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Y

Yllene13

Drowning in a sea of bitterness
Jun 18, 2023
19
I noticed that being hurt emotionally feels oddly addictive, I'm not sure if I ENJOY it or not, but I crave the feeling a lot…
I think I love the feeling of drowning in self pity, or maybe I just have a victim complex and getting hurt makes me feel like a good person :p
 
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Huntfish34

Huntfish34

Enlightened
Mar 13, 2020
1,623
I can't say I enjoy it.... but kinda like you ; I'm so used to feeling that way I don't really know Anything different. It's so Insanely toxic , I fckn hate it.

Thanks for sharing, you are not alone. Godspeed. -
 
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sensenmann

sensenmann

this will be the end of me
Jun 14, 2023
142
It certainly feels addictive to me too, you somehow find comfort in it.
 
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F

Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
8,224
Yeah- I think there are different levels. I'd say that comfortable feeling is melancholy. I don't know if it's that- presumably- most of us are used to feeling kind of sad- so it feels familiar. Plus- that level I'd say is relaxed. You don't intend to fight it- and try and cheer yourself up with something. You're just content wallowing there for a while.

Further than that and it's not so pleasant- feelings of utter desperation and intense grief aren't enjoyable. You know- when you can barely breathe for crying. Sadness is a weird one because it seems to cover too many levels of emotion. But I agree- that kind of melancholy sadness can feel like home.
 
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SpiderLink

SpiderLink

they/them
Apr 3, 2023
353
I noticed that being hurt emotionally feels oddly addictive, I'm not sure if I ENJOY it or not, but I crave the feeling a lot…
I think I love the feeling of drowning in self pity, or maybe I just have a victim complex and getting hurt makes me feel like a good person :p
I think "HAPPY" by NF will speak to u. When we get used to it, it's almost comfortable in a way.
 
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magician99

magician99

Member
Jun 11, 2023
97
I can't say if I necessarily enjoy it, but it's comfortable because I'm used to it, so I don't mind it anymore like I used to back then.

I dealt with my sadness, emotional stress, depression, etc, for years by self harming. I can't even remember the last time I cried so there's that too.

Maybe my body has gotten used to the way I'm coping, I dunno.
 
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12_Years_Late

12_Years_Late

“May it please you.” — Ben Pollack
Jun 19, 2023
200
I've never felt "happy" in any occasion since I've been born. I feel sad when I see other people "having fun", because I don't want to be like them, I want to feel nothing. I don't feel any emotion whatsoever, and have almost no regular feelings of attraction to anyone. I refuse to go on an inflatable slide for a few minutes of false "joy" for this very reason.
 
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nogoodfatautist

nogoodfatautist

Dreaming of another universe
Oct 31, 2023
9
To me feeling sad means feeling safe. I am already sad so something bad happening wont hurt as much. Feeling happy or content makes me vulnerable to getting hurt if something bad happens. So yeah i enjoy being sad in a sick and twisted way.
 
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Doemu

Doemu

⸸ I am my own end ⸸
Feb 4, 2024
212
I enjoy most of ways of suffering, but I suffer anyway.

I hope you won't end so broken as me.
 
MiMif

MiMif

I do not live for others to understand me...
Sep 13, 2023
588
I think I do in a wierd twisted way.

However this might be because I can't be happy. I haven't experienced real happiness in about a year. When I'm in a high energy moment or with friends their are two sides of me I split up. One part is in the moment but the bigger part is waiting for it to end. I can't be happy...I forgot what happiness feels like.

I do feel small periods of joy however when my favorite show gets announced a new season...not sure if it's considered happiness though. When I have a chance of happiness I feel as though I don't take it...I don't reach out for professional or actually any help for my mental issues...being happy means being ignorant and ignoring everything so I'm glad being me.
 
M

Meteora

Ignorance is bliss
Jun 27, 2023
2,008
No I dont. Think it is bc I never got attention. My crying as a child was simply ignored or forcefully put down until I stopped crying for good. That was very early on, I suppose.
A nurse once said to me, "feelings are in love with themselves", meaning the more you dwell in sadness or anger or fear the stronger it will get.
 
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leavingthesoultrap

leavingthesoultrap

(ᴗ_ ᴗ。)
Nov 25, 2023
1,212
No. I wanted to be happy.
 
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