Venting FUCKING HATE

[Flau]

mKkakJIiaiIJJSJDJJSIANWBWHAUAB I feel SO aggressive.

im breathing i swear.


I've been tormented mentally recently every single day. I feel like I'm about to either kill myself in the most painful way possible or kill people that hurt me.

Family... More like a sect. I'm sleeping 3 hours a day, working, cleaning, babysitting, i don't eat well, I'm being harrased, i don't have money and everything i have is taken away from me. On top of that these people brainwash me and manipulate me on daily basis into being responsible for their shit with a great feeling of guilt.


I hate everyone. I hate everything.
This life is a joke. Prove me wrong.

MEANWHILE I HATE THIS SHI I CANT LIVE LIKE THIS ANYMORE I HAVE NO VOICE IN THIS HPUSE I CANT LEAVE I CANT DO ANYTHINGNGNGNGNTN
I FEEL LIKE MURDERING THEM EVERY SINGLE LIVING MOMENT OF MY MISERABLE LIFE
I CANNOT LOOK THEM IN THE FACE ANYMORE I JUST FEEL THE RAGE WITHIN MY THEETH CLENCH MY HANDS ARE SHAKING I WANT TO BUST THEM OPEN I HATE IT HATE IT HATE IR HATEITHAIETAHIETAHAHTAAHSBJSKAKKSJXJKAJSIXJWHBSIZBSOJA






.... Ill just go. Exhale. Swallow it up and be a doormat. That's why they gave birth to me anyway.

 

[Makko]

Let the hatred flow through you

 

[Midgardsorm]

Let the hatred flow through you

Such evil ...

 

[summers]

@Flau please make sure you're using tor or a VPN when you post about killing people. I'm sure they deserve it, but I don't want the cops to come to your house for you when you're the one being abused.

And @Midgardsorm that's not evil, that's what happens when you push someone to their breaking point.

 

[OnlyTheWind]

I can't imagine what you must be going through. It sounds like hell. I don't want to tell you that CTB is the only way out, but that's my gut feeling here if you truly have no other choice. I'm not an optimist by any stretch of the imagination.

 

[logan]

You must somehow manage to break out of this vicious circle in order to regain your composure.

In such a state of emergency you cannot make clear decisions.

Maybe you have someone in your environment with whom you can talk about it.

 

[9BBN]

That sounds so painful I'm so sorry. I relate to being brainwashed, it fucks you up and gaslights you in the process.

 

[WitheringAway]

That all sounds so horrible!! im sorry life brought you such misery. It must have been very hard to battle the urge to kill them every single moment of the day. May I ask why it's not an option for you to break free away from them once and for all? Maybe look for a job whatever it is and rent a room somewhere? Tbh if I was in your situation I think I'd rather be homeless than live with a constant torment

 

[Flau]

That all sounds so horrible!! im sorry life brought you such misery. It must have been very hard to battle the urge to kill them every single moment of the day. May I ask why it's not an option for you to break free away from them once and for all? Maybe look for a job whatever it is and rent a room somewhere? Tbh if I was in your situation I think I'd rather be homeless than live with a constant torment

Ive tried having a job, they just forcefully take my money. The rest of my family justifies it as "oh they are your parents, they raised you, it's about time you help THEM out". I'm not even old enough to be able to keep up with sponsoring my parents.
And me moving/leaving the house for even an hour causes me a lot of things. The toss my room, my personal things, they throw my things away that i kept close it's just.... Bad.

 

[logan]

Ive tried having a job, they just forcefully take my money. The rest of my family justifies it as "oh they are your parents, they raised you, it's about time you help THEM out". I'm not even old enough to be able to keep up with sponsoring my parents.
And me moving/leaving the house for even an hour causes me a lot of things. The toss my room, my personal things, they throw my things away that i kept close it's just.... Bad.

And what are you doing now?

 

[FuneralCry]

I'm sorry you are stuck in this situation, it sounds really awful. People can be so cruel and I cannot imagine what it must be like. I wish you well, I hope you can find some sort of relief from what you are going through.