Discussion Guilt of being mentally ill

[sgifeei]

This is just a vent post.
Some of you might relate, some wont.
But I feel so much guilt because of everything Ive put my family through.
I dont go to university, I skip classes, lie to my parents.
Right now I am sitting in a caffe, not being able to move, while the class is going on.
Professors are getting sick of me leaving early.
Parents are tired of me probably, even though they never say it.
My doctor is away on a sick leave for a month, so I cannot contact her, and I dont want to because she is sick and I feel like I would be a burden by texting her.
My meds that she put me on arent working anymore, I guess because my body got used to it, so my anxiety is back
I am suck a fucking burden to this planet.
I have no one right now, so please, if you see this, type something. Anything.
Advice, your story.
I just want to feel heard right now.

 

[Namelesa]

I will say you don't have to feel any guilt for any of this. You were forced into this world and whatever pain you are dealing with so it isn't your fault. Education can be really stressful and draining (it was for me, as I couldn't handle school at all.) Its awful there isn't another doctor to support you through this when you deserve help for the struggle you are going through. Sadly medications aren't a long term fix sometimes and can be useless, I had medication for being able to sleep and calm myself more but my body gets used to it making those useless.