Venting Fuck Therapy I Want Revenge

[Spectre]

I can in no way relate to people who use adversity to become a better person. I am constantly furious and am only ever able to calm down by using Zopiclone and sleeping medications to induce sleep. I want revenge on those people, their loved ones and everything they ever care about. I don't want to "talk about it" with some funny doctor, I want REVENGE. If I ever get out of this and into recovery I swear to become the most cruel, vindictive, evil hearted, problematic and self-interested person alive. Being a good person has gotten me nowhere and all I want right now is to hurt as many people as possible and cruelly as possible.

Reading that back I recognize it was really edgy and kinda cringe but I still feel exactly that way. This world was not designed for good people and I think I've finally gotten that message.

 

[GuessWhosBack]

Revenge for what?

 

[Marine]

I personally believe in positive revenge as the most effective but I get more angry as I haven't successfully pulled it off yet with time and injustices keeps being perpetrated against me. So I understand the feeling, but I also understand how morality and freedom work.

Evil never leads to anything good for anybody and is not the nature of the world either, it's an unnecessary condition we must get out of, but justified revenge is not evil, it can be self defense. But just being bad will make you suffer beyond even this life and won't save you.

I would say that balance is key.

 

[Lady Laudanum]

I totally get it.

When my dad has another health crisis (which he inevitably will, he's getting old and has major pre-existing issues), it'll be easy to convince my mom to keep him alive no matter what. So he'll be suffering in intensive care with tubes everywhere. He stole my childhood so I'm going to steal his right to die with dignity. And people who know my mom are going to see me as a good and filial daughter who doesn't want to let go of her dad.

If I told this to anyone I know in real life, they would be absolutely horrified. There are only 2 people in this world who I know will understand, and one of them put up boundaries against me because I lashed out at them when I was drunk and high.

 

[derpyderpins]

 

[permanently tired]

Success is supposedly the best revenge

 

[derpyderpins]

Success is supposedly the best revenge

True, but I don't think this is a thread looking for logic haha.

It's funny how success can drive people up a wall. It's much better to be happy for others when things go well.

 

[Spectre]

Revenge for what?

If I told you that you might be able to figure out who I really am and then they'll see this post and use it in court if I ever try something, yadda yadda yadda. Best for me to keep it vague.

Success is supposedly the best revenge

This just sounds like something ancient kings and prophets came up with to keep the crime rate low

 

[GuessWhosBack]

If I told you that you might be able to figure out who I really am and then they'll see this post and use it in court if I ever try something, yadda yadda yadda. Best for me to keep it vague.

I get it. I asked because idk what was done to you to feel this way, so I hope your feeling of revenge is justifiable.

 

[Lady Laudanum]

Success is supposedly the best revenge

No, revenge is the best success

 

[GuessWhosBack]

No, revenge is the best success

Trying to live the happiest version of your life is good too, I hear.. If that implies you have to let a few screws loose once in a while.. then so be it.

 

[permanently tired]

This just sounds like something ancient kings and prophets came up with to keep the crime rate low

Maybe. Depends on if you want to tear your enemies down or rise above them. Either way you'll level the field.

 

[Lady Laudanum]

Trying to live the happiest version of your life is good too, I hear.. If that implies you have to let a few screws loose once in a while.. then so be it.

The funniest part is that people are going to think I'm a good person, for doing something that is incredibly evil and unethical. But that's on them for not learning more about how the healthcare system works.

 

[permanently tired]

True, but I don't think this is a thread looking for logic haha.

It's funny how success can drive people up a wall. It's much better to be happy for others when things go well.

Perhaps try a rage room?

 

[escape_from_hell]

This world was not designed for good people and I think I've finally gotten that message.

I have the experience that the only periods where life has treated me well have been those times I was an absolutely amoral piece of selfish shit with little regard for others. Not talking about something like selfishness leading to better self-care. Talking about external luck, serendipity. Things like more opportunities, money, willing sexual partners, people loving and caring about me deeply and genuinely, less physical pain, the whole nine.

The more caring, moral, and good-natured periods are marked by being loathed, mistreated, disregarded, invisible, horrible luck, poor value for efforts made, physical sickness and ailments, that sort of thing.

This is purely anecdotal and I don't want to encourage magical thinking, but I have occasionally read similar experiences from others--where periods of actively being a bad apple yielded a far more loving and rich life than the straight and narrow. So yeah, I don't want to say there is some mystical stuff going on but my own lived experiences have illustrated pretty clearly that the nature of being (itself a mystical mystery) is geared towards EVIL. Maybe the life lesson we are supposed to take is to be as evil as possible, as that is what nature rewards? Then the only pain is moral pain, the tears of which can be wiped away with the hundred dollar bills like the top of the top do.

 

[derpyderpins]

Maybe. Depends on if you want to tear your enemies down or rise above them. Either way you'll level the field.

Keep the trees equal with hatchet, axe, and saw

 

[invisiblesuffering]

like hurting innocent people? Being selfish doesn't mean being bad. And not being selfish doesn't mean good. You can be the most selfish person and put yourself first always and willing to hurt anyone who want to hurt you. it doesn't have to be hurting innocent people. It just mean that not letting anyone ever hurt you. People have the wrong idea of what it means to be good or bad. Its not bad being selfish and getting revenge on awful people and not being a victim anymore. Just be careful not hurt anyone who doesn't deserve to get hurt.

 

[mythofsisyphus]

I think the harsh reality is, what you've described is the opposite of revenge. Clearly someone or something has hurt you deeply, and I'm so sorry. Life is so incredibly cruel and unfair. It's so natural to want to revenge, to become bitter and resentful, I get it completely. But is that what you, the you underneath all the hurt and trauma, would want? I'm not suggesting the alternative is you become a 'better' person, that you use the pain to reach enlightenment and be transformed. In many ways, this would be doing the same thing as seeking revenge - not wanting the feelings you have, wanting to get rid of them and turn them into something else.

Maybe there's another way.. maybe these people have already taken enough from you. Maybe you can find a way to exist with the pain, without needing to channel it into revenge or self improvement, carrying it with you but not letting it define you and what's important to you. Before all this happened, what did you value? What mattered? Can you find a way back to these things, in some way.

I'm a weird way, I think letting go of your need for revenge, is possibly the best revenge you can get.

 

[JaegerCA]

When I hated someone, I went to the gym and got stronger than them, then waited for a excuse to beat them up. Never happened, but it's a nice goal.

 

[etherealgoddess]

I can in no way relate to people who use adversity to become a better person. I am constantly furious and am only ever able to calm down by using Zopiclone and sleeping medications to induce sleep. I want revenge on those people, their loved ones and everything they ever care about. I don't want to "talk about it" with some funny doctor, I want REVENGE. If I ever get out of this and into recovery I swear to become the most cruel, vindictive, evil hearted, problematic and self-interested person alive. Being a good person has gotten me nowhere and all I want right now is to hurt as many people as possible and cruelly as possible.

Reading that back I recognize it was really edgy and kinda cringe but I still feel exactly that way. This world was not designed for good people and I think I've finally gotten that message.

I have done revenge, and sometimes, it's good. I had a so-called friend spread all of my most personal information, so I did the exact same thing back to her so everyone found out about all of her business, told other people about her tendency to lie, humiliated her online, and not only that, I even confronted her online but was smart enough to leave out enough details so she didn't know how much I knew, so she ended up going to my face to confront me and when I told her I did all this garbage to her because I found out about everything she did to me, the arrogant confidence on her face and her whole agenda to bully me was wiped off in an instant and she ran away HAHAHAHHAA. Best revenge I've ever had. For context, I had never done anything to this girl. It was clear she was insecure and wanted to ruin my reputation for her own ego because she bonded with other insecure, mean people. I know she's had a hard life, but that doesn't change the fact that her behaviors were reckless and morally irresponsible.

Revenge is good for some people who are so ridiculously evil and believe they can keep going. It was a lesson to her and everyone around her—don't be surprised if someone backlashes after you gossip about them. Every time she thinks about betraying someone, she WILL think of me. I will say, though, I had nothing to lose, so I did it. I wasn't in that environment anymore, but someone was telling me abt what was going on. I'd be careful about revenge because if this person has a ton of social influence and a lot of people like them, you need to take it slow or else it can backfire. You also need to be careful if you're in the same environment.

A good safety net is creating a group of people who you bond with in a group. I didn't have that many times, and that made me a lot more prone to being bullied.

 

[Spectre]

I no longer feel this way. But I know I will again in the future. It's strange that anger is so painful.

 

[Makoto]

Fuck Revenge I want Therapy

 

[Spectre]

Fuck Revenge I want Therapy

You're a better person than me for that. But what if revenge is therapy.

 

[skylight7]

I can in no way relate to people who use adversity to become a better person. I am constantly furious and am only ever able to calm down by using Zopiclone and sleeping medications to induce sleep. I want revenge on those people, their loved ones and everything they ever care about. I don't want to "talk about it" with some funny doctor, I want REVENGE. If I ever get out of this and into recovery I swear to become the most cruel, vindictive, evil hearted, problematic and self-interested person alive. Being a good person has gotten me nowhere and all I want right now is to hurt as many people as possible and cruelly as possible.

Reading that back I recognize it was really edgy and kinda cringe but I still feel exactly that way. This world was not designed for good people and I think I've finally gotten that message.

I could not have said better

 

[Lookingtoflyfree]

I get the need for revenge. The coworkers who bullied me, the men who have physically assaulted me, sexually assaulted me and emotionally abused me won't get a day of jail time. If there was a way I could bring them all down on my last day I absolutely would and hope a few carefully worded letters to people's bosses and families will help.

 

[Makoto]

You're a better person than me for that. But what if revenge is therapy.

you just found a loophole :0

 

[F@#$]

Me too,and do I have some sinister plans.

 

[Plentiful_Despair]

My revenge is death. I can't take revenge on the universe except by deleting myself to escape the clawing grasp of this reality.

 

[Spectre]

My revenge is death. I can't take revenge on the universe except by deleting myself to escape the clawing grasp of this reality.

Tbh this sounds more like they won

 

[Plentiful_Despair]

Tbh this sounds more like they won

I won't be able to care anymore when I'm dead