My father tried to end his life in front of me and his parents when I was 9 years old, it was only a few months until he died. He drunk drove and crashed multiple cars too. Then he started hanging around hard-drug addicts, and it was no surprise a few months later that lifestyle lead to one of them going on a binge, killing my father, then running away. It was clearly my father got his wish because he engaged with riskier and riskier behaviours, hoping he would die.