Help final preparations

[killing me softly]

i need some help as i'm getting ready with final steps toward ctb-ing. i will definitely be doing this sometime in the next 6 months to 10 years (or so).

first off, i'm looking for a partner. i'm broke, i have no car, and have nothing else valuable to contribute to this "partnership." you: have N for two, will travel to me. i'm male and you must be female, because that's not creepy at all.

i have a few questions that i should probably post in the appropriate megathread but i will instead make a new thread. also, the megathread is 40 pages and i don't feel like being bothered to read it. so can someone else please go through all 40 pages and provide a nice succinct summary of it so i don't have to? that would be swell.

onto my questions:

my method is to use tweezers to pluck myself out of existence cell by cell. yes, i know this may be painful. yes, i know there are very few stories of success using this method. but i read about it over on reddit and it seems like the best way to go to me. also, many of the other methods have a risk of failing. so don't try to talk me out of it. i just want to know:

• how likely is this to work?
  
• how can i make it more likely to work?
  
• should i pluck slow or fast?

actually never mind, i've decided to incite another Chinese revolution and just get run over by a tank. that, or N. i'll be getting some N from my soon to be partner, so i'll use it as my backup plan.

i plan to wear a diaper to reduce the mess. but i don't know which diaper to wear.

• should it be cloth or disposable?
• is there a certain brand that is the best one for ctb?
• if disposable should it be regular or overnight? or maybe a swimmies?
• should i get a pull-up or the one with sticky tabs?
• what about elastic waist? i'm afraid the constriction is going to seriously interfere with the uptake of the N.
• what happens if my bowels release before i'm all the way gone? what should i do?

also, i'm extremely nervous about running into a pro-lifer on my way to ctb. if i do what should i tell them so they will drop any objections to my plans?

i need answers urgently as my end is imminent.

 

[Chinaski]

I failed using the tweezers method but l assure you it's no big deal, sure it's painful but unless you're some kind of pussy it's fine. I was only thwarted because my mother, who is a prow laifer, wanted the tweezers to do her eyebrows. I did give her my thesis to read about prau leafers being scum cunts, which is impossible to argue against, but she typically resorted to the usual ad hominems and straw manning.

I'd recommend the cloth ones btw, yes they're expensive but l bought two, that way l can wear one all the time even when one is in the wash, because if l happen to stumble across N I'm downing the fucker in one, on the spot, l dgaf about survival instinct, I'm not a pussy like most people on here.

 

[Othermind]

It took me two paragraphs to realize this was a pisstake.
What a sad state of affairs.

 

[Angst Filled Fuck Up]

It's actually pretty clever because teh cells in ur body don't have survival instincts lols.

 

[Macc Lad]

i need some help as i'm getting ready with final steps toward ctb-ing. i will definitely be doing this sometime in the next 6 months to 10 years (or so).

first off, i'm looking for a partner. i'm broke, i have no car, and have nothing else valuable to contribute to this "partnership." you: have N for two, will travel to me. i'm male and you must be female, because that's not creepy at all.

i have a few questions that i should probably post in the appropriate megathread but i will instead make a new thread. also, the megathread is 40 pages and i don't feel like being bothered to read it. so can someone else please go through all 40 pages and provide a nice succinct summary of it so i don't have to? that would be swell.

onto my questions:

my method is to use tweezers to pluck myself out of existence cell by cell. yes, i know this may be painful. yes, i know there are very few stories of success using this method. but i read about it over on reddit and it seems like the best way to go to me. also, many of the other methods have a risk of failing. so don't try to talk me out of it. i just want to know:

• how likely is this to work?
  
• how can i make it more likely to work?
  
• should i pluck slow or fast?

actually never mind, i've decided to incite another Chinese revolution and just get run over by a tank. that, or N. i'll be getting some N from my soon to be partner, so i'll use it as my backup plan.

i plan to wear a diaper to reduce the mess. but i don't know which diaper to wear.

• should it be cloth or disposable?
• is there a certain brand that is the best one for ctb?
• if disposable should it be regular or overnight? or maybe a swimmies?
• should i get a pull-up or the one with sticky tabs?
• what about elastic waist? i'm afraid the constriction is going to seriously interfere with the uptake of the N.
• what happens if my bowels release before i'm all the way gone? what should i do?

also, i'm extremely nervous about running into a pro-lifer on my way to ctb. if i do what should i tell them so they will drop any objections to my plans?

i need answers urgently as my end is imminent.

"6 months to 10 years" .........lol

 

[therhydler]

I love you

Can we partner up?

 

[Johnnythefox]

i need some help as i'm getting ready with final steps toward ctb-ing. i will definitely be doing this sometime in the next 6 months to 10 years (or so).

first off, i'm looking for a partner. i'm broke, i have no car, and have nothing else valuable to contribute to this "partnership." you: have N for two, will travel to me. i'm male and you must be female, because that's not creepy at all.

i have a few questions that i should probably post in the appropriate megathread but i will instead make a new thread. also, the megathread is 40 pages and i don't feel like being bothered to read it. so can someone else please go through all 40 pages and provide a nice succinct summary of it so i don't have to? that would be swell.

onto my questions:

my method is to use tweezers to pluck myself out of existence cell by cell. yes, i know this may be painful. yes, i know there are very few stories of success using this method. but i read about it over on reddit and it seems like the best way to go to me. also, many of the other methods have a risk of failing. so don't try to talk me out of it. i just want to know:

• how likely is this to work?
  
• how can i make it more likely to work?
  
• should i pluck slow or fast?

actually never mind, i've decided to incite another Chinese revolution and just get run over by a tank. that, or N. i'll be getting some N from my soon to be partner, so i'll use it as my backup plan.

i plan to wear a diaper to reduce the mess. but i don't know which diaper to wear.

• should it be cloth or disposable?
• is there a certain brand that is the best one for ctb?
• if disposable should it be regular or overnight? or maybe a swimmies?
• should i get a pull-up or the one with sticky tabs?
• what about elastic waist? i'm afraid the constriction is going to seriously interfere with the uptake of the N.
• what happens if my bowels release before i'm all the way gone? what should i do?

also, i'm extremely nervous about running into a pro-lifer on my way to ctb. if i do what should i tell them so they will drop any objections to my plans?

i need answers urgently as my end is imminent.

 

[killing me softly]

I love you

Can we partner up?

as long as you bring N for two

 

[Johnnythefox]

I failed using the tweezers method but l assure you it's no big deal, sure it's painful but unless you're some kind of pussy it's fine. I was only thwarted because my mother, who is a prow laifer, wanted the tweezers to do her eyebrows. I did give her my thesis to read about prau leafers being scum cunts, which is impossible to argue against, but she typically resorted to the usual ad hominems and straw manning.

I'd recommend the cloth ones btw, yes they're expensive but l bought two, that way l can wear one all the time even when one is in the wash, because if l happen to stumble across N I'm downing the fucker in one, on the spot, l dgaf about survival instinct, I'm not a pussy like most people on here.

 

[Chinaski]

It's actually pretty clever because teh cells in ur body don't have survival instincts lols.

Just don't make the error of starting with the brain cells or you'll pass out before you have time to finish, this could mean getting rescued and spending a day or two in a hospital, and these places are worse than death row, I'd rather be in a concentration camp than let these sadistic praugh lyphe medical professionals nurse me back to health like they're the fucking gestapo

 

[Johnnythefox]

Just don't make the error of starting with the brain cells or you'll pass out before you have time to finish, this could mean getting rescued and spending a day or two in a hospital, and these places are worse than death row, I'd rather be in a concentration camp than let these sadistic praugh lyphe medical professionals nurse me back to health like they're the fucking gestapo

Yeah, fucking health professionals saving people! Who do they think they are?

 

[therhydler]

as long as you bring N for two

um no but I have two first class pairs of tweezers. please PM

 

[JustAboutDone]

It took me two paragraphs to realize this was a pisstake.
What a sad state of affairs.

I had to read the whole thread...

 

[JustAboutDone]

I can't breathe

 

[therhydler]

I had to read the whole thread...

♡

 

[Trulysorry]

I had to read the whole thread...

I had to read it twice haha.. I'm a bit slow

 

[989-X]

and here i was legitimately trying to rationalize PLUCKING YOURSELF TO DEATH.

what the fuck is my head even

 

[JustAboutDone]

I had to look some words up!!!

I think this thread should be stickied

Edit: the words I tried to look up were 'praugh' and 'lyphe' then I realised

 

[JustAboutDone]

I failed using the tweezers method but l assure you it's no big deal, sure it's painful but unless you're some kind of pussy it's fine. I was only thwarted because my mother, who is a prow laifer, wanted the tweezers to do her eyebrows. I did give her my thesis to read about prau leafers being scum cunts, which is impossible to argue against, but she typically resorted to the usual ad hominems and straw manning.
.

Just can't stop laughing at this

 

[JustAboutDone]

i need some help as i'm getting ready with final steps toward ctb-ing. i will definitely be doing this sometime in the next 6 months to 10 years (or so).

i need answers urgently as my end is imminent.

@killing me softly you are awesome am in fits of laughter!!!

 

[killing me softly]

Just can't stop laughing at this

i asked some very specific questions. you people are not answering them and instead laughing in here. it's disrespectful to me.

also, these posts are extremely low effort. you will be hearing from me via PM.

 

[JustAboutDone]

i asked some very specific questions. you people are not answering them and instead laughing in here. it's disrespectful to me.

also, these posts are extremely low effort. you will be hearing from me via PM.

Hexcuuuuuuse me, I think you'll find you have already been offered a partner willing to supply the N
AND you've been told exactly how to deal with the Terrible Pro Life Scum who will call the cops on you.

You're just ungrateful you are

 

[NoOneKnows]

Hexcuuuuuuse me, I think you'll find you have already been offered a partner willing to supply the N
AND you've been told exactly how to deal with the Terrible Pro Life Scum who will call the cops on you.

You're just ungrateful you are

Pro Life Scum ,lol

 

[killing me softly]

Hexcuuuuuuse me, I think you'll find you have already been offered a partner willing to supply the N
AND you've been told exactly how to deal with the Terrible Pro Life Scum who will call the cops on you.

You're just ungrateful you are

actually, the partner offer is only marginally helpful. she offered tweezers not N. and she did not provide any details on whether they are medical quality, sterilized, and if they have been approved by Dr. P.

also, Chinaski said:

which is essentially calling me a pussy. what a shitheel.

 

[Chinaski]

also, Chinaski said:

Actually Sir, l think you will find l did not need to resort to using foul language like you did. May l remind you Sir that this is a suicide forum, l am here for compassion/validation/approval/empathy/attention, not to be bullied and harrassed by people like you. l know I'm not the first user to have noticed you resorting to swear words whenever you've Lost The Argument, you did the same thing yesterday in the "has anyone noticed god is dog backwards" thread. I know all your pals will give you likes, because the like button singularly exists to encourage your mean bully posts, but that doesn't bother me at all, paint me as the bad guy as much as you like, at least l haven't stooped to swearing. Good day Sir.

 

[killing me softly]

Actually Sir, l think you will find l did not need to resort to using foul language like you did. May l remind you Sir that this is a suicide forum, l am here for compassion/validation/approval/empathy/attention, not to be bullied and harrassed by people like you. l know I'm not the first user to have noticed you resorting to swear words whenever you've Lost The Argument, you did the same thing yesterday in the "has anyone noticed god is dog backwards" thread. I know all your pals will give you likes, because the like button singularly exists to encourage your mean bully posts, but that doesn't bother me at all, paint me as the bad guy as much as you like, at least l haven't stooped to swearing. Good day Sir.

i'm no Sir, pal.

and you obviously did not read that thread. if you did you would know i only started swearing because i was d-e-f-e-n-d-i-n-g myself, which makes it totally okay.

 

[killing me softly]

i can't believe this was moved to Offtopic. the mods here are clearly biased and taking sides. this is ridiculous. i'll show them. i'm requesting a ban.

 

[Johnnythefox]

*sigh*, how many roads must a man walk down before he realises he's going the wrong way? The answer my friend is blowing in the wind, the night they drove old dixie down, all the people were singing! They went "aga doo doo doo, push pineapple shake the tree. Rubin Carter he fought for fries, but don't think twice ma, it's alright, I'll give you shelter from the storm said the tambourine man, just like a woman on desolation row if you see her say hello. She's wearing boots of Spanish leather, all you have to do is dream.

 

[Chinaski]

That's Gashlightning. Is everyone going to stand for this? Mods? Mods!? Anyone?

Fine i will leave the site enjoy ur groupthink l am now ctb because of you im fading now fading fading fading

 

[JustAboutDone]

"has anyone noticed god is dog backwards" thread.

Sorry for low effort reply but

Lmao!!