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LoverofDeath

LoverofDeath

Member
Aug 11, 2018
91
I just joined this website. I first found this when I searched online "how to hang yourself" and I came across a thread which was actually very useful. After looking at many threads so far, I'm glad this is the only website where people don't try to go against someone committing suicide. Everywhere I've seen, people always say things like "call suicide hotline", "suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem" or a few lines about how it's so great to live. First of all, I'm not sure why others are affected from my death seeing as though they are complete and total strangers who don't actually care. My family will forget about me as time goes since that's how life is. They will probably cry for a good few minutes or hours and then just go about with their lives. And I'll be at peace finally. But anyway I'm glad to be on this website and thank you for having me!
 
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Brokenanddeadinside

Brokenanddeadinside

Specialist
Aug 8, 2018
395
I know what you mean I just joined this site the other day. I can't stand when people say suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem or oh it will get better. So far for the past ten years things have just gotten worse. Also no matter when I die someone will probably be affected. This community I feel connected with much more than anywhere else because people here actually understand and I am really glad I found this website.
 
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creatureoflight

Mage
Jul 27, 2018
529
I'm not going to tell you all the usual stuff like go call a suicide hotline or something like that. But your family will definitely NOT forget you. Even if they hate you. And they will not get over it in a matter of hours-it is something you never really get over, even if they hate you. I'm not pro suicide or pro life, YOU have to know what you are doing. But they will never forget you and what you do will be with them forever. It's actually the reason I struggle so much with my own suicide because I know I am destroying their lives too in the process. Just be aware that what you are doing is going to impact many lives, not only your own. It does not mean you are selfish or anything like that-you are having an effect on others. What you do with that is up to your own moral judgement. I have lost people to suicide and also close family members have died-it destroyed me and I never got over it.
 
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LoverofDeath

LoverofDeath

Member
Aug 11, 2018
91
I know what you mean I just joined this site the other day. I can't stand when people say suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem or oh it will get better. So far for the past ten years things have just gotten worse. Also no matter when I die someone will probably be affected. This community I feel connected with much more than anywhere else because people here actually understand and I am really glad I found this website.

I know right. They don't know what the person is going through. Plus just because they can deal with their problems, it doesn't mean others can. I hope things get better. The community on this website will definitely care.
 
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Deleted member 847

Guest
Yeah. Fuck pro lifers. Nobody ever asked a dead guy if life is worth living in all cases. Pro lifers are biased. I just read a girl message on google "honestly I don't understand why people want to kill themselves" See they don't know so why should you listen to them.
 
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creatureoflight

Mage
Jul 27, 2018
529
I know what you mean I just joined this site the other day. I can't stand when people say suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem or oh it will get better. So far for the past ten years things have just gotten worse. Also no matter when I die someone will probably be affected. This community I feel connected with much more than anywhere else because people here actually understand and I am really glad I found this website.

We're really happy you're here.
 
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Deleted member 847

Guest
Guys I don't think this forum being indexed on google is a good thing. :notsure:
 
LoverofDeath

LoverofDeath

Member
Aug 11, 2018
91
I'm not going to tell you all the usual stuff like go call a suicide hotline or something like that. But your family will definitely NOT forget you. Even if they hate you. And they will not get over it in a matter of hours-it is something you never really get over, even if they hate you. I'm not pro suicide or pro life, YOU have to know what you are doing. But they will never forget you and what you do will be with them forever. It's actually the reason I struggle so much with my own suicide because I know I am destroying their lives too in the process. Just be aware that what you are doing is going to impact many lives, not only your own. It does not mean you are selfish or anything like that-you are having an effect on others. What you do with that is up to your own moral judgement. I have lost people to suicide and also close family members have died-it destroyed me and I never got over it.

I don't know, I know they will forget me. I've only been to four funerals. I observed my family's faces and most of them look like they don't actually care. Of course, I could be wrong. In April 2010, my uncle died of alcohol addiction. We went to the funeral and I remember right after the funeral, we all went to my cousin's house and they were all acting as if nothing had happened. All of my older cousins all went out to probably drink or whatever and I stayed at the house with the younger cousins. My grandma died last year August. After the funeral, they were serving food and I was looking at everyone's faces and they were all just talking and laughing even though just 10 minutes prior to that, they were looking at a dead body and mourning. I went home afterwards and all of my cousins went to Canary Wharf. It probably doesn't seem like a big deal but I don't know why I find that disrespectful, I guess it's just me. I'm not sure why they would go out right after someone has just died. They won't care if I died anyway, they will just do the same thing they did in the other funerals. The only person I know who will care is my best friend. I'd rather say my sister because that's what she is. Known the girl for over 7 years. I fear that she will commit suicide if I go because she can't live without me. She's the only person I consider my family. I never really like to call my relatives my "family" because it's more than just blood. I'll probably go through with it anyway. I am sorry for your loss.
 
LoverofDeath

LoverofDeath

Member
Aug 11, 2018
91
Yeah. Fuck pro lifers. Nobody ever asked a dead guy if life is worth living in all cases. Pro lifers are biased. I just read a girl message on google "honestly I don't understand why people want to kill themselves" See they don't know so why should you listen to them.

So true. I don't see why she should care. We never asked her to understand anyway. I would've said "honestly I don't understand why people want to live". When someone doesn't understand something, they label it. Btw thank you for the thread about hanging!
 
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creatureoflight

Mage
Jul 27, 2018
529
I don't know, I know they will forget me. I've only been to four funerals. I observed my family's faces and most of them look like they don't actually care. Of course, I could be wrong. In April 2010, my uncle died of alcohol addiction. We went to the funeral and I remember right after the funeral, we all went to my cousin's house and they were all acting as if nothing had happened. All of my older cousins all went out to probably drink or whatever and I stayed at the house with the younger cousins. My grandma died last year August. After the funeral, they were serving food and I was looking at everyone's faces and they were all just talking and laughing even though just 10 minutes prior to that, they were looking at a dead body and mourning. I went home afterwards and all of my cousins went to Canary Wharf. It probably doesn't seem like a big deal but I don't know why I find that disrespectful, I guess it's just me. I'm not sure why they would go out right after someone has just died. They won't care if I died anyway, they will just do the same thing they did in the other funerals. The only person I know who will care is my best friend. I'd rather say my sister because that's what she is. Known the girl for over 7 years. I fear that she will commit suicide if I go because she can't live without me. She's the only person I consider my family. I never really like to call my relatives my "family" because it's more than just blood. I'll probably go through with it anyway. I am sorry for your loss.

I am obviously not you and so I cannot judge, but you don't know what the people feel like on the inside. When my uncle died, who was like a father to me (I have a father but he wasn't much of a great father to me so my uncle replaced him) I also laughed and was happy on the outside but on the inside it really gave me a lot of pain for many years. I just want you to know that you are affecting others by your death too. But this is between you and them, not me. What about your parents? I mean those especially, not your cousins.
Thanks for your condolences-I really appreciate it.
 
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Tiburcio

Guest
I'm not going to tell you all the usual stuff like go call a suicide hotline or something like that. But your family will definitely NOT forget you. Even if they hate you. And they will not get over it in a matter of hours-it is something you never really get over, even if they hate you. I'm not pro suicide or pro life, YOU have to know what you are doing. But they will never forget you and what you do will be with them forever. It's actually the reason I struggle so much with my own suicide because I know I am destroying their lives too in the process. Just be aware that what you are doing is going to impact many lives, not only your own. It does not mean you are selfish or anything like that-you are having an effect on others. What you do with that is up to your own moral judgement. I have lost people to suicide and also close family members have died-it destroyed me and I never got over it.
Stop trying to push back people. I know it's a very complicated situation to be in but people who suffer it feels a lot of guilt and the last thing they need is you remember them how bad is going to feel their family.

That people will decide what to do, but trying to guilt them is not helpful. And probably some of them they will decide to live anyway but you can't save all the persons and nobody can.
 
LoverofDeath

LoverofDeath

Member
Aug 11, 2018
91
I am obviously not you and so I cannot judge, but you don't know what the people feel like on the inside. When my uncle died, who was like a father to me (I have a father but he wasn't much of a great father to me so my uncle replaced him) I also laughed and was happy on the outside but on the inside it really gave me a lot of pain for many years. I just want you to know that you are affecting others by your death too. But this is between you and them, not me. What about your parents? I mean those especially, not your cousins.
Thanks for your condolences-I really appreciate it.

Yeah I understand what you mean. I can't believe you lost your uncle especially since you had a close bond with him. I hope you get better soon. My mum will definitely want me gone since she's always telling me to die. My parents will definitely not care and they're one of the main reasons I even want to go for making my life so miserable. I don't even want to talk about them because I just hate them so much. It's no problem at all.
 
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creatureoflight

Mage
Jul 27, 2018
529
Stop trying to push back people. I know it's a very complicated situation to be in but people who suffer it feels a lot of guilt and the last thing they need is you remember them how bad is going to feel their family.

That people will decide what to do, but trying to guilt them is not helpful. And probably some of them they will decide to live anyway but you can't save all the persons and nobody can.

I'm not on here to save anyone and I'm not pro life and not pro suicide, either.
But people need to know that they are also having an impact on others so that they realize this.
What they decide to do with that is up to them.
 
thetwilightzone

thetwilightzone

Specialist
Jul 14, 2018
307
I'm not on here to save anyone and I'm not pro life and not pro suicide, either.
But people need to know that they are also having an impact on others so that they realize this.
What they decide to do with that is up to them.

If someone will not pay for my clothing, food and shelter then I DON'T give a shit about how much grief they go through. Why should I care?

Will people be devastated over my death? Probably.

Will I care? Absolutely not.

Posts like these are annoying because they assume that I'm responsible for someone elses emotional state when in many cases, these people wouldn't have cared about me to do anything to support me.

Is suicide really that bad that people can't get over it? After all, much of the pain comes from this belief that every death that isn't a natural death in old age is to be prevented.
 
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creatureoflight

Mage
Jul 27, 2018
529
If someone will not pay for my clothing, food and shelter then I DON'T give a shit about how much grief they go through. Why should I care?

Will people be devastated over my death? Probably.

Will I care? Absolutely not.

Posts like these are annoying because they assume that I'm responsible for someone elses emotional state when in many cases, these people wouldn't have cared about me to do anything to support me.

Is suicide really that bad that people can't get over it? After all, much of the pain comes from this belief that every death that isn't a natural death in old age is to be prevented.

That's on you then. It is between you and those people.
I stand by my opinion. Why should someone feel obliged to pay for your shelter and food if you are an adult and not ill? I personally feel that suicide can be a good option to end overwhelming pain in some cases and not every death that is not of old age should be prevented. I am going to kill myself one day and am on this forum, which is saying a lot about me. However, I also give a shit about the people around me because I love them and they love me too and it's really hard for me to just dump them even though I want to die every day. So maybe you are better off than me. It's hard to say.
I personally do not think it is right to just say you don't give a shit about others. I don't really know what exactly happened to you, I am talking form a general point of view. It seems pretty cold to me and that is not a goal that I want to strive for in my life.
I personally found the deaths of friends and family members extremely painful and it was something I never got over. But I really loved them.
 
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Xingster

Student
Aug 9, 2018
105
I'm not going to tell you all the usual stuff like go call a suicide hotline or something like that. But your family will definitely NOT forget you. Even if they hate you. And they will not get over it in a matter of hours-it is something you never really get over, even if they hate you. I'm not pro suicide or pro life, YOU have to know what you are doing. But they will never forget you and what you do will be with them forever. It's actually the reason I struggle so much with my own suicide because I know I am destroying their lives too in the process. Just be aware that what you are doing is going to impact many lives, not only your own. It does not mean you are selfish or anything like that-you are having an effect on others. What you do with that is up to your own moral judgement. I have lost people to suicide and also close family members have died-it destroyed me and I never got over it.

The thought of hurting my family is also the sole reason that's holding me back. Death alone is already horrifying... suicide is simply to another level. That is why I have been plotting a way for it to appear like an accident.... I agree with you, death in general has a huge impact on people. I believe, for people like us who are suicidal, it serves us somehow to convince ourselves that people wouldn't care, or they will forget. So that the weight is off our shoulders. I would like to believe that people would easily forget and get over it...: but I know it is not going to be the case
 
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Tiburcio

Guest
If someone will not pay for my clothing, food and shelter then I DON'T give a shit about how much grief they go through. Why should I care?

Will people be devastated over my death? Probably.

Will I care? Absolutely not.

Posts like these are annoying because they assume that I'm responsible for someone elses emotional state when in many cases, these people wouldn't have cared about me to do anything to support me.

Is suicide really that bad that people can't get over it? After all, much of the pain comes from this belief that every death that isn't a natural death in old age is to be prevented.
I agree. They said others will be devastated... Like if we weren't, we must be living in a cotton candy house or something
 
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Ssname

Experienced
Jun 30, 2018
268
First of all I believe in people's right to end their lives.
I do think though that we tend to at least subconsciously minimise the effect of our death in our minds to try and make it easier. When people say that no one will care I don't believe them. I believe that they believe it and it is real for them but I also believe they are (probably) incorrect
 
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Xingster

Student
Aug 9, 2018
105
That's on you then. It is between you and those people.
I stand by my opinion. Why should someone feel obliged to pay for your shelter and food if you are an adult and not ill? I personally feel that suicide can be a good option to end overwhelming pain in some cases and not every death that is not of old age should be prevented. I am going to kill myself one day and am on this forum, which is saying a lot about me. However, I also give a shit about the people around me because I love them and they love me too and it's really hard for me to just dump them even though I want to die every day. So maybe you are better off than me. It's hard to say.
I personally do not think it is right to just say you don't give a shit about others. I don't really know what exactly happened to you, I am talking form a general point of view. It seems pretty cold to me and that is not a goal that I want to strive for in my life.
I personally found the deaths of friends and family members extremely painful and it was something I never got over. But I really loved them.

I haven't been on this site very long. You might be the only person so far that appear to be concerned with the damage on other people suicide can cast. I wonder if we can chat? Can you PM me? I tried to find the PM button, somehow I can't, It's really weird, cuz I just PMed people few days ago....
 
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Xingster

Student
Aug 9, 2018
105
I haven't been on this site very long. You might be the only person so far that appear to be concerned with the damage on other people suicide can cast. I wonder if we can chat? Can you PM me? I tried to find the PM button, somehow I can't, It's really weird, cuz I just PMed people few days ago....
Just realized the Admins have modified rules on PM. Only users who have posted enough and have been active for a while are allowed to PM... this is very annoying
 
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creatureoflight

Mage
Jul 27, 2018
529
Just realized the Admins have modified rules on PM. Only users who have posted enough and have been active for a while are allowed to PM... this is very annoying

Oops, sorry to hear that!
 
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Xingster

Student
Aug 9, 2018
105
Probably a good thing. Stops bible bashers joining and pm'ing random people trying to save their souls.
If they have to post publically many times first they'll hopefully get spotted and booted quickly.
I can see the point, you are right
 
RealMe

RealMe

Member
Aug 11, 2018
67
I'm not going to tell you all the usual stuff like go call a suicide hotline or something like that. But your family will definitely NOT forget you. Even if they hate you. And they will not get over it in a matter of hours-it is something you never really get over, even if they hate you. I'm not pro suicide or pro life, YOU have to know what you are doing. But they will never forget you and what you do will be with them forever. It's actually the reason I struggle so much with my own suicide because I know I am destroying their lives too in the process. Just be aware that what you are doing is going to impact many lives, not only your own. It does not mean you are selfish or anything like that-you are having an effect on others. What you do with that is up to your own moral judgement. I have lost people to suicide and also close family members have died-it destroyed me and I never got over it.

I agree. This is also one of the reason I have not acted upon my urges. 2 years ago my mom's dad died and she was and still is devastated. This year her best friend underwent assisted suicide. And my dad's friends are dying left and right. I also have an autistic brother I am meant to take care of when my parents die. This is all so much.
 
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unwell

Member
Jul 13, 2018
15
Guys I don't think this forum being indexed on google is a good thing. :notsure:

Personally, I'm with you... I think we should stay small and quiet. This forum does not need a large following or any kind of publicity. That's just asking for trouble.