tilldeathdousapart

tilldeathdousapart

Member
Apr 28, 2023
5
Hey guys. I'm a 19yo dude from India from a fairly privileged family from India. We all have pretty bad undiagnosed mental issues due to which we end up hurting each other a lot too often. Funny thing is both my parents are doctors lol.
Anyway, I was given a chance to move abroad to Canada for university but my ADHD and Autism was finally diagnosed there and I had a really bad meltdown due to which I went into a depressive state for all of my time there and ended up isolating myself really bad and losing all of my friends and going down a spiral due to which I had to drop out and come back only to realize that I have given up my only shot at a decent life. I have been back for about 4 months now and I regret my decision more and more and today is the day I finally give up on life. Y'all. have been a great support for my last days and I will be attempting in about 10 minutes. Godspeed.
 
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Sittichmutter

Sittichmutter

Student
Sep 16, 2021
164
You are too Young. I Hope you think about it more and give yourself a second chance.
I wish you love, child.❤️
 
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gizzreid

gizzreid

spence
Apr 26, 2023
140
i'm so sorry. i'm 19 with autism and ADHD too so i understand. this world was not built for people like us, having to conform to everyone else's standards to live just makes us so much more unhappy i wonder if it's even worth it. i wish you luck with whatever path you take.
 
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Rocket

Rocket

Member
Oct 12, 2022
60
Heartbreaking to read your message, thank you for sharing your story. You are clearly a bright guy having been admitted to uni, no reason you can't do that again once you've had some time to heal more. Respect your decisions but there's never a rush.

Blessings and peace to you. :heart:
 
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N

NorthernMonkey

Student
Apr 6, 2023
120
Hey guys. I'm a 19yo dude from India from a fairly privileged family from India. We all have pretty bad undiagnosed mental issues due to which we end up hurting each other a lot too often. Funny thing is both my parents are doctors lol.
Anyway, I was given a chance to move abroad to Canada for university but my ADHD and Autism was finally diagnosed there and I had a really bad meltdown due to which I went into a depressive state for all of my time there and ended up isolating myself really bad and losing all of my friends and going down a spiral due to which I had to drop out and come back only to realize that I have given up my only shot at a decent life. I have been back for about 4 months now and I regret my decision more and more and today is the day I finally give up on life. Y'all. have been a great support for my last days and I will be attempting in about 10 minutes. Godspeed.
You haven't given up your only shot at a decent life, just one of them. You will have other chances and opportunities if you want them. It feels like the end now but only if you want it to be. It feels like you are being pushed into this decision. I wish you well, whatever you decide. ❤️
 
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B

betternever2havbeen

Paragon
Jun 19, 2022
932
You're only 19 there is so much time to turn things around. This can just be a temporary set-back. Ok so you had a MH crisis for a few months, it feels bad right now but I really think you should wait and not make a permanent decision like this. That's my opinion but it's your life.
 
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tilldeathdousapart

tilldeathdousapart

Member
Apr 28, 2023
5
I cannot bring myself to jump with the noose around my neck. Too triggering.I'll try again soon.
 
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TraumaEscapee:)

TraumaEscapee:)

I hate my birth family
Apr 30, 2023
210
I cannot bring myself to jump with the noose around my neck. Too triggering.I'll try again soon.
We're all here if you want to chat. I have aspergers and I'm 23 =)
 
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Rocket

Rocket

Member
Oct 12, 2022
60
Thanks again for writing here. There is a lot of support and people want to help. Reach out to talk about anything. You're a beautiful soul.
 
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L

Letgo

Specialist
Apr 1, 2023
320
Take your time and rest. You don't have to do anything today / tonight. Thinking about you.
 
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tilldeathdousapart

tilldeathdousapart

Member
Apr 28, 2023
5
Hey I had scheduled emails to my loved ones and left a note on the balcony on which I was planning to hang myself. I couldn't bring myself to do it. Undid all of that and I'm now in bed thinking about what went so wrong in my life.
i'm so sorry. i'm 19 with autism and ADHD too so i understand. this world was not built for people like us, having to conform to everyone else's standards to live just makes us so much more unhappy i wonder if it's even worth it. i wish you luck with whatever path you take.
Man I hate mental illness this stuff really makes life worthless. Anyway, when were u diagnosed?
You haven't given up your only shot at a decent life, just one of them. You will have other chances and opportunities if you want them. It feels like the end now but only if you want it to be. It feels like you are being pushed into this decision. I wish you well, whatever you decide. ❤️
I see where you're coming from, but I don't think it will be this easy for me to keep living and make better decisions in life. You see, I keep forgetting how something made me feel at a point of time which is why I keep repeating the same mistakes, Plus I have crippling anxiety from not being in touch with people for more than a year now and I feel like I'm a hundred times more awkward now.
Take your time and rest. You don't have to do anything today / tonight. Thinking about you.
Thanks for the kind words. I really appreciate it.
Thanks again for writing here. There is a lot of support and people want to help. Reach out to talk about anything. You're a beautiful soul.
Thank you so much
N
We're all here if you want to chat. I have aspergers and I'm 23 =)
that's tough, when were u diagnosed
 
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N

NorthernMonkey

Student
Apr 6, 2023
120
I see where you're coming from, but I don't think it will be this easy for me to keep living and make better decisions in life. You see, I keep forgetting how something made me feel at a point of time which is why I keep repeating the same mistakes, Plus I have crippling anxiety from not being in touch with people for more than a year now and I feel like I'm a hundred times more awkward now.
It won't be easy, it isn't easy for most of us. Most people repeat mistakes, it's very rare that we learn our lesson first time. The anxiety and feeling awkward are totally normal feelings. There isn't anything fundamentally wrong with you, you are just finding your way in life. I promise you, what you are feeling is normal, I expect everyone here can relate and have gone through, or are going through, similar issues. When we feel like we are doing everything wrong and nothing is going right In our lives, it's easy to feel alone, and that nobody has ever fucked up as badly as we have. Plenty of people have screwed up just as badly and to be honest, much worse. Try not to be so hard on yourself, you are not a mistake, you are not a disaster of a human, you are perfectly normal and are doing your best. Give yourself a break, try to get some rest, the world and its problems can wait for a little while ❤️
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
38,945
I certainly hate how difficult it is to finally leave this world but anyway I wish you the best with your plans. Life really is so unnecessarily cruel so it's very much understandable wishing to be free from all the suffering that existing brings.
 

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