Discussion do you want to say something to someone before you go?

[ctbcat]

... i might, i'll see. mostly because i don't care if it ruins their life following it, because they ruined mine.

it wouldn't be an violent one. it would be romantic. but you know how that is, hearing that from a dead person. i wonder if they'd even care. i never meant anything to them. i was just one rebound after another. but i have so much i want to say.

... is that just letting them win?

ah, also... feel free to vaguepost, if this made you think of someone and you wanna get it out there. i like when it turns into a discussion where everybody can get their stuff out

i love you guys, by the way. cliche, maybe. but i thought i'd say, just in case you haven't heard it in a while. i love you, and i wish i could take care of you - comb your hair, put handcream on your hands, et cetera.

 

[NekiLik]

I already prepared several notes and letters to family, friends, etc. I want to have to last word and tell them things I might not have been able to.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

Part of my CTB plans include detailed notes, letters directed at specific people, and even video recordings to clarify these letters once they are done.

 

[SoulofSteel]

I have a note that I keep updating whenever I think of something I want to say, I will also leave a message directed at one specific person, and while I won't be here to give a damn whether they care or not, at least I will be free from my pain, and if they do end up caring well too late.

 

[hermestrimegistus]

I don't think there's a point. I'll/you'll be dead, and there can't really be a discussion anymore. Unless you're trying to be hurtful and get the last word. I don't see any benefit to saying one last thing to someone before you CTB. Besides. Depending on what you say there's a potential chance of them realizing what you're planning to do through subtextual clues. Especially if you were more reserved or quiet for the majority of your life. I'd rather take it to the grave. If I had anything worth saying to someone worth saying it to, I probably wouldn't want them to hear it right before taking myself out of the game. I'd rather create distance and try not to hurt them. Not drop some truth bombs on them and then die. Feels wrong

 

[hikikomorizombie]

no, i don't have any1 in my life to give a last message to or who i'd wanna talk to 1 last time. i def wanna have 1 final phone call w a person before i die though, but i have no1 to call. so i might just call the suicide hotline to get to have my final convo, or i'll die w/o having actually spoken w a person in months.

 

[thinvy]

I think I want to send one last message to my old highschool love before I go. I don't want to preemptively bother him and stir up trouble for him with his new girl, but I want to let him know how much I appreciated and needed him in my life when we were younger, and my regret over isolating so much that we lost touch time and time again.

 

[barkbark]

i want to talk to my friends and family in my last moments to feel less alone and more comfortable. shame it can't happen though for obvious reasons. it's also definitely selfish since it would traumatize them to watch me die, but i just kind of wish.

also i have a note written out and all that, i'm still not sure if i'm going to post something publicly to let people outside of my personal friend group know or not, but i have stuff in mind i want to say to each individual friend of mine.

 

[heisenberg]

i want to message my current/previous favorite persons i think. there's a lot i want to say to a bunch of people however i'll most likely end up only messaging them.

 

[VoidedExistence]

Nothing. No one feels as if they are in my life, I am all alone.

 

[thegoldengirls]

I think I'll just stick to leaving a letter. My depression has gotten so bad, talking ...even to my loved one has become such a chore. That's why writing my thoughts out will be easier. Plus, making a last phone call will cause alert, which will make the person suspicious and try to save me. I refuse to end up in a vegetative state/in a psych ward.

Leaving a letter after the fact will be best.
Reassuring my loved one that there was nothing she could do to keep me here.
The stinging rejections, being treated like sex bot for men while they treat other women like girlfriend material, failures, losses have become far too much for me to bear. I simply can't take it anymore. That's what I would express in the letter.

 

[Tokugawa_Yoshinobu]

I'll leave a final message to this site and a poem for my loved ones I leave behind.

 

[kotonearisato]

I would want to say goodbye to my husband in person, I think. I have letters for a few specific people, including him of course, but leaving without giving him a chance to say goodbye feels... cruel, I guess. I don't want him to blame himself, it's not his fault. If saying goodbye in person would alleviate that, even just a little, that's worth it.

As silly as it sounds, I think I also want to write a letter for my friends who have already CTB. They don't be able to read it, obviously, but I want to say goodbye to them properly.

 

[Silent Raindrops]

No. My death will be enough of a letter. There is no one in my life that I have anything to say too... Except ...

 

[Slow_Farewell]

Not a fan of good byes and all but:

Dear Cleo,
Thank you for everything. For what it's worth, I don't hate you for choosing someone else. I am only sorry that I couldnt be a better version of me faster. See you in the next life.

Dear Bippa,
Don't be an idiot and cry. I've always had conversations with you about how annoying and irritating it is.
Thank you for taking care of me more than my own family. I don't have to worry about bills or social norms, office politics and being duplicitous. If reincarnation is real, i hope to still come across you. Sorry for being such a pain during the lowpoints.

 

[FuneralCry]

No, I just want to die in peace and be forgotten about like I never existed at all, the thought of this meaningless existence permanently disappearing into nothingness is all that comforts me.

 

[sserafim]

No, I don't care or have anything to say

 

[ijustwishtodie]

I'd probably just write an explanation as to why I killed myself so that whoever see it gets closure but that's about it

 

[VidFlumina]

I want to tell my little sister that I love her (I am sure that it won't be suspicious at all because I tell her that at least once a week). I also plan to leave two letters. First letter would be for my family with general instructions what to do with my body and one of the reasons I ctb, another letter is for the same sister with all of the reasons I ctb because I think she deserves a proper explanation and reassurance that it's not her fault.

 

[FutureHanger]

no, i don't have any1 in my life to give a last message to or who i'd wanna talk to 1 last time. i def wanna have 1 final phone call w a person before i die though, but i have no1 to call. so i might just call the suicide hotline to get to have my final convo, or i'll die w/o having actually spoken w a person in months.

hotline can get your location so if your method can be "rescued" from even hours after it's done or you won't attempt soon after then i wouldn't recommend that maybe ask if someone here would like to call?

 

[Linda]

Yes. There are things I would very much like to say to one person. But he wouldn't want to listen, and probably he wouldn't really even understand what I was saying, so I'm not going to bother. I have got by for 50 years without saying those things, so I guess I can die without saying them. It's a pity, but that's the way it is.

 

[Kasumi]

Not anything I wouldn't say normally as well, no.
I don't want the people that have been good to me to feel like they had anything to do with my death, so I'll make sure to say that in a note, but there isn't something I want to specifically "say to someone" as I leave this place.
I'd like to just disappear quietly, without anyone noticing would be the best.
Some day I'll just, not be there any more.

 

[ReadyOrNot?]

Yes. I will prepare for a long time and write good long letters. I believe this way everyone can process the pain I will inflict the best. At least they have a reason, know that it's not their fault. It's not time yet but when it is I'll prepare.

 

[throneofdispair03]

No. I would like to be forgotten with as little a trace that I was even here.

 

[funeraleveryday]

No

 

[waterbottle3929]

I'll probably start making letters once I get my plan finalized (ie acquire SN or N bc I'm too much of a coward to jump off a bridge or stab myself or hang myself). But I do just want to say sorry to my grandma. My whole family knows I'm suicidal from a previous attempt. I've recently moved to uni as a spring admit freshman and it's been rough. I broke down in tears on wednesday over face time and ended up telling her my biggest regret is that I failed my first suicide attempt. She then told me that if I kill myself I basically kill her and destroy the entire family she and my grandpa worked to build. I don't really know how to respond to that. I feel guilty but truly-- won't their lives be better without me? I know that I'm just a net negative in this world. Maybe I'm selfish, maybe I just don't want to try anymore-- but I'm so tired of being alive. Everyday is a chore and all I think about is killing myself daily.

I would want to say sorry to her and tell her that its not her fault. I'd say sorry for ruining the family. I'd say sorry for being such a burden who's only accomplishment in life is being a fuck-up, basically.

 

[Doemu]

For SaSu members: I love you all.
For Others: F. You all

 

[4g1vvvven]

Assistance would be nice because of my struggles with methods and procurement but it's a crime and makes people uncomfortable, if somebody wanted to die with me, that would be their choice I suppose

 

[Kit1]

I will be leaving a letter for the coroner which I have been writting for a while - basically stating that whilst child abuse had ruined my life and I still managed to build a life and could have survived if the NHS had offered the right kind of support and did not discriminate against people with complex disabilities - and I have continually kept it updated with what has been happening with the NHS, because ultimately they are letting me die when I turned to them for support.

I have also written about my life story (unfinished which I need to finish, but it is hell at times writting this). This is for my children as if they find out that I ended my life, they deserve to know why and how much I tried to live for them and how much I love them.

 

[Shrike]

Isn't anyone to say anything to. The loss of information, that is the consequence of alienation, is itself the message.