Venting Does anyone else feel like they have a superiority complex & an inferiority complex simultaneously?

[plast1c_sk1n]

It's an extremely strange feeling.

I think I'm the most attractive person alive. I stare at myself in the mirror and think I'm so hot. I think anybody who looks at me would fall in love with me.
I also think I'm so hideous nobody could ever bare to love me after seeing me when I'm not posing and trying to look good. I think plastic surgery is my only option.
I think I'm skin and bones and disgusting to look at. I also think I'm thin and toned and beautiful and perfect. I also think I'm a hideous disproportionately fat abomination.

I think I'm smarter than everyone around me. I think I'm the best at everything I do. I think I'm perfect and talented at everything I try. I stare and admire my own work for hours and expect everyone to be impressed with everything I produce
I think I'm a failure, I'm useless, I have nothing. I think I've chosen the wrong path and that I should just give up because I'll never be good enough. I see other people who are infinitely better than me and yet chose not to pursue this career and I wonder what I'm even doing here instead of someone like that. I think everyone who sees my work is laughing

I think I'm funny and charismatic and fun to be around. I think everyone wants to be my friend. I think I'm popular and well liked and admired. I think anyone who hates me is only jealous of my perfection.
I think I'm annoying and miserable and a pain to talk to. I think I'm desperate and everybody who hangs with me is only doing so out of pity. I regret every word that I've ever spoken and I hate how I'm so awkward and never know how to act or what to say.

I think I'll be successful in life no matter what I do.
I think I'm destined to be a failure no matter what I do.

Why why why why why?

 

[flightless bird]

those aren't really complexes but natural configurations of the human brain, internally translated into symbolic frameworks. there's nothing wrong with it. it's an evolutionary trait and a built-in inner conflict mechanism that can help you transcend yourself moment by moment. you don't have to see them as pathologies, it's just your mind unconsciously trying to identify its own potentials.

 

[exciccil]

It's an extremely strange feeling.

I think I'm the most attractive person alive. I stare at myself in the mirror and think I'm so hot. I think anybody who looks at me would fall in love with me.
I also think I'm so hideous nobody could ever bare to love me after seeing me when I'm not posing and trying to look good. I think plastic surgery is my only option.
I think I'm skin and bones and disgusting to look at. I also think I'm thin and toned and beautiful and perfect. I also think I'm a hideous disproportionately fat abomination.

I think I'm smarter than everyone around me. I think I'm the best at everything I do. I think I'm perfect and talented at everything I try. I stare and admire my own work for hours and expect everyone to be impressed with everything I produce
I think I'm a failure, I'm useless, I have nothing. I think I've chosen the wrong path and that I should just give up because I'll never be good enough. I see other people who are infinitely better than me and yet chose not to pursue this career and I wonder what I'm even doing here instead of someone like that. I think everyone who sees my work is laughing

I think I'm funny and charismatic and fun to be around. I think everyone wants to be my friend. I think I'm popular and well liked and admired. I think anyone who hates me is only jealous of my perfection.
I think I'm annoying and miserable and a pain to talk to. I think I'm desperate and everybody who hangs with me is only doing so out of pity. I regret every word that I've ever spoken and I hate how I'm so awkward and never know how to act or what to say.

I think I'll be successful in life no matter what I do.
I think I'm destined to be a failure no matter what I do.

Why why why why why?

I get it. Kinda. Like... I feel like I might embody a more mellow version of what you mean, but I see myself in the deprecating way, and if it's not, I tend to just think I look good enough or "put together." I have moments where I genuinely enjoy and love life, and feel like it can't get any better. Those times rarely happen anymore, not like they happened a ton. It feels like only when I was doing things with other people did I feel whole. I still have this issue today, and I have absolutely no external friends so I always feel like shit. I tried to fill that gap with family only to be reminded of why I ran away from home for 2 years to a now ex of mine. Her parents were alcoholics. I think you know where this is going. It was abusive. I'd rather not go into detail right now, but I wish I had never lived through that and I ultimately blame myself. My stupid 15 yr old brain. I have no opportunities to make friends and I don't use much of any social media often at all. I don't push myself to, even if I could because I feel trapped in my situation. Sorry, I'm cutting myself off because this turned into an accidental vent.