Venting Does anyone else kinda ‘like’ being in a hole? Idk

[Kore]

When I fall into a hole, I hate talking to people about it. I know there's of course ways to improve your mood or mindset, there's resources online and methods you can try right at home, but… when I'm feeling like this I just have zero motivation to try.

When I try and talk to somebody about it, I get the same old 'you should try this' 'go for a walk' etc. But I'm not interested in their advice, I guess I just want… to be heard? When I just want to vent how I'm feeling without being given 'advice' which is usually cliché or entirely baseless like "try think about something else".

I'm venting right now, I don't really have a point, other than… I don't 'like' being in this mood when I'm feeling low, but I do somewhat wrap myself in that mood and can't summon any motivation to do anything about it. I get urges to talk to someone, to open up to a friend and complain about how shit life is and how meaningless everything is, but I play the conversations in my head and it's always gonna end up with them telling me it's not so bad, that I should try doing some exercise or try online therapy or this and that and… I'm just, I just wanna vent to someone without them offering 'helpful' advice.

Idk if this is even making sense. If any of this resonates with you at all, let me know how you feel about it. Do you ever open up to friends when you're feeling low? If so, are their answers always disappointing? I feel like I'd prefer them to just be silent and let me rant, then give me a hug after without saying a word.

 

[WAITING TO DIE]

Going for a walk, or having someone tell you " it will get better " can't fix a broken mind.
I never tell anyone how I feel irl because it's just not worth the effort.
Telling them how I feel in 99% of cases always ended up making me feel worse, because they are clueless as to how dreadful things like depression makes me feel.
Mental illness has to be experienced to understand it, otherwise the so - called " normal " people wouldn't talk so much shit and invalidate our suffering.

 

[Kore]

I'm glad you understand, it feels great having a place like this to speak my mind and have my thoughts echoed, instead of being dismissed.

Do you also hide how you're feeling then? Or acknowledge it but refuse to talk about it? I've gotten exceptionally good at faking a smile and answering "I'm great thanks :D" to any 'how you doing's

 

[WAITING TO DIE]

I'm glad you understand, it feels great having a place like this to speak my mind and have my thoughts echoed, instead of being dismissed.

Do you also hide how you're feeling then? Or acknowledge it but refuse to talk about it? I've gotten exceptionally good at faking a smile and answering "I'm great thanks :D" to any 'how you doing's

Yes, sometimes I have to wear a happy face even though I'm dying inside.
Wearing that mask is exhausting.

 

[SpencerSees]

I've given up on these methods of improvement tbh. My therapist doesn't take me seriously, neither do my friends. So what would be the point of getting better? Who would I be getting better for? I'm comfortable in my hole and since everyone treats it like i'm not even in there, or makes it about themselves any chance they get, i won't ever get out thank you very much

 

[R_N]

It is comforting for me. Society is too brutal and judgemental. Too competitive. Too stressful. Too demanding.

And if you try you can't go far unless you are chosen. So it is better not to waste the little energy I have.

Leave me in my rabbit hole until I can't stay there.

 

[venting247]

I have a lot to say but I just don't know where to start, so I usually just say I'm fine. I find comfort in my own mental illnesses, I just don't have the motivation to do anything anymore. I've been this way for years, and I've attempted multiple times, too many to count, but it's got to a point where I'm literally too far gone, beyond recovery. I'm so depressed, I want to get better, but at the same time I don't if you know what I mean. I just can't handle listening to the same cheesy sentences like "it gets better", "we care about you" e.g. I don't know how long I'm going to last, there's literally no point in getting better, no one notices how much pain I'm in, and people just brush it under the carpet saying it's nothing and belittling my trauma and everything I'm experiencing. I literally want to dig the ground up and destroy myself and take risks and not care about what happens. Why would I care now? Life is a sad joke.

 

[Mäximum]

I feel the same. Can't even imagine myself truly happy. Can't imagine myself feeling not like I currently do. I don't want to get better anymore. I have no motivation for such thing.

 

[Kore]

It's all just so… pointless. It's so hard to get through a day of work, listening to the 'urgent issues' of the day, trying to complete these critical tasks that need to be done, when it's all just… nothing. Just little ants working mindlessly. All trying to obtain what we call 'achievement', which ultimately, is being superior to others. To have a bigger house, a better car, to post pictures of ourselves on a beach wearing a smile with a caption of 'living my best life', with the ONLY purpose of those posts being to make our friends jealous, to make us feel like we're doing something different, something better. But it's all meaningless. I feel like I've 'woken up' ever since I realised that there's no grand purpose to existence. And now that I feel like I can see when before I was blind, I half wish I could just cover my eyes and go back to the way things were. I wish I could go to work and really focus on the 'urgent issues' again, to pretend like I need to earn lots of money and buy nice things and give myself a bunch of material worth that feels like achievement, but… there's just no going back once you know the truth. And I don't know what to do about it.

Sorry for the vent, may not even be coherent, but fuck.

 

[wait.what]

I don't especially like being in a hole, but you see, I've tried going for a walk AND learning yoga. Medical science is stumped.

I once almost told the president of the American Psychological Society that I'd already tried spending the afternoon thinking about people with REAL problems, and that didn't help either, but then he started sweating profusely and setting out materials for committing seppuku, and I just didn't want to see that. So I told him I always feel much better after contemplating the plight of girls in Afghanistan who'll get shot if they try to go to school, and he seemed to breathe easier. I don't like to think about what might have happened if I hadn't been there to reassure him. There might have been a real tragedy.

 

[Kore]

I don't especially like being in a hole, but you see, I've tried going for a walk AND learning yoga. Medical science is stumped.

I once almost told the president of the American Psychological Society that I'd already tried spending the afternoon thinking about people with REAL problems, and that didn't help either, but then he started sweating profusely and setting out materials for committing seppuku, and I just didn't want to see that. So I told him I always feel much better after contemplating the plight of girls in Afghanistan who'll get shot if they try to go to school, and he seemed to breathe easier. I don't like to think about what might have happened if I hadn't been there to reassure him. There might have been a real tragedy.

Lmaooo that was a joy to read. I'm assuming you're from the UK? It was tinged with a very heavy dose of sarcasm, which is about all we speak over here

 

[Kore]

Lmao so uh, confided in a friend the other day I was feeling kinda low, just said I wasn't really sure why. His response was a new one for me, he said it's not normal for a person to be depressed and it's probably my thyroids acting up - I should go to a doctor to get them checked out as they can cause mood swings.

SaSu becomes more of a haven every day lmao.

New book idea: "How to cure depression? It's all in your head thyroids!"

 

[a_carbon_based_life]

When I fall into a hole, I hate talking to people about it. I know there's of course ways to improve your mood or mindset, there's resources online and methods you can try right at home, but… when I'm feeling like this I just have zero motivation to try.

When I try and talk to somebody about it, I get the same old 'you should try this' 'go for a walk' etc. But I'm not interested in their advice, I guess I just want… to be heard? When I just want to vent how I'm feeling without being given 'advice' which is usually cliché or entirely baseless like "try think about something else".

I'm venting right now, I don't really have a point, other than… I don't 'like' being in this mood when I'm feeling low, but I do somewhat wrap myself in that mood and can't summon any motivation to do anything about it. I get urges to talk to someone, to open up to a friend and complain about how shit life is and how meaningless everything is, but I play the conversations in my head and it's always gonna end up with them telling me it's not so bad, that I should try doing some exercise or try online therapy or this and that and… I'm just, I just wanna vent to someone without them offering 'helpful' advice.

Idk if this is even making sense. If any of this resonates with you at all, let me know how you feel about it. Do you ever open up to friends when you're feeling low? If so, are their answers always disappointing? I feel like I'd prefer them to just be silent and let me rant, then give me a hug after without saying a word.

To me whenever I feel like I prefer my hole, it's less of preferring the hole and more of looking at all the work I have to do, how far I have to climb to get out and feeling like there's nothing I can do. that the pain of trying to continue and grow beats the pain I feel now. As for the people you have tried to talk to about this, I am very sorry they have been so dissmissive and have given you meaningless platitudes instead of actually interacting with the problem at hand. I promise not everyone is like that though it is a but harder to find people who know how to navigate those conversations in a way that doesn't shy away from the more uncomfortable issues and shows genuine care and concern for all parts of you as a human. I'm sure I and many other people here are more than willing to genuinely listen to you

It's all just so… pointless. It's so hard to get through a day of work, listening to the 'urgent issues' of the day, trying to complete these critical tasks that need to be done, when it's all just… nothing. Just little ants working mindlessly. All trying to obtain what we call 'achievement', which ultimately, is being superior to others. To have a bigger house, a better car, to post pictures of ourselves on a beach wearing a smile with a caption of 'living my best life', with the ONLY purpose of those posts being to make our friends jealous, to make us feel like we're doing something different, something better. But it's all meaningless. I feel like I've 'woken up' ever since I realised that there's no grand purpose to existence. And now that I feel like I can see when before I was blind, I half wish I could just cover my eyes and go back to the way things were. I wish I could go to work and really focus on the 'urgent issues' again, to pretend like I need to earn lots of money and buy nice things and give myself a bunch of material worth that feels like achievement, but… there's just no going back once you know the truth. And I don't know what to do about it.

Sorry for the vent, may not even be coherent, but fuck.

Other than the competition and achievements, what brings you joy? Like when no one is looking what do you still do for the sake of doing it?

 

[Kore]

Other than the competition and achievements, what brings you joy? Like when no one is looking what do you still do for the sake of doing it?

I… like taking spontaneous road trips. Sometimes I start to feel really anxious and, stuck (?) and so I grab my camera, fill a couple water bottles/a coffee flask, throw snacks into my bag and in all of 10 minutes I'm on the road. I'll often drive until I get tired, hours away, find some place in the wilderness and get out.

Generally spend the next few hours just sat by my car watching the stars. I got into astrophotography so often set the camera up next to me too. The night sky when you get away from city light pollution is just… incredible Sitting under the stars with nobody else around is one of the only times my head feels clear of all thoughts. I can just, be.

When I get sleepy I just sleep in the car for a while till I wake up, then drive home again. I find the trips so… refreshing

 

[Reimustein]

Kinda yeah. I have been depressed since I was 12, I am 23 now. This is all I have known for 11 years now. I am scared of changing, so scared that I almost don't want to get better.