Goodbye lads

[First loss]

If you dont hear from me anymore, consider me dead. Fuck this life and everything. It is nothing but failure and suffering.

 

[throwaway777]

i wish u peace whatever u choose.. hugs

 

[AhG]

I hope you find what you need in the end. Peace be with you mate!

 

[First loss]

fucking hell everything and this si i cant fucking stand it I Almos fucking passed out fucking hell why cant I just die i need a gun or somethingg

 

[GameIsSkewed]

fucking hell everything and this si i cant fucking stand it I Almos fucking passed out fucking hell why cant I just die i need a gun or somethingg

It is the ultimate test of self dominion, don't be surprised it is hellishly hard, but be reminded that there is nothing new in death as there is nothing new in life, it has be going on for much longer than you and me and it's absolutely natural.

 

[CelestialSky]

I know the feeling. The SI kicks in when you genuinely want nothing more than to be gone from the world! I wish you peace in whatever happens.

 

[First loss]

It is the ultimate test of self dominion, don't be surprised it is hellishly hard, but be reminded that there is nothing new in death as there is nothing new in life, it has be going on for much longer than you and me and it's absolutely natural.

How do I avoid it? I smoked a couple of cigarettes and I am kinda normal again. I had a suicidal episode. I just want to end it. Now I am stuck with this nasty rope marks on my neck and I have to wear a fucking hoodie to hide it. Damn it.

 

[ForgottenSara]

If there's an afterlife, I'm sure we'll meet there in the next two weeks.
Peace.

 

[First loss]

I know the feeling. The SI kicks in when you genuinely want nothing more than to be gone from the world! I wish you peace in whatever happens.

True. I was so close and I just HAD to stand up. I didn't control my body anymore.

 

[CelestialSky]

True. I was so close and I just HAD to stand up. I didn't control my body anymore.

Same thing happened to me today. I finally found my sweet spot yesterday and had my set up all ready. Today I really tried for ages with the set up, and couldn't get it again. Or when I did, I'd stand up because the feeling of passing out scared me. I WISH I could get a gun here too, one push and you're gone. Sending hugs.

 

[GameIsSkewed]

How do I avoid it? I smoked a couple of cigarettes and I am kinda normal again. I had a suicidal episode. I just want to end it. Now I am stuck with this nasty rope marks on my neck and I have to wear a fucking hoodie to hide it. Damn it.

There is a thing in the brain called amygdala that is responsible for quck stress responses when the front brain(the rational part that mostly makes us human) can't overpower it, or the situation demands quick action that rationality can't pick up and brain takes over. Unfortunately you can't shut it off, it's "hard wired" in a sense. Navy seals for example do extensive trainings to minimise as much as possible this part of the brain responsible for panic responses.