Discussion Enjoying your Christmas?

[bigj75]

I'm relaxing in bed. Wishing i was dead.

Hopefully some of y'all are enjoying your Christmas.

 

[Eden2k]

I'm laid across my bed thinking I should be grateful for so much. My life is a joke now due to mental illness that is persistent and doesn't give up tormenting me.

 

[EndofMyRope]

I'm lying in bed hoping I can sleep most of the day away. Still haven't slept from last night.... Quite overtired at this point.

 

[Nanako]

I'm in bed and sad, trying to come to terms with the fact that I'll have to endure life for quite a bit longer than I expected...

 

[Thoughtforms]

The person I still love decided to unfollow me on Christmas Day
Trying hard to repress the want to CTB but it's hard seeing so many happy families and couples.
FML

 

[gingerplum]

Presents opened. Made brioche french toast with a fresh raspberry coulis and a side of candied bacon. Wanted to broil some grapefruit halves with brown sugar and Grand Marnier, but then I remembered life is pointless and we're all going to die.

Spiking my mimosa with vodka.

 

[anelakapu]

Fucking No.

 

[Empty Smile]

I'm enjoying my xmas like I enjoy a toothache.

 

[JustLosingMyself]

I'd rather have a dentist drilling with no anaesthesia

 

[TheFriendlyGh0st]

So far I'm enjoying my Christmas, and it's because it's noon and I haven't seen another person or even gotten out of bed. I'm going to my mother's house shortly and I absolutely dread it. She and my brother are very negative and I don't want to deal with them ganging up on me and shitting on everything I love

 

[gnrluver0105]

I only enjoy it because the food, this year's Xmas has been a lot depressing, first, I have been sick of the throat, in bed the last 5 days, secondly, lots of memories of the past Xmas with my ex, and last, the girl I have been seeing lately, (really just two times) stop answering my messages, this is the first Xmas that I have been thinking in ctb a lot...

 

[MsM3talGamer]

It's one of the most depressing Christmas Days in my life. FML

 

[Lunaemoth]

It's a weird Christmas for me, knowing I have less than two weeks left. Knowing it's my last Christmas, I've been trying to enjoy it (for my family's sake as well as my own). But my heart isn't in it.

 

[Going Home]

Garbage people and bullying. I guess thats what Christmas time is for.

 

[Kingkelly]

Been in bed as usual dragging g myself to my families. Trying not to CBT before. Waiting till Sat is harder than ever. Can't stop crying. Gonna be a rough evening. Can't fake miserable. :/

 

[bigj75]

Garbage people and bullying. I guess thats what Christmas time is for.

what you mean?

 

[Going Home]

A bunch of people decided I don't deserve to live with peace but to be taunted and stressed out. That's how my Christmas time is going. I hope yours is better.

 

[Fucking loving it]

It was nice seeing my son open presents. I have bad bronchitis. It hurts really bad to breath. My moms best friend who was like a second mom to me just died. Merry fucking Christmas

 

[Nerdyartist85]

Spent the last bit of it in bed crying while my husband (frustrated at me again) is playing video games.

Hoping to at least black out sometime tonight so I can forget today happened...merry Christmas indeed...

 

[AveryConure]

I feel like an asshole saying I actually enjoyed my Christmas, but it honestly feels bittersweet cause I obviously didn't want to raise any red flags around this time and I'm planning to try the night night method in February or partial.

Guess I could go out with a few reasonably good days instead of being outright miserable I guess

 

[AveryConure]

Also I tried weed yesterday for the first time and I guess that sort of helped.

 

[Thoughtforms]

I feel like an asshole saying I actually enjoyed my Christmas, but it honestly feels bittersweet cause I obviously didn't want to raise any red flags around this time and I'm planning to try the night night method in February or partial.

Guess I could go out with a few reasonably good days instead of being outright miserable I guess

Don't feel guilty for being positive. It gives me hope that I could feel the same again sometime.

 

[J Tizzle]

I'm sorry for anyone that had a rough holiday.

The first half of my Christmas was very lonely and miserable. Then my family invited me over, which was odd because we haven't spoken in months. And I couldn't believe it - my stepdad got me a ukulele. I love playing the ukulele, and he got me a pretty nice one too. I had actually had a really good time with them. It was surprising.
Then I went to an event I've been going to for 6 years and saw the guy who sexually assaulted me in October. So it ended on a shitty note. But I'm still really enjoying my ukulele.
I feel weird enjoying something, and I felt a bit guilty that my family gave me this thoughtful gift and I've been planning on ctb after my birthday in February. But it started to make me think - if I can still find enjoyment in music, maybe I'm not as far gone as I thought I was.