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Deleted member 14386

I am not advising anything
Jan 28, 2020
784
Aye I'm fucked. I did something bad, not in my eyes but law-eyes and I'm fuuuuhhcked.. Been spending most of my time drunk off my ass or xannied up (yeah I relapsed too), I get panic attacks and wanna end it, which also isn't allowed.
Holy fuck how do they expect me to effing leave?!!? Let me commit a crime then die!! ctb'ing is illegal anyway (where I live)

Any lawyers here? Can you dm me? Kinda freaking out
 
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Brink

Brink

Exhausted. RadHomo.
Feb 11, 2020
625
Hello @drowinginsorrowww, sorry to hear you're freaking out. Can't say I'm a lawyer (or anything professional for that matter), but I wonder the nature of your criminal activity?
 
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D

Deleted member 14386

I am not advising anything
Jan 28, 2020
784
Hello, it is ordering benzos and pregabalin for my own (dependence-based use, I can't go a day without the shakes and sweats) activity, I do not sell them since I know the benzos all too well, they're worse than H. Anyway a letter reached my gp saying I am planning to sell these benzos since I am planning to buy to avoid potential seizures, 30mg diazepam daily, 1x10mg tabs every 8 hours also 60mg pregabalin every 8 hours. Everything was cut off, including my thiamine and folic acid, anti-depressants (mirtazapine 30mg/daily)

So 30mg Diaz , 180mg Pregab/ daily, I now have to buy illegally. I was prescribed these at some point in 2017 I think, since 2015 UK guidelines have changed (so I've been told) and I felt like I had to buy them (a guy at one of my groups died trying to CT off just alcohol, 7.5% 9Litres/daily which I get is strong. But he was pressured into it by his family an died.) It's all just worrying that the docs have no idea what they're doing.
 
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GoodPersonEffed

GoodPersonEffed

Brevity is my middle name, but my name was TL
Jan 11, 2020
6,727
So it I'm understanding this correctly, someone is trying to fuck with you by sending a letter to your doctor. LE is not involved. Did your doctor show you the letter? I don't know the laws in your country, but in many countries, the patient has the right to request copies of anything in their medical record.

Seems like the worst thing right now is that your meds are being cut off, and that someone is acting as your enemy and wants you shaken up. If you had no plans to sell the meds, and there's no proof that you were in the process of setting up the means to do so, then the worst thing you've done is buy. But it doesn't sound like there are any legal threats for buying, only for selling, which you say you weren't going to do.
 
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D

Deleted member 14386

I am not advising anything
Jan 28, 2020
784
So it I'm understanding this correctly, someone is trying to fuck with you by sending a letter to your doctor. LE is not involved. Did your doctor show you the letter? I don't know the laws in your country, but in many countries, the patient has the right to request copies of anything in their medical record.

Seems like the worst thing right now is that your meds are being cut off, and that someone is acting as your enemy and wants you shaken up. If you had no plans to sell the meds, and there's no proof that you were in the process of setting up the means to do so, then the worst thing you've done is buy. But it doesn't sound like there are any legal threats for buying, only for selling, which you say you weren't going to do.
Mate it's so fucked (dunno if your a guy or girl but same same), basically its already happened. I now have to illegally buy the meds they got me hooked on.

I said I might have to buy the prescription illegally if I were to get cut-off the script (due to potential physical seizures and also that I was prescribed and dependent for 8 years), but not to my GP (I live in UK), I told a random drug-worker that while she was laughing along playing the bait game.

This part-time shitty drug worker who I know nothing about and vice-versa sent the letter to my GP.

Yes my GP (my Dr) showed me the letter saying I was intending to buy benzos and then sell them, I had initially come in to my GP to ask for a continuing script since I moved house, but had to register and all that, that's fine. The words that came out of her mouth though were horrifying
Doc"Listen Mr 'Your full name', it's not gonna happen"
"huh? Why?"
Doc"There's a letter saying you intend to sell these"
"What? Why? Where did it come from?"
Doc*turns the screen toward me* I see this shitty drug-worker had written a 'concerned letter' to the NHS spine (contains all medical data on all UK citizens [I used to work with it and it's ridiculously easy to hack, anyways])
"No no that must be a misunderstanding" (I'm paraphrasing)
Doc "Nope it says right here that you intend to sell benzos"
"Well I would buy them if I ran out, to prevent seizures y'know?"
Doc "Listen Mr "full name". It's not gonna happen."
"but why? I was prescribed these before, for the same problem."
Doc "It's. Not. Going. To. Happen."
Then I started flipping out, I'm male and it was a female locum dr, not my actual GP since he retired, also I knew him and we had mutual trust.

I know a lot about benzos and drugs in general, docs do not like when you know more about a subject than they think they do. I was not physically but mentally trying to fuck her rhythm up, I just got caught up in my emotions.
The only things on my medical record are self harm, suicidal ideation (obviously lol), depression, panic attacks/extreme anxiety, bad sleep bad food etc etc. Nothing dangerous or illegal, I've never even been caught with weed. It doesn't matter what I tell them they've already had a letter from a 'legit source' that I am trying to steal scripts from them.

But since I trusted them and told them I had a problem I became a criminal (which I am, but not like serious crime), now there is no script and I have to buy at ridiculous prices on the darknet.
Hope that made sense, my brain is fried.
edit: No LE involved. They actually kinda took pity on me lol
edit2: Proof does not matter if you are a criminal. I could come in with stacks of paperwork and they'd push me right out the door
 
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F

Final Escape

I’ve been here too long
Jul 8, 2018
4,348
I'm so glad I came off all my meds that's all I can say lol! It's too much hassle the worry about withdrawal. I feel fine off it all. My life sucks but I'm much more sane off all the drugs with the exception of light weed and couple cups of coffee. Sorry u are in this mess. Maybe should go into emergency room for supervised detox unless u can get these meds another way to remain on them. Or extreme gradual taper if u have enough of it left. That is scary to get meds cut off like that. It might be deadly if u cannot taper. Meaning it could increase suicidal ideation and negative destructive thoughts when in bad withdrawal.
 
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GoodPersonEffed

GoodPersonEffed

Brevity is my middle name, but my name was TL
Jan 11, 2020
6,727
If LE doesn't care, then I don't see why you need a lawyer. Who would they represent you against? The drug worker? Because you were libeled, and it's in your NHS record and affecting your treatment options.

It seems to me like your options are to buy the meds illegally, which is expensive, or to try to get off of them. But first I think you need to take some time to calm down and talk yourself though this, as you're freaking out over this and it seems to feel way bigger than it is. That will pass. I don't know when, but it will. So I suggest you give yourself some distance from this because it still feels immediate and powerful, which has power over you that isn't merited and is pushing you to think and act in ways that don't serve you, ways you wouldn't be acting if you felt in control and aware of everything that's happening. I think you're hyperfocusing on a few details and they're blown up bigger than they are, and that keeps you from being aware of what else is happening, and of the actual proportions of things.

That's my opinion. Take what you want from it, discard what you don't.
 
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E

ebt88

Student
Jun 11, 2020
188
You say proof doesn't matter if you're a criminal but you have no record. I don't think they can process you unless a tangible proof exists like you taking to a potential customer or something.
 
D

Deleted member 14386

I am not advising anything
Jan 28, 2020
784
You say proof doesn't matter if you're a criminal but you have no record. I don't think they can process you unless a tangible proof exists like you taking to a potential customer or something.
Sorry I meant proof doesn't matter if you are looking for help in the medical field. They just say I could have faked it or whatever. The proof is in the exact wording I gave to the person who sent the letter to the GP/NHS Spine, which does not exist, what does exist is her interpretation of my words, which I admit, might have given her the wrong idea. It's like I've got a bad credit score for my whole life (not long to be fair) but in terms of medical data and lying, and I can't discuss or debate it.
So I suggest you give yourself some distance from this because it still feels immediate and powerful, which has power over you that isn't merited and is pushing you to think and act in ways that don't serve you, ways you wouldn't be acting if you felt in control and aware of everything that's happening.
You are right. I am panicking. I am not acting rationally. I am acting on emotion. Thank you. I will step back and watch the crazy thoughts go past and meditate. Also smoke a fat blunt.
 
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