Do you hate life or yourself more?

[disabledandhopeless]

Life

 

[Mr2005]

Myself

 

[braketimez]

I hate life more...by about 2%.

 

[Arvinneedstodie]

I hate my life circumstances. Life can be good or bad, and i can tolerate myself when things are alright. But my circumstances keep dragging me back down to the down to the living hell i am in now, and that's what i hate.

 

[BabyYoda]

Myself. There are people who have gone through "worse" than I did and they're okay. I'm too emotionally weak to deal with life.

 

[Sabriel]

I definitely hate life more than I hate myself.

 

[s1mplem3]

I hate my life more than myself.

 

[kappa]

I would say life.. and other people. I used to have a lot of self hate but with age I guess I just got tired physically/mentally of that. I self isolate, and now it's what I'm used to. Still feel lonely, but whenever the opportunity arose to spend time with others, I hated it. My cats alright though.

 

[Hopeindeath!]

I hate myself more than life.

 

[ohhgeeitsme]

I hate life more. Life can be amazing for some, but awful for others. I actually like me as a person. Even when it comes to my anxiety, depression, and things that most people see as a reflection of themselves, I'm good at separating it. So, I know my anxiety, which ruins my life, is not my fault. It's not something I'm doing to myself, it's something that is being done to me. I try to treat myself as I would a friend, and be compassionate to myself. Even so, I still have felt so bad for so long, that I still want to end it all. Things will get even worse for me. I have other health issues, that by themselves would be tolerable, but with the mental problems, make life unbearable. Antidepressants ruined me even more and I will never touch another one again. I've done the eating right, exercising, everything. I tried. But I am tired now. I know it's possible for things to get better. I know that. Who knows what the future will bring? New medicine and technology will come out, cures. But I am simply too exhausted to wait it out any longer. I've been waiting it out recently, hoping to find a partner, but that proved unfruitful as well. So my first and only attempts were in December and now I'm back to actively trying to succeed on my own.

 

[Yomyom]

I don't have power left in me to hate anymore, just tired

 

[Kumachan]

I hate this fucking pile of shit that is my life, and what i call "myself" is a part of it. Its a package

 

[SugarbushMtn]

Life

 

[NotMeant2B]

Oof. This one is hard, but I do hate life more than I hate myself. Even though I consider myself to be an asshole and could potentially be a better person, whatever that means, I'm pretty much convinced that life is the greatest source of evil.

See, you could be a really nice person, but if you don't behave the way life wants you to, you're up for a pretty bad time. Let me elaborate, there are several levels in which life manifests its awfulness:

• Physical: thermodinamycs tells us that we always end up losing something in every interaction (although I understand that this characteristic provides stability to the universe); entropy tells us that some processes are irreversible, and that fixing is much harder than destroying; the linearity and unidirectionality of time tells us that there's no way back to the mishaps we have been through.
• Biological: randomness takes a big part in a wide range of natural processes, limiting our control and predictability over them; evolution conditions us to be in a constant competition for resources against other species, against our own species and against the environment, and the individuals that don't live up to the level, just straight out die; genetics determines the limitations of every individual, even to the point that it determines their success within their species, take for instance the mental illnesses and physical disabilities which we don't have control over. Nevertheless, I understand that biological proceses are that way in order to guarantee the healthiest individuals and the fittest species.
• Sociological: our brain urges us to look for companionship, even if that hurts us, otherwise life becomes unbearable (some users, including myself, will relate); societal rules will bend the individuals in a way that considers convenient, breaking those who don't follow the norms, even if these are objectively wrong and damaging; humanity is not meant to live in very large communities, individuals become numbers, the search for power gets out of control and every thing lose its virtue one by one. This one is not natural and it lacks of the same kind of stability of the previous levels, it tends to oscillate and operates in cycles.
• Philosophical: Gödel's incompletitude theorem says that any axiomatic system that is complete, cannot be consistent (and vice versa): a philosophical interpretation of this suggests that we cannot arrive to a system of beliefs that is free of contradictions, which is a fancy way of saying that we have to lie to ourselves in order to be pragmatic; after all that has been said, we can't even know for sure that what we live is even real (ultimately it doesn't matter, it would change the connotations of many things we believe in), and neither if we have free will or if it is all predetermined.

And some people might say that I only focus in the bad things, but I can also say that people only focus on the good things. I strongly believe that every topic should be fairly discussed, without the asociation of taboos, without any sort of bias and prejudices, that does nothing in hurting the validity of the argument. Suicide is not only bad and life is not only good.

The way I see it, being brought to life is like being hijacked, being conditioned at gunpoint to behave in a certain way and then saying that, since your captor gives you *occasionally* some treats, he is a good guy, even though the rest of the time he enjoys torturing you and giving you demanding tasks that are ultimately pointless. "You have to see the good little things in life". Fuck off.

TL; DR: I'm bad because I can't adapt, life is worse because it's not flexible.

 

[RottenDeer]

Life. I hate myself because I can't adapt to life but I know I'm trying.

 

[tooStupidForExitBag]

Definitely myself. I'd have to say that my life is very good with all things considered, but my personality is so awful that I just can't take it.

 

[willitpass]

myself, life is shit too but i just cause so much extra pain.

 

[nopoint]

Myself. I hate that I exist.

 

[Aman Sharma]

My life has been good. I've got everything what I want. So I hate myself much more than my life. I've made horrible mistakes in past because of which I've lost trust and love of people in my life. Nothing can make them forgive me and I fear I'm still that same horrible person. I'd love to have a girl to love me and me to love her, but my horrible self will not leave me and I don't want any new people in my life. But I fear of being alone all my life too. So I just want to shorten my life.

 

[whereispeace]

Myself. Everything around me is fine. I'm the problem.

 

[a.n.kirillov]

I don't hate myself. I hate the part of me that makes organic life suck in general, so egoism, violence, failure to comply with basic ethical standards...

Even if I hated myself thoroughly, I would have to blame life for it, because I didn't make myself into who I am. Life made me the way I am and it will continue making losers, day in and day out.

 

[Rockman]

Both.

 

[Oyoy]

It's not life . It's me!

 

[KiraLittleOwl]

I hate my life but I could hate myself as well because I ruined it with my stupidity.

 

[mediocre]

I hate myself, my body, my voice... if I was a different person I think I could've had a successful life.

 

[Una Nancy]

Life

 

[Lunaloveflood]

Me a 100% my life could be good if I was good enough to do something with it. I wish I was able to give it to someone else who wants to live longer.

 

[selfhater]

I hate my body . I want to get rid of it

SAME