going to do it.

[planchette]

hi. my nickname is mae. i couldnt even last long enough to pick out a cute pfp for this site haha
i didnt do my assignments to give myself more of a reason go to. i bet that this attempt will fail. its my first one. but i dont care, ill try and try and keep on trying until i succeed. couldn't even do that for other tasks.
i wish i was a kid again in mom and dad's arms. i dont have a bad relationship with them, i know they love me, but i cant stand being so useless and dependent on them.
im waiting for my older brother to leave the kitchen so i can get the pills. i love my brother, even if i dont show it. i know he cares about me and i feel bad trying to leave like this.
i just heard his leave the kitchen, im going to get the pills now.
i got them! acetaminophen and two random bottles. i know this wont work. i know i will regret this later but i cannot bring myself to care. i left a note that im almost done writing. i know my computer will be checked, so i deleted all my prior browsing data. i'll erase this forum from my browsing history once im done.
im so scared, but i cant help but smile at this. my first attempt, who knows, maybe it will be the last because i get better, maybe because i die.
im going to take the pills soon then fall asleep reading. who knows if i will wake up.
it is almost three in the morning, i have school today. goodbye, i know i will be back soon if this doesnt work, which it likely wont. goodbye for now.

 

[overcomingfear]

not a good idea. gonna end up in a hospital probably and everyone will know you're suicidal. either u do it seriously or not at all imo

 

[VIBRITANNIA]

i'm late, but like overcomingfear said, an overdose isn't the most reliable method, and will lead to others knowing you're suicidal, which could lead to them restricting what things you have access to.

ctb is a big decision. if you're going to make this decision, there has to be lots of thought, research, and planning put into this decision. that's not to say that you haven't done the thinking, but everybody needs to do research even if they don't.

you haven't logged on since you made this thread. i'm assuming you're in the hospital, so i really do hope you read this if you get the chance.

 

[planchette]

i'm late, but like overcomingfear said, an overdose isn't the most reliable method, and will lead to others knowing you're suicidal, which could lead to them restricting what things you have access to.

ctb is a big decision. if you're going to make this decision, there has to be lots of thought, research, and planning put into this decision. that's not to say that you haven't done the thinking, but everybody needs to do research even if they don't.

you haven't logged on since you made this thread. i'm assuming you're in the hospital, so i really do hope you read this if you get the chance.

i went to the hospital and was fine, my prents already knew i was depressed so it didnt really make much difference. i did this impulsively so i didnt really think much about it and i'm honestly not doing myself any good by going back onto this forum, but just wanted to reply back.

i went to the hospital and was fine, my prents already knew i was depressed so it didnt really make much difference. i did this impulsively so i didnt really think much about it and i'm honestly not doing myself any good by going back onto this forum, but just wanted to reply back.

also sorry abt shitty formatting on mobile but i just wanted to say i got send to psychiatric for a week after this post

 

[maybepossiblyithink]

How are you doing, physically?