moonziekk

moonziekk

𝒔𝒑𝒖𝒕𝒏𝒊𝒌 𝒔𝒘𝒆𝒆𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒕 🪐
May 9, 2023
45
I've seen a lot of people advise against CTBing by saying you shouldn't go for it before you exhaust your options for getting better. I think it's reasonable advice.

I'd like to hear about the journey you guys had throughout the methods you've tried for avoiding CTB.

What have you tried? Are you currently trying anything? Why did it not work? Did it somehow help in any way? Do you recommend it?

Anything, besides therapy and medication.
 
TAW122

TAW122

Emissary of the right to die.
Aug 30, 2018
6,098
I've tried to find personal solutions to my problems, but mostly to no avail, and of course, there is always an existential dread that is persistent as long as I live. Life itself is the problem that only death is the solution. I lived long enough to know whether I wish to live through my 40's, 50's and into old age, and my answer is no, I don't wish to.
 
blackmoon

blackmoon

Member
Apr 7, 2023
50
ECT treatments - 20 +/-

Did it work? Well, I’m still here.

Did it help? Temporarily.

Best part is the anesthesia. Worst is the memory loss, though for me, lost memories eventually, unfortunately came back.
They suggested ECT to me and I’m desperate for some mental relief! Does it hurt after? And how many treatments did you have until it became helpful. Hope u don’t mind me asking 🤨
 
CoolGuy122

CoolGuy122

Student
Mar 27, 2023
142
I got a kitten, raised her till she was some weeks old then suddenly everyone in my family got sick except me, apparently the cat made them sick. She actually made me happy for once.

Secondly tried drinking, it made me forget all my problems and pain was non-existent. Problem is my culture is highly against drinking so my mother begged me to never do it again which I promised.
 
SleepyRobloxGrl

SleepyRobloxGrl

always sleeping
Feb 22, 2023
50
I've tried therapy, meds, I've been hospitalized for a month in an intensive program (multiple times at different points in my life) shrooms, LSD, been in a relationship with (now married to) someone that made me a better person and gave me more opportunities, got a new higher paying job working for my husband, moved and most recently I'm thinking about trying ketamine. If it doesn't work, I don't know what to do.
 
S

SoftWorries

Experienced
Feb 22, 2023
283
Besides years of therapy and tons of different medications:

Meditation
Psychedelics/ketamine/MDMA
50+ self help books
BDSM/sexual exploration
Making good money
Changing my style
Being an activist for causes I believe in
Living in a beach retirement chill town
Living in the big bustling city
Cocaine/alcohol
Self hypnosis/doing hypnosis on others
Virtual reality
Following my passions and dreams
Finding true love and connection
Being hospitalized
Working a well respected job
Adopted two beautiful kittens
Going back to school
Listening to a book a day

I've lived my life in a constant attempt to feel alright. Everything on the list feels very similar to one another. The one time something is different for me is on psychedelics.

Otherwise no matter where I go or what I do there I am
 
P

Praestat_Mori

Praestat mori, quam haec pati!
May 21, 2023
315
Unfortunately there is no medication or therapy that could cure any of my problems (existencial crisis, financial, success again), these are the only problems I have since several years now, everything else would be so great. Nobody can prescribe a "successful life" It's either you have it or not. And by just saying try harder that doesn't bring back success when there is always that little bit of luck one needs in life missing.

Regarding medication especially psychic meds, they set your brain into a state like being on drugs. This makes you think "Oh how nice is the world out there, how great is everything ..." but once you stop them you realize that in fact nothing has changed.

Medicines can only help when the source of the illness can be cured, with mental problems it's alsmost impossible in my opinion.

I never tried to get rid of thoughts to CTB because it was always clear that under certain circumstances this would be a realistic option for me.

PS: yes I tried therapy, but it didn't work, besides other circumstances that torpeded a possible success, it only made the doctor richer and me poorer again .........
 
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AresCohere

AresCohere

Professional Insomniac
Apr 10, 2023
86
I’m still on the edge with if I should do it or not, as I do have some options left on the table that others might also have but don’t see.

1: Push away things that hurt, which for me, I’ve tried, and have had some minor success

2: Log the future, just, see if it’s actually going to get worse, get better, or stay the same. Sadly my super paranoid (correct) and negative (also correct) view on things usually just proves it’s downhill.

For me, the last one is really one of the last things keeping me here

3: Just… waiting. Both out of desperation and hope, but also, to be honest, morbid curiosity. How bad can it even get? How much will the world go to shit? Maybe when everything is burning down, I will have already been so used to it that I would come out on top? More likely, however, I’ll go down with the ship.
 
T

TibbleCheker

-
May 26, 2023
2
I've seen a lot of people advise against CTBing by saying you shouldn't go for it before you exhaust your options for getting better. I think it's reasonable advice.

I'd like to hear about the journey you guys had throughout the methods you've tried for avoiding CTB.

What have you tried? Are you currently trying anything? Why did it not work? Did it somehow help in any way? Do you recommend it?

Anything, besides therapy and medication.
Find meaning to life, life has way more value than just a place we exist in like “bacteria” and eat sleep fuck and die.

Looking at your profile I assume you’re a woman, just imagine how you want your dream life to be, wether it was a loving family with an amazing husband or something even much more connected 🌹

Second thing you need to do is believe in God, I wouldn’t like to shame other religions, but go with Islam as it has the same book wherever you and they are much more held to God than the others, basically you don’t want to CTB then be fucked in the afterlife because you were lost, and CTB’ing yourself is something prohibited in every sky religion book.

In short: Find what you want your dream life to be then go after it, and believe in God.

Lastly may God lead you to the right path and give you the joy of life, may you be in heaven. 🤲
 
illmissmydogthatsit

illmissmydogthatsit

Member
May 12, 2023
29
Here is what has worked for me. Do NOT let to do's pile up. Stay on top of all work/tasks. Do your best not to let certain areas of your life get out of control. Sleep, eat, bathe, self-care... make sure you fit all those things into your day. Keep a schedule- it doesn't have to be strict, but make sure you're hitting all those essentials. Again- to the best of your ability, keep things from getting out of control. That sets the grounds for having more stability. Less stress gives you a better chance at recovery. That has been my experience, and I'm trying to get to a point where I can put that system in place for myself again. Trust me, it works. You'll still struggle, but prioritizing work/to do's and self care really helps to keep things from escalating.
Also- make time for social interaction. Always. Try to laugh with people every day. Trust me- it helps.
This is what has worked for me over the course of my struggle with mental health. If you want clarification or more advice on these things, let me know <3

Overview: This advice is what has historically helped me maintain control over my life to keep depression and suicidal thoughts from escalating to a level that is harder to manage.
 
Vizzy

Vizzy

Enlightened
May 6, 2023
1,198
Find meaning to life, life has way more value than just a place we exist in like “bacteria” and eat sleep fuck and die.

Looking at your profile I assume you’re a woman, just imagine how you want your dream life to be, wether it was a loving family with an amazing husband or something even much more connected 🌹

Second thing you need to do is believe in God, I wouldn’t like to shame other religions, but go with Islam as it has the same book wherever you and they are much more held to God than the others, basically you don’t want to CTB then be fucked in the afterlife because you were lost, and CTB’ing yourself is something prohibited in every sky religion book.

In short: Find what you want your dream life to be then go after it, and believe in God.

Lastly may God lead you to the right path and give you the joy of life, may you be in heaven. 🤲
Another prolifer lol
 
moonziekk

moonziekk

𝒔𝒑𝒖𝒕𝒏𝒊𝒌 𝒔𝒘𝒆𝒆𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒕 🪐
May 9, 2023
45
Find meaning to life, life has way more value than just a place we exist in like “bacteria” and eat sleep fuck and die.

Looking at your profile I assume you’re a woman, just imagine how you want your dream life to be, wether it was a loving family with an amazing husband or something even much more connected 🌹

Second thing you need to do is believe in God, I wouldn’t like to shame other religions, but go with Islam as it has the same book wherever you and they are much more held to God than the others, basically you don’t want to CTB then be fucked in the afterlife because you were lost, and CTB’ing yourself is something prohibited in every sky religion book.

In short: Find what you want your dream life to be then go after it, and believe in God.

Lastly may God lead you to the right path and give you the joy of life, may you be in heaven. 🤲
Look, I'm sure you think you're doing the right thing. I'm not going to argue with your morals here because I have no energy for that.

But please, from now on and for the rest of your life, close your mouth and listen to people.

You've assumed so many things about my life and I barely have 50 posts in this website. Are these "advices" of yours really trying to help anyone, or are these just words that stroke your own ego and make you feel like you're a savior of some kind?

You don't know anything about anyone's life. It's a tremendous mistake to be so loud about "what should be done" towards people who 1) you don't know, 2) didn't ask for your words. It's only going to push them away even if you're well meaning.

Please, exercise being a listener. I asked for people to share their stories and if this is somehow your way of sharing yours, take a look at how everyone else did it — saying "personally, this is what worked for me", stuff like that. It's so easy to just share your knowledge of what you might think is helpful in a way that doesn't impose anything on anyone, and there are various examples of this in this thread.

Seriously, re-evaluate.

We don't have to agree on morals but you have no right to act this way.
Here is what has worked for me. Do NOT let to do's pile up. Stay on top of all work/tasks. Do your best not to let certain areas of your life get out of control. Sleep, eat, bathe, self-care... make sure you fit all those things into your day. Keep a schedule- it doesn't have to be strict, but make sure you're hitting all those essentials. Again- to the best of your ability, keep things from getting out of control. That sets the grounds for having more stability. Less stress gives you a better chance at recovery. That has been my experience, and I'm trying to get to a point where I can put that system in place for myself again. Trust me, it works. You'll still struggle, but prioritizing work/to do's and self care really helps to keep things from escalating.
Also- make time for social interaction. Always. Try to laugh with people every day. Trust me- it helps.
This is what has worked for me over the course of my struggle with mental health. If you want clarification or more advice on these things, let me know <3

Overview: This advice is what has historically helped me maintain control over my life to keep depression and suicidal thoughts from escalating to a level that is harder to manage.
screenshotted this - very practical and solid advice. thank you for sharing.
 
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Aisley

Aisley

Experienced
Mar 12, 2023
282
Lol! "Have you tried god?" Friggin tears over here. I give him a day. Mebbe two, we'll see. It's his first comment, after all.

Anyway, I was gonna come in here and say sex and drugs really distracted me through a solid decade, but then I re-read your post and decided against it. I mean, how is that not exactly the same as therapy and medication?
 
F

Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
3,310
Actually- I've only done one round of therapy/ prescribed medication. The meds did nothing. The therapy- I didn't give enough of a chance... Asides from that:

- Tried 'natural' remedies- St John's Wort and 5 HTP.

- Exercised and improved my diet.

- Went back to uni as a mature student.

- Moved three times across the country to 'start again.'

-Tried to settle down and make my living space nice.

- Read lots of self help books and watched lots of YouTube videos on dealing with different things.

- Made a real effort with my appearance- tried to embrace a culturally acceptable form of 'femininity'. Abandoned that to feel comfortable with myself.

- Changed my job frequently from full time permanent to freelance- alternating between the need for stability and freedom but always tried to pursue a creative career. (My dream job.)

- Started Etsy shops.

-Tried to learn to drive.

- Got away from it all on holidays and day trips and walks in nature.

- Tried jobs that give back to the community and help people.

The thing is though- I'm simply not willing to put in the effort to the things that MIGHT actually 'fix' me. My life would be better if I could earn enough money from the job I want to do. That's difficult as it is. My industry is extremely competetive and truthfully- I'm not good enough. It would help though if I could drive and had more confidence in myself- and less social anxiety. I'm not willing to go through the discomfort of facing those fears though. I expect life would also be better if I had more friends/ relationships but experience has taught me not to trust people enough for that.

While the advice to try everything before you quit makes sense- it assumes you still have even a small amount of will to live. I think that's what pro-lifers really don't get. Ok- not everyone but for SOME of us- we're simply tired of life. Tired of fighting- tired of being told we HAVE to fight. Even going on holdiay requires effort- and money. Some people simply don't have any energy left for anything. Plus- you get there and then feel anxiety because- whatever it is- it isn't exactly working- you're still stuck with you and your life ultimately. Just how many band aids are going to save you? I expect REAL recovery takes an ENORMOUS amount of work- and again- who really has the energy for that when they are in a depressed state?
 
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

She dreams of eternal sleep
Sep 24, 2020
23,146
Wanting to die isn’t and could never be an “illness”, in fact wanting suicide is a perfectly logical response to existing in this nightmarish and chaotic world, in fact it’s irrational to want to exist in this world that is filled with endless potential for suffering where all that we are destined for is to be tormented by old age.

Existence is so incredibly futile and meaningless, the reality is that to exist means to be a slave, we are slaves to our suffering, our needs and our decaying flesh prison, to me existence could never be a desirable state and I view it as always being preferable to cease existing as there are no disadvantages to not existing, nobody can be harmed by not being trapped in this world while in comparison in existence there is unlimited potential for harm. To me it would be completely absurd to actually want to delay the inevitable and suffer in the process, I just have awareness that existence is just a tragic consequence of evolution, it’s an unnecessary disturbance in what would otherwise be the perfect state of not-being.

Not everyone sees existence as being worth enduring and labelling suicidal people as being “ill” is just insensitive, when people go on about how suicidal people need help, it’s just ignorance and delusions. The fact is that we are all destined to die and everything will be forgotten about in death anyway so there is no reason for anyone to prolong their suffering if they don’t wish to. In my opinion maybe threads like these are more suited for the “recovery” section, your post assumes that everyone desires existence and wants to stay here, but existence repluses me personally, there is nothing to be gained by enduring this unnecessary process of slowly dying. Simply just being conscious and aware makes the thought of not existing sound so incredibly appealing.
 
pockettan

pockettan

All I can do is dream, for I am so, so tired.
Mar 12, 2023
398
Nothing professional, cuz I don't have the money and the courage for therapy and medications. I've tried talking about it (not much tho cuz I feel shame for speaking out) to my friends, exposing myself to positive medias, think of better purposes for my life and some more. It worked, though not for long. The mental health system in my country is kinda trash so idk if it will help.
 
whatevs

whatevs

Mining for copium in the weirdest places.
Jan 15, 2022
2,885
Things that help or have helped but not consistently or not enough:

- Become enthusiastic about an occupation/activity (programming), prior literature or writing.

- Getting an education and a job and therefore partake in the illusion of having the life of someone with normal energy levels/no nausea or headaches.

- Getting romantically/sexually active again.

- I'm purposefully leaving out the many, many doctors, psychologists or New Age healers of all sorts and the treatments I have tried without success.

Everything failed as they were bandaids for a deeper problem, chronic, apparently untreatable health problems, some of which are doing cumulative mental and physical damage.

The deeper problem is what we need addressed, or what will make us kill ourselves. Simple. Ruthless. Factual. But bandaids are easier and work for a time.

Things that I need to do every day and evaluate the effects:

- Find something that makes you laugh.

- Find something good to read or to play (games).

- Meditate/conscious breathing.
 
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L

LittleJem

Visionary
Jul 3, 2019
2,153
I was in a therapy cult for years. It was a mix between’ritual’, trance, neo-tantra, gestalt. It cost me £1000s. I felt better for the days on their retreats and terrible the rest of the year. From crying all day every day to feeling fine back to crying all day every day. It did give me hope and kept me alive and a community, though now I see it exploited me without referring me to psychiatry. Though I guess psychiatry is also a cult, but cheaper 😉

So I don’t know if any of what it was could be bottled. Maybe the dancing part. If you can go dancing. I’m personally not that into it, but five rhythms dancing helps some people. It can also give you a community without religion or alongside religion depending on whether you like religion or not.

I tried rTMS, cost £7k, helped me for three days. According to their website it helps 70 per cent of people with TRD. I don’t believe that, they just got lucky with the research. Also, what is the maintenance/time to relapse.

I have tried pretty much every drug: ayahuasca, kambo, lsd, shrooms, weed. Whatever the drugs tell you, take it with a pinch of salt. I got some ridiculous ideas on drugs and believed in them for years, but if you keep your rational mind in the picture after the trip this can hopefully be avoided. 5 MEO DMT is nice. I’ve read it helps some people, did nothing for me. I did also try mescaline. Ayahuasca did help me somewhat as did lsd. But handle with care/a therapist/a loved one. Ayahuasca definitely needs an experienced trustworthy guide.

I’m currently maybe day 15 on wellbrutin and it’s helping my energy levels and functioning. Mood not great.

If I could access it, I would try nardil and/or parnate. Effective medications that are now nearly impossible to source while we remain tortured.

I’ve read somd people feel better on tricyclics like amitryptiline.So if you haven’t tried those, that would be part of trying everything.

ECT is much better these days. If I was offered it I would personally be a big yes.
 
soontobec0rpse

soontobec0rpse

soontobecorpse <3
May 27, 2023
8
I've seen a lot of people advise against CTBing by saying you shouldn't go for it before you exhaust your options for getting better. I think it's reasonable advice.

I'd like to hear about the journey you guys had throughout the methods you've tried for avoiding CTB.

What have you tried? Are you currently trying anything? Why did it not work? Did it somehow help in any way? Do you recommend it?

Anything, besides therapy and medication.
i've tried everything available to me. i started with self harm before therapy, which led to medication which didnt do a thing, so this led me to abuse my prescriptions which temporarily worked, i picked up smoking which was aight for a little, went to an expensive Longterm treatment (like a yearlong), various psych ward visits (total hospital visits adding up to 20+) i've tried ignoring my problems, which i've found MINOR success with. i've had alot of sex which is sort of a quick temporary fix. i've tried being sicker, i've tried drugs, i've exhausted all sources for me. i no longer desire to cope. i just want peace. with personality disorders and abusive relationships with everyone, there is no peace in my head. ever. this is what i've waited for.
 
jessicaX

jessicaX

Literally dying to feel normal
Apr 21, 2023
538
I've seen a lot of people advise against CTBing by saying you shouldn't go for it before you exhaust your options for getting better. I think it's reasonable advice.

I'd like to hear about the journey you guys had throughout the methods you've tried for avoiding CTB.

What have you tried? Are you currently trying anything? Why did it not work? Did it somehow help in any way? Do you recommend it?

Anything, besides therapy and medication.

Um. I don't want "recovery" and I am medicated and have had therapy. My outlook has never changed and I have no desire to change either. Perhaps you should post in the recovery section.
Lol! "Have you tried god?" Friggin tears over here. I give him a day. Mebbe two, we'll see. It's his first comment, after all.

Anyway, I was gonna come in here and say sex and drugs really distracted me through a solid decade, but then I re-read your post and decided against it. I mean, how is that not exactly the same as therapy and medication?
Love you for this. Lol. You are spit on xxxx
 
moonziekk

moonziekk

𝒔𝒑𝒖𝒕𝒏𝒊𝒌 𝒔𝒘𝒆𝒆𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒕 🪐
May 9, 2023
45
Um. I don't want "recovery" and I am medicated and have had therapy. My outlook has never changed and I have no desire to change either. Perhaps you should post in the recovery section.

Love you for this. Lol. You are spit on xxxx
um nowhere did I say you do?
 
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jessicaX

jessicaX

Literally dying to feel normal
Apr 21, 2023
538
um nowhere did I say you do?
I didn't say you did. I'm sorry if you took it the wrong way. I was just giving my answer to the question. Therapy and stuff indicates a desire to recover or get better (whatever that means). I have no desire to get better. So again, I'm didn't mean anything by it. Try not to be so touchy xxxxxx
 
Aisley

Aisley

Experienced
Mar 12, 2023
282
Um. I don't want "recovery" and I am medicated and have had therapy. My outlook has never changed and I have no desire to change either. Perhaps you should post in the recovery section.

Love you for this. Lol. You are spit on xxxx
i just checked, and he's gone. He made one other comment, and he's out. Wish I'd put some money down.
 
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L

LittleJem

Visionary
Jul 3, 2019
2,153
oh yes, £180 on hypnotherapy, three sessions
£maybe 600 on ‘Compassion Focussed Therapy’ ( he was a real arsehole. Ironically.)
30x £52 on psychoanalysis. She was terrible.
3 years of psychosynthesis therapy. No idea what that did, she just listened mainly. I don’t remember the hourly rate. Then at the emd of therapy it turned out she was crazy. She offered to hide me in a hidey hole when they come for the Jews in the UK. She believed in some kind of end pf days Christianity….

scalp acupuncture. This actually did work for two days then the depression came back.

They all make so much money from mental illness.
I should have spent all that money on cocaine and shoes.
 
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