Discussion Do you feel there needs to be nothing to love in your life to consider yourself "ready" for suicide?

[FluffyCat]

Essentially do you think that you need to have lost everything? I'm sure there's plenty of people here that don't have anything to like about this life and my heart goes out to you all.
But how about those who even though there's not much left to love for them still have something that they are attached to? Could be anything - your loved ones, passions, ambitions, dreams... An argument can be made that maybe if it helps you stay alive a little longer, maybe you can see a slight glimmer of hope - that there is still a reason for you to be here? But then who's to say how much loss in your life is "enough"?
I believe that is something only you can decide for yourself.

 

[Manfrotto99]

I can only speak for myself as someone who has nothing. Having things and attachments to people are necessary for human survival in my opinion, they gave us a sense of purpose, an identity and sense of belonging and hope. Speaking as someone who has nothing and has lost everything, it is a living hell, it's like having a bottomless pit, a massive void that is always there wherever you go, that everyones sees, but your alive so you still have to function in this world, be part of society and contribute and support others, while infact you are vulnerable, weak and have nothing to give, nothing to draw from, in reality your already dead. If I had money, I could build again because having nothing also means you can start again, but you need the basic human resources and necessities to do that, which i dont.
Loosing my dog has been the last straw for me.

 

[Forever Sleep]

No, I think you can actually leave without hating everything but, the proof is in the pudding I suppose. I haven't left yet. (Obviously .) I intend to hold on to wait for my Dad to go first anyhow but after that, it's difficult to judge how I'll feel.

But yeah- there are certainly things in life I still enjoy. I love nature, I love food, I love films, games and music. There are still places I'd like to visit but, can I feel ok about leaving without seeing them? Maybe. I think it's just the feeling that nothing will make life worth it now (for me anyhow.) Overall, the bad outweighs the good and, in my particular circumstances, that's only going to get worse.

Plus, I don't think I'll have the ability to be able to regret or miss things once I'm dead. (Hoping that I pull it off successfully of course.) So- the way I see it is- it's simply one decision you make in a moment and take the appropriate action, suffer for a bit and then, hopefully it will be over. I have a feeling that that will be more appealing than the daily grind one day.

I think it's perfectly possible to suicide before life gets too bad to basically save yourself from that future. Quit while your ahead to some lower extent. Or rather- quit before things get even worse!

 

[TransientEternal]

No, just because you love something doesn't mean that you can't let go of it. You'll have to let go of everything at some point anyways, right?

 

[The Schizoid]

At the end of the day if you're not 100% sure you want to do it you're not ready.

Simple as that. Once your mind is made up, you're ready. Until that day comes, you're not.

It doesn't matter how you arrive at a made up mind when it comes to CTB. If you're sure it's right for you then you're sure.

 

[ringo99]

Not really. I'm just waiting to be fired from my job. Will most likely happen this year considering the state of the global economy. Won't be ctbing while I'm still employed since I don't want my company making a big fake deal about "losing a valuable employee" or some such bullshit. Just staying at my job as long as possible to chip away at a loan before I go

 

[FutureHanger]

no people CTB for all sorts of reasons. One user started desiring CTB simply because they didn't wanna grow old.

 

[xmissellax]

It depends on the person. Everyone is different. I for instance have a really loving small support network, it hasn't always been that way with them, and they do go towards problem solving when I talk to them about how I feel. They know how I feel. I feel so guilty that despite their efforts to help I am still in the brutal grasp of trauma, depression, despair and suicidal ideation. I've battled to stay with them many times but the pain of living keeps overbearing any urge to stay for others. I guess I haven't CTB yet, but I fear it's mainly due to inaccessibility to a decent method. It really sucks.

 

[Return2themoonlight]

As someone who made up lies just to be the bad guy and not try and be saved when I ctb, I can agree that I needed to lose everything that loved me before I could finally ctb. Now within the next 2 weeks, I'll be gone and nobody is going to stop me.

 

[UnrepentantSunrise]

yeah

 

[sserafim]

I'm not sure, I think that you just need to be disillusioned and completely done with life. And feel like it's your time to go and that the time is right. Personally, I feel like I was meant to die young and by eventual ctb. Honestly, I don't think that I have any attachments. Yeah, there are some places that I want to travel to, but I would be okay with not seeing them. I've never really had attachments to people in my life…

 

[heisenberg]

personally, i don't think so. there are many things i love in my life like my boyfriends and coffee and dogs. but at the end of the day i feel miserable inside. i really don't think i was ever meant to live for a long time, i simply don't see a future for myself. i don't want kids and i never went to college. i have nothing ahead of me.

 

[tbroken]

I received a lot of hate i did not deserve in my life and I was never happy, even when I thought i was. Plus, to get semi-decent jobs i had to make the impossible and I hated it.

 

[FluffyCat]

I can only speak for myself as someone who has nothing. Having things and attachments to people are necessary for human survival in my opinion, they gave us a sense of purpose, an identity and sense of belonging and hope. Speaking as someone who has nothing and has lost everything, it is a living hell, it's like having a bottomless pit, a massive void that is always there wherever you go, that everyones sees, but your alive so you still have to function in this world, be part of society and contribute and support others, while infact you are vulnerable, weak and have nothing to give, nothing to draw from, in reality your already dead. If I had money, I could build again because having nothing also means you can start again, but you need the basic human resources and necessities to do that, which i dont.
Loosing my dog has been the last straw for me.

Really appreciate the point of view of someone that has lost everything, struggling with depression and suicidal thoughts can definitely feel like a neverending downward spiral. I kinda like the idea of building up from absolute nothing but it must be impossibly difficult to take the first step, since there's nothing for you to stand on in the first place.

I think it's perfectly possible to suicide before life gets too bad to basically save yourself from that future. Quit while your ahead to some lower extent. Or rather- quit before things get even worse!

I can definitely see that as an option, maybe a good example could be becoming homeless? Some could see it as a fate much worse than death, especially in the us, with some cities even having hostile architecture

No, just because you love something doesn't mean that you can't let go of it. You'll have to let go of everything at some point anyways, right?

Good point, there will be a point in life where you need to let go. And having to do so when dying of old age terrifies me more than suicide (not that suicide has to be necessarily terrifying) because at that point you might have found something that really made it worth living until such age

no people CTB for all sorts of reasons. One user started desiring CTB simply because they didn't wanna grow old.

Personally growing old scares me to no end, so I can definitely relate. I didn't want to become an adult, I feel like I don't even have what it takes to be one

At the end of the day if you're not 100% sure you want to do it you're not ready.

Simple as that. Once your mind is made up, you're ready. Until that day comes, you're not.

It doesn't matter how you arrive at a made up mind when it comes to CTB. If you're sure it's right for you then you're sure.

Definitely agree, I think it can be a quite lengthy process. After all it is a big decision you make when choosing suicide and you literally have all of your life to make the choice - so you better give it some thought.

Lastly I want to thank everyone for their input, seeing so many differing perspectives is definitely eye opening even if some are overwhelmingly sad.

 

[sserafim]

personally, i don't think so. there are many things i love in my life like coffee and dogs. but at the end of the day i feel miserable inside. i really don't think i was ever meant to live for a long time, i simply don't see a future for myself. i don't want kids. i have nothing ahead of me.

Same, I don't see a future for myself either. I don't want a future though. I think that I'm meant to die young. I know this sounds weird, but I can't envision myself becoming a real adult, like I can't imagine myself becoming one or going to a job everyday for the rest of my life. I don't think that I was even meant to live this long, I feel like I should've died before 18. Regardless, I'm going to die before 25 though. I don't want kids either and I don't want to have to become a real adult or just another slave to capitalism and society.

 

[DarkThoughts]

I have the opportunity and resources to enjoy life, but my mind is too far gone. Running away from myself is all I can think about. Honestly, I don't even know how I got to this point... I have some issues, but nothing that even remotely explains what goes on in my head. That fact haunts my every waking moment. Am I really the most sensitive person in the world? Is that just how I am? Is it selfish to want to leave despite having the chance to be someone?

 

[Pyxel]

The only attachment I have would be my parents who'd feel awful after I ctb. No plans to start a family or any large ambitions. Truthfully speaking I don't think my absence would make any large difference to those around me besides my parents.

 

[sanction]

It definitely helps with motivation to CTB. I'm kind of at that stage now, where theres nothing left to really love or truly care about. However, due to CTB being a difficult step to take, is the main reason why I'm still alive

 

[SoulCage]

This got me thinking so here is my take on this (it applies to me, I do not say that it applies to every human).
Like op and others said, I also believe that it is harder to say goodbye if you have a deep connection with someone. And even more harder if you know that this someone needs you too. A parent, a spouse, a child, a pet... I am talking about cases in which your passing will have a big impact, because your and their lives are intertwined.

In my case, this is definitely the last reason why I can't go ahead. I met my boyfriend 14 years ago when I first thought of existence being just pain and suffering. Together we made life somewhat enjoyable, I was able to appreciate little things. But as time moved on, adulthood became more overwhelming and just a constant battle to survive. If you read this far and think "are you actually depressed/suicidal when you have a loving partner? You are lucky to have someone, at least you are not alone". Yes I am. But it's also a lot of pressure to make sure he doesn't just leave me, he actually told me a multiple times that he was thinking about it and will only stay if I put effort in improving. It's putting even more pressure on me, meaning he is both my anchor and a rogue wave in this life. And to be clear, he is not the biggest wave that is hitting me. There are other reasons why I am in pain. But still... I can't just leave him, not like this.
I am here, reading through methods and planning my exit in case he gives up, because then I have nothing left to stay alive. Only pain.

 

[dragonofenvy]

I've never had connections to others. I've been alone for most of my life. No friends, a family that didn't care about me, no relationships.

I have nothing that I enjoy doing. I don't have a satisfying career (in fact I don't have one anymore!) I'm a black sheep and an afterthought to my family. Nobody would show up to my funeral other than distant family members I've never met. I don't have prospects for my future, and I'm sick of dealing with my old traumas to this day.

Yet, I don't ctb, at least not yet. I don't know why I don't think I'm ready. I tell myself that tomorrow I am going to start taking the steps. I don't know if I actually will, because I've always told myself that. I always told myself that tonight will be the night, but never follow through. Do I need to be homeless to finally be ready? I don't know. I hope not. I hope I can do something to find that motivation.

 

[passivethought121]

No. I still have friends, hobbies, a job I don't hate. But if I woke up tomorrow with my method right next to me, tomorrow would be the day I go. It's not that I'm severely detached to life, I'm extremely attracted to death.

I will admit that they keep me from many impulsive attempts, but the main reason I live is a fear of failure.