I'm surprised you're in a relationship rn with everything going on, but actually that's probably for the best. Idk I feel like my life is a bit of a mess rn, sorta rock bottom in a lot of ways, mental health isn't the worst & not the best, a relationship isn't really whats on my mind rn but ig it makes sense as a man since its hard to take girls on dates if you're broke and shit lol. The only focus for me rn is getting a job, learning new things, saving money, and getting out of this house. But anyways enough about that, idk I just found it interesting being in a relationship with all this stuff happening, but if you have a supportive partner I think that's actually really the best thing.
I just wanna say I'm sorry for everything you went through. It seems like you've just got so much going on, not only with mental health but also your gut pain and being in and out of hospitals. I'm not an expert on all that, and I don't know exactly how your life is or what you diet looks like. Although I'm extremely into health and I think you should look into the foods that can damage your gut as well as foods that are healthy for your gut, I highly recommend you research those things if you have not already because diet can make a huge difference. It's honestly quite fascinating, the intestines, the gut, the brain, it's all connected and they call the gut the second brain bc it has hundreds of millions of neurons in it. I'm sorry I am a nerd okay I know.
Okay I keep rambling about seemingly small points in your message so I've gotta conclude this all before it gets too long. I wanna say that I'm super glad that you're wanting to recover. You also said, " it just doesn't feel like recovery is possible for someone like me" and I want you to just remove that thought out of your head real quick. Literally yeet that shit outta here. We are well aware of how many bad things happened in your life, but there's no reason things can't get better in different ways eventually. Sure there are some things that have happened that are out of your control. But there are many things that you can do each and every day. Focus on what you can do. If you ever have those wack thoughts of helplessness ever again I want you to grab them and yeet those thoughts into outer space. "tend to the garden in your control" or in other words do what you can to improve each day in regards to the things you can control. If you have a big goal that's great, but don't focus on that, focus on the actions required to get there. And before you know it you'll look back and see how far you've come.
I'm proud of you for wanting to recover despite everything. That's pretty cool.
