Help Failed attempt.

[Dino_flower]

I don't know what there is in me that fights to live, I wish I was fully convinced that I want to die.

Tried to kill myself again, backed away because my survival instinct kicked in. Something in me still has the will to live and I want to get rid of it so I can leave in peace.

Life is killing me. I lost everything, I have to face abuse everyday, I have no reason to be alive. I tried to strangle myself but the moment the dizziness started kicking in, I un-tied the knot. Now I'm just left with the same headache and ear pain that I had when I tried this before. I've never made it so far to pass out and block blood supply because I have always backed away from it.

Maybe I just want to prove my suffering to people since I look so happy and well. Since I can never be ungrateful and fight back to the things that people throw at me. Since I'm such an attention-seeker, I said why not and tried to end it all for once but still, I turned back because for some wonderful fucking reason, I still want to live even though I have consciously given up. Am I even suicidal?

 

[frommolecules2stars]

Strangling yourself is not a recommended way to ctb. Everyone, and I even mean the most suicidal, has a survival instinct. It's programmed into our genes. Methods such as strangling yourself or trying to cut an artery have a low success rate. It is easy for your brain to stop your body from hurting itself.

A better way would be to poison yourself such as using the SN method. If you cannot access that but have rope, hanging yourself is a better option to just straight strangulation. But you have to be full on hanging straight from your neck.

 

[Dino_flower]

Thank you. What happens if I fail at the SN attempt?

 

[Kyotospade]

Thank you. What happens if I fail at the SN attempt?

You'll most likely wake up in the hospital. The chances that you survive are very very low.