Does the language we use when we talk about life affect our mood and well-being?

[noname223]

I have read the language we use can affect our mental health. I am no expert but here is my personal experience with it.

I think one can frame a situation in a positive, closely neutral and in a negative way. I think this can affect how we think about things. Positive framing and positive language can alleviate pain.

However in my experience positive language can also be annoying. When I had severe depression positivity felt toxic for me. I was annoyed by positive framings. Most of these statements felt like platitudes for me. I leaned to nihilism.

Though I think on the longterm usage nihilism is no good concept when you try to heal. For me nihilism had short-term use but longterm it rather made me feel more depressed.

In recovery I try to use more positive connoted vocabulary. Language can be a powerful tool. It affects how we think about our selves and how we treat ourselves.

Personally I try that I don't solely expose myself to negative framings. It can make you more sad. However just changing the framing often does not solve the problem. Sometimes it can have a positive impact. And it can be the beginning for a journey that tries to improve the life quality.

But of course not every problem can be solved simply by changing the perspective. For example poverty is such a topic for me. I really tried to change the perspective on it but I am still convinced this will be hell for me.

I think changing the language can be a start for a more healthy relation to one self. Many people here are very harsh on themselves. There is a lot of self-hatred to read. Trying to change the language and by doing that changing how one thinks about oneself can be a relief. It can be a start to break through the spiral downwards. Sometimes even a small step can start something very positive. Especially when one tries to fix the issues systematically and the positive steps accumulate. It is probably something which won't solve all the problems immediately but it can increase the self-esteem and self-confidence.

This is my stance on it. What do you think about it?

 

[Celerity]

I really haven't had much success with trying to reframe my thoughts to be more positive and have also found the process aggravating like you have. Self-love mantras and seeking motivational quotes were also dead ends. Often times, I would find myself even more upset than I had been in the first place.

Over the years, I have gotten better at preventing rumination, but I don't try to force positivity. Instead, I focus on reliable distractions or try my best to zero in on sense experiences. I will try to observe as much detail as I can see and hear in my surroundings and focus on how it feels to stand on my feet or hold something in my hands. With practice, I have gotten a lot better at stopping a rumination train in its tracks. It was the only form of meditation that I really took to after only a few tries.

 

[makethepainstop]

I am in excruciating pain, unbearable agony, and I want to die! There, the language issue was resolved, with the utmost clarity!

 

[Zegers]

Self-love and positivity must flow naturally but its a dead end if, for example, you don't feel good in your skin or in your family environment.

 

[noname223]

For me the thread "List 3 good things that happened to you today" is a good example how positive framings can help.
One could also make a thread "list 3 bad things that happened to you today". But with focus on the negative one would only feel more miserable.

 

[makethepainstop]

For me the thread "List 3 good things that happened to you today" is a good example how positive framings can help.
One could also make a thread "list 3 bad things that happened to you today". But with focus on the negative one would only feel more miserable.

The second thread would be closer to the damn truth, tho!

 

[Dead Ghost]

It has always been like that in me, the thoughts and the language you use feed back and condition you in your attitude. But not only that, also how you breathe and what is your postural language.

Years ago I tried it when I was walking down the street, you focus mainly on abdominal breathing and looking with your head forward instead of tilted to the ground (if you look to the ground thoughts are of one type and if you look straight ahead are different ... do not ask me why, I do not know).

Nowadays as I don't leave the house much, and when I go out I get vertigo and try to look towards the ground, it's all a mess... and on top of that it generates anxiety.
Have you ever noticed how being connected to the Internet conditions a person's mood so much depending on how you sit and look at the screen?

Sometimes I think that life is absurdly simple because of things like this. There is not as much suffering as we think, just ignorance and selfishness on the part of many people not to share what they know so that we all live better.

//

Sempre ha estat així en mi, els pensaments i el llenguatge que usis es retroalimenten i et condicionen en la teva actitud. Però no només això, també com respires i quin és el teu llenguatge postural.

Fa anys ho probava qua anava pel carrer passejant, et centres sobretot en la respiració abdominal i en mirar amb el cap endavant en comptes d'inclinat cap a terra (si mires cap a terra els pensaments són d'un tipus i si mires endavant són diferents... no em pregunteu perquè, no ho se pas).

Avuí dia, com no surto gaire de casa, i quan surto tinc vertigens i miro de mirar cap a terra, és tot un desastre... i a sobre genera ansietat.
No us heu adonat mai com estar connectat a Internet condiciona tant l'estat d'ànim d'una persona en funció de com seus i mires la pantalla?

De vegades penso que la vida és absurdament simple per coses tan "chorras" com aquestes. No hi ha tant de patiment com ens pensem, només desconeixement i egoïsme per part de molta gent per no compartir el que saben perquè tots visquem millor.

 

[Celerity]

For me the thread "List 3 good things that happened to you today" is a good example how positive framings can help.
One could also make a thread "list 3 bad things that happened to you today". But with focus on the negative one would only feel more miserable.

I responded to that thread too. The only reason I was able to answer it though was because I was not actively upset about my day. I did not have to do anything to shoehorn it in. Forcing positivity when you are severely upset will only make your more so. Having failed cognitive behavioral therapy several times, I just wish there was greater acknowledgement of its limitations. Once you calm down enough to reason without backsliding into negative emotions, then (and only then) can you try reframing the way they teach.