gnarly
Rest in Peace
- Sep 24, 2024
- 36
She's an amazing girl. Her eyes get me the most. She was my longest relationship as of now. I was so heart broken when she left me but she had every right to. I was an asshole when we first got together. I didn't know what true love was. I only saw lust like most people. But when I realized I was in love with her it ruined me. Oddly enough we both somewhat still like each other and she still texts me "I miss you" sometimes whenever we get into talking about relationships. She's not mine but it still hurts when she's seeing other guys. Then I started overthinking. I think she actually doesn't like me at all. She see's me as pity. I think she's just saying these things cuz she feels bad for me. I think she doesn't miss me at all. I think she doesn't like me at all. I've had many times where I've told her I still liked her. She said she'd knew and that she was okay with it. Maybe she just wants appraisal from a man or maybe she genuinely does miss me. It's hard to say considering this is all in my head. And it's all just me overreacting and being jealous.. and in need of love. I can only think of her now. No other girl. It's broken me. I can't tell if it's still right person wrong time or if it's truly all just a lie. But it makes me a little happy when she says these things to me so idk exactly. My emotions are all haywire on the whole thing. This could all be nonsense to you all. But I hope at least one person understands me. I guess it would be one sided love? Or maybe it's dying love. And I simply only have this so that way I don't blow my brains out. I don't know. Everything is a mess.
