Venting Getting closer

[rotten]

Yesterday wasn't the best day. They made me talk about my "life goals" and college. I answered honestly and even tried to seem excited about it. I've been trying to live, I really have been. The fact that I can even talk about goals is major. But obviously this means nothing to them. They just got angry and said coding is for losers who never leave the house. Ok.

I know that whatever I do I'll never be enough for them, but it still hurts. The isolation has been stronger than ever and shows no signs of letting up. I know they'll still treat me like shit and punch me for showing emotion. Yet a part of me is still attached to them in a sick way. Anytime I approach the door, I never have the guts to walk out because I fear what might happen.

Later that evening she beat called him every name in the book. I know he's always been her minion but I couldn't stand to see him so broken down. As much as I hate to admit it, he's a lot like me in an unfortunate way. He hates that this is the life he's been sentenced to. There's no real way out of it....well there's one way. And he screams about it once she tears him up enough.

I would hate to grow old and miserable like this. Everyday things like this replay in my head and god it kills me. I know I'm screwed though because everytime I think of it I need to put a hole in my wall. I miss my apathy.

 

[Morituri_Te_Salutant]

They just got angry and said coding is for losers who never leave the house. Ok.

This - right here - is the reason why I almost never reveal my goals or aim in life unless the person is trustworthy, supportive and a positive influence. Things that are very difficult to find in one package on the modern world. :)

Also, jokes on them - the popular line of work these days require you to learn how to code or work with computers. Good luck finding any job if you don't know either.

Sorry you had to deal with such terrible people, though.

 

[rotten]

This - right here - is the reason why I almost never reveal my goals or aim in life unless the person is trustworthy, supportive and a positive influence. Things that are very difficult to find in one package on the modern world. :)

Also, jokes on them - the popular line of work these days require you to learn how to code or work with computers. Good luck finding any job if you don't know either.

Sorry you had to deal with such terrible people, though.

Thanks. Yeah these were relatives too.

 

[LunarPyotr]

This - right here - is the reason why I almost never reveal my goals or aim in life unless the person is trustworthy, supportive and a positive influence.

Yeah, I had one friend who aimed to produce music and people, specially teacher told them that if he doesn't learn good enough, he'll ride around in a trash truck instead of producing music.
This only caused him to just not go to school at some point, till the moment where police was wasting their time to pick them up and drive to school.
The same shit happened later on when he unwillingly got send to a gov assigned job finding program, where I was too since I couldn't really find a job back then, since I was living in a small village : P

Now he's changing jobs like at least 4 times a year and he's also kinda earning money with his songs on Spotify but it's not enough to even buy some audio equipment.

The same shit was also with me but I used to be a rebel back in the last 2 years of my school "prison" and didn't gave a fck about those people.
They told me that it's just unrealistic, that I should not have such big expectations and one teacher even made jokes about me in front of the class.
But less they know, I ended up working for the biggest ISP in Germany and of those sums even were speechless when I came to install their DSL modems and had my Telekom AG uniform on.

Hehe, what did you filthy mouth said again? My dreams/goals were unrealistic?
Guess what, I have here a certain lyrics for you. I hope you know what I think about you Mr. Be*****