

 

[6ftunder]

It's hard to explain the effects because it's like trying to remember a dream. I put headphones on, turn on music of my choice (I have been choosing classical), they gave me an eye mask at my first treatment that I've been bringing with me. The physician's assistant puts in the iv and in about a minute, or less, it's like I've left my body and am moving as one with the music. But, there is more to it, I can't describe the feeling, it's kind of like doing acid or mushrooms but different. There is this serenity, and then it's over. I'm back in my body, groggy, left with vague memories of the experience itself. The doctor said the therapeutic effects are in how much you dissociate from your body. I have to say I completely dissociate.

I would love to experience this. Well jel.

 

[noname223]

I am also interested in Ketamine therapy. In case my major depression returns. Though I think people who have the genetical predisposition of psychosis might are not allowed for it.

I am angry noone tried to do experimental therapy when I had 2,5 years major depression with very brutal psychosomatic pain. But partly it was my fault I denied medication for a long time.

 

[StrangePossum]

Thanks for sharing your experience, I'm really happy for you. I've been looking into ketamine therapy a bit too recently, and if the stories I've read are to be believed I am hopeful that it could actually really change the way depression is treated for the better. It's a shame that it's still seen as a last resort/experimental treatment though, many insurances will not cover it here. Hopefully more research will continue to be done on it and it will be made more widely available in the future. It's wonderful to hear how much of a difference it has made for you -- I hope things will keep getting better for you

 

[BeautifulMosaics]

I have bipolar disorder and the depression gets so debilitating. For over a month all I could do was curl up in a ball on the floor with our dog or sleep until 3pm. There was a span of over 2 weeks when I didn't shower or change my clothes. I had a glimmer of hope when my sn arrived in the mail three and a half weeks ago but my husband threw it out. I finally called my psychiatrist and told her I needed to be voluntarily committed just to get help. She said no, what I really needed was Ketamine infusions. We talked about Ketamine before but she never actually told me that I needed to get it. It was hard to force myself to go to the evaluation visit. I was a mess. Now that I've had four of my six treatments I really notice a huge difference. It makes me wonder why I take nine different medications a day and still go into deep depressions when one drug pulled me out of it. I don't know how long this feeling will last. I still have two treatments left and then maintenance treatments afterwards. I know I'm lucky because my insurance covers the doctor's visit portion of the treatment and I just have to pay for the actual drug itself. It's not super expensive, $225 per infusion, but I know it is more than many can afford. So for now I'm not exactly happy (I don't know if I ever was) but at least I'm not curled up in a ball on the floor.

How often are the infusions? Ngl I kinda laughed when you said they're "not super expensive". However I'm glad you've found this difference maker. I would definitely try it if I could afford it.

 

[onlyanimalsaregood]

@Apathy's Girl any update?

 

[come to dust]

I have done k recreationally many times. unfortunately i still want ctb despite that.