Do you want to die now, later, or not?

[Z-A]

Why now?

Why later?

If not, what would you want to change in your life?

 

[Mea Culpa]

Now, I have nothing left to fight for and have been abandoned by those that I cared about.

 

[sserafim]

Now to escape becoming a slave to the system as well as aging and getting old. I'm not living past 25

 

[Bibotik470]

Now. I wish I could've done it when I had the chance all those years ago if I knew how life would pan put up to this point.

 

[trytrytryagain]

I'm planning to die after my parents are gone. So I can't die now, but I do get impulsive ctb, attempts and SH. It makes me feel very selfish and I hate myself even more afterwards.

Somebody like my dad has never done anything to hurt me, he's the person I look up to the most in the world and I can't bare the thought of him holding my cold body again.

I wish things were better now however.

 

[theboy]

now

 

[Sleeper System]

I'm okay with dying later for now.

I'm currently in a state of purgatory.
Nothing is going super bad or super well.
Life is just happening and I'm along for the ride.

When things start to get worse I'll reconsider.
I have nothing to really live for except for little insignificant self interests that evaporate when I'm really in the dark hole of sadness and loneliness. I'm ok. I'm ok. ^_^

 

[BlendedHeart]

Now. I want the torturing feelings to be gone. I don't find pleasure on anything anymore. Everything is meaningless.

 

[bugs_for_brains]

Need to hang on for potentially a long few years yet.

Can't go until my nan does. She's had such a hard life and doesn't deserve that kind of misery. She's been my favourite person my whole life. She's got stage 4 cancer atm and needs as much strength as possible for treatment. It's so unfair how life has done all this to her when she genuinely just wants to live a normal happy life /:

Then I'll have to stick around for a while to help my mum with my little brother and to make sure her and my sister will be ok (my brother will be fine, he doesn't understand death and likely never will). Can't give them 2 family deaths in a row and I need to do everything I can for them first since we have no other family

 

[Unknown21]

Now, I'm tired of waiting and planning, I'll will never Dispense the idea of ctb, ik it will be salvation.

 

[Lobster_Toast1281]

Why later?

Mostly because, at the moment, I lack to courage to do it. Although I don't fear death that much anymore (like, I don't have constant anxiety over it), I still can't bring myself to do it, for some reasons.

 

[jacobryan]

Later, but not too much later. I don't want to age to the point I can't do for myself. But then I don't want to just exist to keep existing either. If I had the courage, I'd do it now and get it over with. But I want to go as peacefully as possible, and I'm scared whatever method I choose will somehow screw up and not be peaceful.

 

[Kurai]

Now. I wish I died from ODing that night.

 

[wanttodie]

Now, I have nothing to live for

 

[DEATH IS FREEDOM]

Now. Benefits of continuing to live: none. Disadvantages of continuing to live: any number of.

 

[iloverachel]

I am pretty much only alive for my parents sake

I want to die when they are gone too

But honestly i want to die now as well. The pain is just too much

 

[Forever Sleep]

I'd like to go now but I don't feel like I can go till my Dad goes first. So, preferably now but practically, later.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

I don't want to die but external circumstances may force me to CTB.

 

[Agon321]

If I could press the self-destruct button in 2/3 months, I would be very happy.

 

[FuneralCry]

Actually in my case I really wish I never existed, only never existing is true perfection to me but apart from that I believe the less time spent trapped in this existence the better, the more time spent delaying the inevitable just means more opportunities to suffer and I don't want to suffer in any way, I see all suffering as meaningless, unnecessary and undesirable.

Just the fact that there is no limit as to how much one can be tormented as long as they exist is enough to make me always see it as better to not exist. I just have no interest in something so hellish and harmful as existence, I'd always prefer to be permanently relieved from the futile and torturous burden of existing as a human, existence itself is such an abomination. In my case only suicide is rational, I see suicide as suffering prevention and all that comforts me is the thought of permanent non-existence, only non-existence is desirable, I don't get why anyone would wish for existence, existence itself is the true problem.

 

[littlebean]

I would die now. I'm currently in a limbo state that gets worse as the days go on. The sooner things end the better.

 

[Morte]

I would accept painless annihilation right now

 

[sserafim]

Actually in my case I really wish I never existed, only never existing is true perfection to me but apart from that I believe the less time spent trapped in this existence the better, the more time spent delaying the inevitable just means more opportunities to suffer and I don't want to suffer in any way, I see all suffering as meaningless, unnecessary and undesirable.

Just the fact that there is no limit as to how much one can be tormented as long as they exist is enough to make me always see it as better to not exist. I just have no interest in something so hellish and harmful as existence, I'd always prefer to be permanently relieved from the futile and torturous burden of existing as a human, existence itself is such an abomination. In my case only suicide is rational, I see suicide as suffering prevention and all that comforts me is the thought of permanent non-existence, only non-existence is desirable, I don't get why anyone would wish for existence, existence itself is the true problem.

Are you British? I'm American so my internal voice is as well but I'm gonna try reading your posts with a British accent now

 

[ctbcat]

later, but a soon later. dying now would be nice, but my preparations aren't here yet + i don't wanna die in my current location

 

[Hotsackage]

My life's over, so technically I'm already gone XD

 

[flowerdecay]

Now, not all problems are temporary

 

[thinvy]

I wanted to die next year, so my family could get a bit more money. but then I wanted to die on my birthday, so I had plenty of time to get my things in order. now I kind of want to die right now because I'm so fucking tired of living. I'm so tired.

 

[JinZhin]

I've been stuck between 'now' and 'later' for a looong time.

I'd,say later only because my death would be quite a pain in the ass for my sibling and one parent, especially in financial sense, so I'd like to not leave them unprepared for that. Also, I kinda bought too many books and would like to read at least a portion of them...

The rest sucks, I hope that that 'later' is soon.