Help Feel like I'm in a corner.

[ikadasui]

I have to group up with people in 2hrs and it's driving me insane. I can't stomach the anxiety from it at all, and I want to attempt right now. I doubt I can even do a successful attempt right now my family is home and I don't have a strong tool to hang myself with, but I just can't do it. Feels like I'm surrounded by flames and they are inching closer by the second, I'm afraid if I go to this event the one person who I really care for will finally tell me off and then I'll have nothing. It's been bad for so long and tomorrow looks even worse because it will be more of the same as tonight+ work. I can't do it! I've never felt such fucking dread before, but I can't be conscious for this I'm fucked
Tying a make shift noose now, I doubt it will work but I'm out of fucking ideas. Locking my door so at least nobody will get in for a while. Hope this is it

 

[tiredquail]

let them tell you off , see what happens the option is always there

 

[ikadasui]

Didn't work as expected, but I did fucking try multiple times. Now i'm just laughing and crying because I got 30mins till I'm fucked

 

[aludnelac]

Didn't work as expected, but I did fucking try multiple times. Now i'm just laughing and crying because I got 30mins till I'm fucked

fuck.. is there any way that you can just lock yourself away from all of this and avoid it altogether, even by running away if necessary..? i mean, if it's driving you to suicide before you even had the proper means, getting away from it seems like a priority rn..

 

[tiredquail]

My dad hung himself in his closet 5 years ago , He drank wine before hand and I think probably took sleeping pills... the hospital and autopsy didn't check .
Figured I would try that way but its harder then it looks and his was just a sit down hanging ... now I just have a migraine too many people knocking on the door , not enough time.
Just lock yourself in your room til everyone leaves?Or confront them and just be blunt about eveything, I tend to find this makes people leave you alone

 

[FuneralCry]

I'm sorry you are in this situation. I understand it is awful to feel so much anxiety. I wish you the best no matter what happens.