I got my SN. I'm so ready to go, but I'm unsure that it's a peaceful way out. Read through everything under the sun on the site. I can care less about the taste, rapid heart rate, nausea, vomiting or any of that. But these side effects that some people reported of the ears ringing, losing eye sight completely, waking up after a couple of hours like everything is fine and you feel like you got hit by a bus just sounds horrific. I also found a picture of a deceased patient from SN and it was just awful. Obviously you aren't going to look like roses dead but good god this guy was just blue all over the place, looked as if he was locked into a freezer. I had to get this off my chest. This endless searching through this forum is such a roller coaster. Anybody else is struggling with this?
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lost1
Member
- Sep 14, 2022
- 63
Awww I'm so sorry for you and thank you for sharing. I too am struggling I can relate to what your going through but I think it relatively painless peacefull and quick but still don't make it easier. Don't help us when we over think over search things over read things...... my thoughts are with you your not alone 
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TydalWave
Brutally Self-Aware
- Sep 20, 2022
- 436
I've felt the same way... It is hard to tell the difference between the misinformation, misuse and the experiences of those who actually use SN per the guide. The ambiguity makes this decision much more difficult as nobody knows what to expect when you haven't seen it first hand. But, there are a lot of experiences from people on here who have been able to watch first hand that indicate it is a relatively peaceful way out.
reading all the goodbye threads and from what i read online it's one of the more peaceful methods. i wish you luck and peace.
Zegers
Enlightened
- Dec 15, 2021
- 1,758
SN is peaceful -as far as can be expected- is not N but is peaceful and if you do it properly you will leave.
Godspeed
Godspeed
Tired_again
Member
- Sep 16, 2022
- 12
I wouldnt be too worried how you look after ctb if you are worried for family sake. Morticians can easily make you look better. They deal with plenty of worse cases
toasterbath
.
- Jun 26, 2022
- 254
i could care less about looking like a smurf because i'll be dead. none of it will even matter anymore. people die in freak accidents and leave behind worse looking corpses.
Lost Magic
Illuminated
- May 5, 2020
- 3,201
A lot of people who fail have either been found and saved, haven't taken enough, it's not pure enough or haven't followed the protocol properly. Plus, does it really matter if you look blue? Corpses aren't supposed to be beautiful haha. Dead is dead.
rationaltake
I'm rocking it - in another universe
- Sep 28, 2021
- 2,707
I'm thinking there's a sweet spot inbetween impulsivity and over-thinking. Still trying to find it...
FuneralCry
Just wanting some peace
- Sep 24, 2020
- 42,517
To me SN doesn't sound as bad as many of the other methods and so many people have succeeded with it after all. It's a reliable method. I don't really see the point of looking at pictures of dead bodies. We simply wouldn't be there so we couldn't possibly be affected by how our bodies look like after we die.
I wish you freedom from suffering.
I wish you freedom from suffering.
Yea I'm definitely on the over thinking side of things.
The corpse was not the point here just the thing as a whole seems a lot more on the uneasy side than people make it out to be.
rationaltake
I'm rocking it - in another universe
- Sep 28, 2021
- 2,707
I feel the same. It's the tachycardia worries me. I'm dubious about propanolol personally as I want to take as few meds as possible. I'm not used to meds and don't know what my reaction is likely to be. I was giddy on one sip of Bailey's recently!!!
I question all methods to some extent. It's okay to be nervous, this is a big decision after all. What helps me is hearing the success stories and knowing what the failed attempts got wrong. Plus death is rarely ever wholly peaceful. In comparison to other methods SN is tame and for that I am thankful.
