For those of you who almost succeeded at hanging what was your last thought?

[alreadyfound]

I'm always afraid I'll have regrets at the very last moment and that the final seconds of my life will be pure pain. Do people really feel a sense of relief? Even though I know these are automatic reflexes, seeing hands clenching around the neck and the rope in videos of hangings scares me.

 

[Steph99]

When I almost killed myself practicing full suspension hanging with a harness to take some of the weight off, it was the weirdest thing. Was no pain and very quickly I started lapsing into unconscious without any comprehension this was happening. I somehow got back on the chair probably a second or two before it was too late and for the next 30 seconds I was so disassociated I didn't know who I was or what I'd done.Was quite shaken up afterwards but now I wish I hadn't got back on the chair as it was such a peaceful feeling. The knot was at the centre of the back of my head and with hindsight I must have had the rope positioned in the absolute sweetspot to compress my cartoids. Hard to replicate!

 

[100memoryleaks]

"why is it taking so long?"

i tried three times that night and interestingly enough, only fully lost consciousness on the last two tries, but on the first one I was just barely about to lose consciousness. i wonder what would have happened if I just held my breath instead of eventually standing up on my own accord, would I have just woken up again like the next two times? (to clarify —the next two times, I lost consciousness instantly)

** also there's the possibility that I actually passed out from drinking and having taken sedatives and I may be misremembering now. i obviously wasn't in the clearest state of mind back then.

 

[eclip.wzef]

When I almost killed myself practicing full suspension hanging with a harness to take some of the weight off, it was the weirdest thing. Was no pain and very quickly I started lapsing into unconscious without any comprehension this was happening. I somehow got back on the chair probably a second or two before it was too late and for the next 30 seconds I was so disassociated I didn't know who I was or what I'd done.Was quite shaken up afterwards but now I wish I hadn't got back on the chair as it was such a peaceful feeling. The knot was at the centre of the back of my head and with hindsight I must have had the rope positioned in the absolute sweetspot to compress my cartoids. Hard to replicate!

I almost had the same experience while practicing full suspension.when I step off from the stool I could feel zero pain or discomfort rather it was a smooth and serene I never felt this ease before .I had that excat feeling of not knowing where am I or what I have done. Petty sure the rope hit the right spot and compressed cartoids, although unfortunately I step back on stool somehow, but now I regret it I wish I had kicked that stool far so I coundnt step back

 

[Steph99]

I almost had the same experience while practicing full suspension.when I step off from the stool I could feel zero pain or discomfort rather it was a smooth and serene I never felt this ease before .I had that excat feeling of not knowing where am I or what I have done. Petty sure the rope hit the right spot and compressed cartoids, although unfortunately I step back on stool somehow, but now I regret it I wish I had kicked that stool far so I coundnt step back

Interesting that we had exactly the same experience!

 

[ifihadnever]

Thats interesting, I failed a FSH due to picking a high height and therefore heavy stool and stool was too heavy to kick. I spent months researching height, ropes knots etc and cant believe I stepped back on the stool - but it was not due to trying to stop death tho. I had 'made peace' with that, it was the opposite to the above accounts, I stepped back on the stool due to the pain. I wont go into details as do not wish to scare anyone and my thoughts were to do with the pain. I do believe i got the cartiods which is why I felt the pressure.

It left me quite traumatised if im honest and in great shock and I didn't predict to fail. This was maybe 6 months ago. ive been in a very dissociated state since, unfortunately due to declining health I do need to try and make another attempt but I am no longer 'at peace' with the idea as know what it feels like (for me anyway).

I have a different point with a much lighter stool so can kick. Unfortunately, I dont have the same confidence and mindset but am working on it this month.

 

[lexx]

Three years ago i tried to hang myself, and it was terrifying. Before jumping i was so scared that i wet myself. I thought about my family and the people i loved, i cried for about 30-40 minutes, i'm not exactly sure. It took me a long time to finally jump, but since it wasn't planned and i used a weak rope, it broke, so i was only hanging there for a short time before i fell to the floor. It's very painful.

 

[Steph99]

Three years ago i tried to hang myself, and it was terrifying. Before jumping i was so scared that i wet myself. I thought about my family and the people i loved, i cried for about 30-40 minutes, i'm not exactly sure. It took me a long time to finally jump, but since it wasn't planned and i used a weak rope, it broke, so i was only hanging there for a short time before i fell to the floor. It's very painful.

Sounds super scary and quite different to my experience!

 

[suncide10]

The last time I tried partial I didn't have any thoughts. Just emptiness as always. I didn't realy feel any pain, my legs started going numb and vision slowly going dark.

 

[Forveleth]

For partial, I was reminding myself to keep breathing as the world grew dark. I had a let's play on to distract me so I was mostly focused on that.