BitterlyAlive
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- Apr 8, 2020
- 1,635
It always gets worse when the depression becomes moderate/severe. I don't recognize myself at all, or friends, family, pets...
waterbottleman
Not a person
- Sep 30, 2019
- 721
I don't really know what you mean by "fake" but yes I do feel detached from people. I also don't really feel like I'm a person either, I feel like there's something indescribable about me that makes me awful and alien.
lmroch
Experienced
- Jun 24, 2019
- 234
I do not feel fake.. What I have done is detached/dissociated from much of the past. But it is always there. It is a part of us.
BitterlyAlive
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- Apr 8, 2020
- 1,635
Sorry about that, I edited my title so it makes more sense. I know how you feel and it really sucks. Ugh.
Even if we can't remember the past lol. You're right.
PrettyMoose
Eat my arse, Pain&Sh*tness & Mindf*ckitation Grift
- Mar 1, 2020
- 280
I do feel like an unwilling robot a lot of the time. My programming still has me moving around and doing things, but I feel millions of miles away from everything. I'm like a sentient AI that is looking for the off button.
Yup been going through it for 2 years really want to ctb at this moment. Its from ptsd its called derealization/depersonalization. The amount of money or things I would do to get rid of this shit you have know fucking idea. People who have this deserve to ctb im sorry and should never be denied euthanasia. I dont even know if its due to brain damage, seizures, or fucking what. It feels like fucking dementia but yes im so glad i found someone who has the same thing as me.
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_Minsk
death: the cure for life
- Dec 9, 2019
- 1,109
same here, Depersonalization / Derealisation are horrible, interesting, you say when you are feeling low it gets worse, its the same for me!
its a coping mechanism, designed to help you cope with this horrible reality...^^
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Well it can go fuck itself...
_Minsk
death: the cure for life
- Dec 9, 2019
- 1,109
its supposed to detach you from reality to prevent another traumatic experience, it will go away when you feel save, but for some it seems impossible, i couldnt get fully rid of it too, its like a switch, once its turned on it cant get fully deactivated again. at least its what i believe
lmroch
Experienced
- Jun 24, 2019
- 234
The stats here are very surprising. Only 3 times more likely to have depression, but 15 times more likely to commit suicide.
I don't feel like that right now, and thankfully haven't experienced the sensation you describe in many years.
But I lived with the feeling that "everything was unreal" when I was very ill. I had intense anxiety and suffered from excruciating physical pain which sent my body and mind into some sort of shock. That state of shock lasted for many months.
It's a dreadul and scary feeling - now when I think of it, I would say the scariest in my life.
I remember how weird, how strange and unnatural it felt to be touching things, or look at things, or eat, or listen to people - hard to put into words.
But I lived with the feeling that "everything was unreal" when I was very ill. I had intense anxiety and suffered from excruciating physical pain which sent my body and mind into some sort of shock. That state of shock lasted for many months.
It's a dreadul and scary feeling - now when I think of it, I would say the scariest in my life.
I remember how weird, how strange and unnatural it felt to be touching things, or look at things, or eat, or listen to people - hard to put into words.
Yup thats what I literally have right now to this day. Mine never went away. I've been under extreme stress anxiet and neglect i have cptsd. And someone on here that went to dignitas to have assisted s said therapy cant even fix it...the brain is damaged...and so even they accepted him for that condition cus they know how fucked up it is.
Notwinnernotawin
Specialist
- Apr 4, 2020
- 341
Sometimes I do. It only gets worse at certain times, because some people have the bravery to call me awful things and treat me as if I'm not human.
No, but I was like that when on high levels of Prozac. I had to sit in the car at lunch and try and convince myself that other people were real and it wasn't acceptable to smack them in the face when they annoyed me.
Not taking that drug again!
Not taking that drug again!
Life is so fu**ing cruel. I am sorry you are in hell... because what you are going through can only be described as hell.
High levels of ssri will do that to you. I am currently on Sertraline, trying to come off it. Just waiting for the right moment, because it's a hard battle and I don't want to lose it this time (it's not my first attempt to quit).
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Taki
Specialist
- Jul 30, 2019
- 319
Yes I get this. I look at photos of myself and it seems to be someone else's life. Once I was so depressed and out of it that I saw myself I the bathroom mirror and thought a stranger had broken in to my apartment.
TheSoulless
I'd like to fly but my wings have been so denied
- Jan 7, 2020
- 1,055
I experience this, thought not severely. My past years feel like they were lived by someone else.
Myforevercharlie
Global Mod
- Feb 13, 2020
- 3,021
I feel like something exciting next to myself... Don't know how to describe it...
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