Venting Feeling empty (but not?), nostalgic and my perspective on recovery.

[NeoN0va]

It's that one funny feeling that I often feel when nostalgia hits me. For around 20 minutes (or the duration of the feeling of nostalgia), I feel insanely empty, even though I'm not that empty in reality. I start overthinking how good life was for me a few years prior - Ive had a best girl friend who I loved, Ive had tons of friends, I was still being treated so kindly by everyone, everybody liked me, I used to always have a smile on my face and would very rarely think about megative stuff. But once the nostalgia is gone, I realise that it's all just a false memory that I have, as those weren't really good times; I didnt care about my mental health, I was being taken advantage of by that best girl friend, I wasn't really being treated that kindly, it's just that I ignored all the negative comments (kind of ignored, as they still have had impact on my current state of mental health since they've accumulated), I smiled only because I was happy to have such a cool female friend, but I didnt know back then that she was taking advantage of me.

Nowadays I feel kind of the same as back then, but with the exception that I no longer have that many friends, noone is taking advantage of me anymore, my parents now care about me and my mental, I smile because I'm actually enjoying my time and not just because of a single person, but I think way more about negative things too.

Recovery is hard, and probably will always be hard, as it is literally like having to climb back up a really tall mountain after being pushed all the way back to the bottom of it. But with the enough efforts, consistency and dedication, you can make your way back to the summit. And once you arrive there, you have to try your best and not get pushed off again.

To all those that struggle at recovery way more than me, I wish you all the strength to keep going and recover, as life is just worth living, no matter how you look at it. It may be hard at times, but it is definitely worth the efforts and the risks.

Goodnight,
Galacticwarrior777​

 

[timf]

There can be all sorts of reasons for constructing false memories. Some look back at their school days with a fondness greater than what they had when they were in school. Some view previous jobs as much more rewarding than they were. People can even exaggerate difficulties they have faced.

The human power of imagination can be a useful tool. However, it can also cause problems. It can contribute to a dissatisfaction with a person, situation, or even just the present. It sounds like you are coming to terms with the present and that can be a solid foundation on which to build your future.