Discussion Do you feel like you wasted your “prime” years?

[Rocinante]

I wasn't very ambitious and lacked any long term goals to work toward, all of this amplified by my depression. Don't even remember much of what I did from the ages of 18-22. Mostly played video games, worked, play guitar, head to sleep. Also had a terrible eating disorder that I fixed.
Nothing was happening in my life up till now and now it feels like I've missed out on every life milestone.
If my life were to hypothetically become ideal I will still always feel guilt over not having lived the way i wanted when I was younger.

 

[lessthanzero]

you still have all the time left

 

[tryagain]

I wasn't very ambitious and lacked any long term goals to work toward, all of this amplified by my depression. Don't even remember much of what I did from the ages of 18-22. Mostly played video games, worked, play guitar, head to sleep. Also had a terrible eating disorder that I fixed.
Nothing was happening in my life up till now and now it feels like I've missed out on every life milestone.
If my life were to hypothetically become ideal I will still always feel guilt over not having lived the way i wanted when I was younger.

I struggle to forgive myself for wasting my "prime" years. Unfortunately this keeps me stuck.

 

[Rocinante]

you still have all the time left

That much is known, my life would still be immeasurably better if I didn't waste the last 7 years

 

[lessthanzero]

That much is known, my life would still be immeasurably better if I didn't waste the last 7 years

true but you can't change the past, maybe you had to go through that time to now know that you don't want to waste any time further
People who work in psych wards always say that someone goes through a rough time once in their life at least. so maybe you had yours

 

[drainurlife.]

i spent last 4 years of my life solely on video games, no irl friends/activity. Just seeing my family sometimes every few weeks. Definitely feel like i wasted so much time after high school but never really craved for anything else in life either. Trying to fix myself now and start something new in life is the hardest part for me

 

[whywere]

WELL, at the age of 67, my prime years are way behind me. In retrospect I feel that it is human to always post judge oneself on everything. Would have, should have, could have situation.

BUT that is one of the wonders of life as humans know and understand it. in so far as we would probably do the same or almost the same again. For me looking back, would I want to be 18 again and do it over, HELL NO! Once around the block is enough for me.

Have I made learning experiences (mistakes) along the way? Plenty of them and that is one reason why older folks sometimes use the phrase: life experience, when talking or answering something.

We ALL have good, bad and everything in-between experiences through life from the get-go and wasted prime years? That is in the eye of the beholder, but for me, nope, never.

I do not have a lot of money and/or possessions, but I have a roof over my head, food, clothes and some money put aways, enough for me. I have seen through the decades where folks are always bitching about the fact that someone else has this or that and are never happy, no matter how much they have accumulated.

Money and/or power is NOT everything ever.

Walter

 

[Forever Sleep]

I think I chose the wrong degree to study when I was 18. I rectified it by doing a second degree in my late 20's but I wonder how things would have turned out if I'd got it right first time round. Really- I probably should have learned a trade though. Done an appretenticeship. As it is, I'm middle aged and in a VERY unstable job. All the time, I feel like I'm just going to have to find some wage slave job. It's not so much that I didn't try hard and wasted time when I was young. Quite the opposite- I worked really hard. I just chose a really unwise path.

 

[Gaga786]

Absolutely. I ended up isolating myself and playing video games all day ever since I was a young child. I was a way to escape with my trauma, hence I neglected my academics, socialisation and other things. My parents neglected me and didn't care at all what I was doing with my life at that time. Now I feel it's too late and I don't know how to function in society. Im 20 now and feel like I've wasted my entire childhood.

 

[sammiechzxv]

No because there's no such thing as "prime years". Life is only what you make of it. Any point in your life can be your "prime years" if you make them your best years.

 

[Relic]

I wasn't very ambitious and lacked any long term goals to work toward, all of this amplified by my depression.

I have seen "ambition" as something societies seek to suppress. Wars have been fought and civilizations have fallen because "wrong" people have made progress. You will be tested at every step towards the success. So just take and use what others have built, without conscience. This is the universal formula.

Don't even remember much of what I did from the ages of 18-22. Mostly played video games, worked, play guitar, head to sleep.

This is how you develop your personality, mentality, and become you. You will gain abilities as you age, and will lose some others. I used to write, I still do, but when I read my earlier stuff even from 15 years ago, there is often that "what an idiot" moment. Going back in time will always be a strange experience.

Nothing was happening in my life up till now and now it feels like I've missed out on every life milestone.

There is a time for everything. Not much can happen while you observe and make up your mind about what is what, and why.

If my life were to hypothetically become ideal I will still always feel guilt over not having lived the way i wanted when I was younger.

Had it been any different, there would be a mountain of different things to regret. There always is.
Your vision could be unique, but often people want to be like someone's public image, which is almost always just another lie.
If anyone truly will get to know someone they envy, the life of the subject and what it has been, all envy will die.
If you have your own vision, the realization of it can not be in the past, you will always need time, and the guilt would only slow you down.
The only way to suppress the thoughts is to replace them, so when you get what you want from life, you can make peace with the past.

 

[Final_Choice]

No, but I know I will. I wasted my childhood focusing on academics and living a miserable life thinking it'll get better when I have freedom and independence. I'm only 20 right now but I have to live the rest of my life paying for my abusive father's debt so I can't focus on anything else besides paying off the debt, unless I CTB of course.

 

[theslasher]

I wasn't very ambitious and lacked any long term goals to work toward, all of this amplified by my depression. Don't even remember much of what I did from the ages of 18-22. Mostly played video games, worked, play guitar, head to sleep. Also had a terrible eating disorder that I fixed.
Nothing was happening in my life up till now and now it feels like I've missed out on every life milestone.
If my life were to hypothetically become ideal I will still always feel guilt over not having lived the way i wanted when I was younger.

As a kid I was kind of the opposite in some ways. I was always so ambitious, always thinking about my future, putting all of my focus into sports. In some ways that was great for my mind, but in many more ways I also feel like I wasted a lot of time. I said "no" when asked to hang out with others on my team, girls, other friends, just because I took my sport so seriously. I feel like I missed out on a lot of experiences and I should've just made the most out of high school experiences rather than just focus on a sport that I was very good at but didn't necessarily love. Anyways, lots of life goes on after school and I've made a few good memories since then. The key now is to make the most of what we've got in the present moment instead of always looking ahead or looking in our past for what could've been.

 

[soonatpeace777888]

Yes. I spent my best years in pain and it's one of my main reasons for CTB.

 

[sp4rk]

Honestly, yes. I barely went to school in primary because my parent never took me and the use of transport was not allowed. I also never went and played games during highschool. I wish I could go back and focused on my studies or on something that could have helped me in the future. Can't do much of it now though

 

[whywere]

No because there's no such thing as "prime years". Life is only what you make of it. Any point in your life can be your "prime years" if you make them your best years.

I love your train of thought. At the age of 67, some folks wonder why I still work, why am I not in a rocking chair etc. Age is a number,

Walter

 

[StolenLife]

Yes, but given my shitty environment I realize that I had no choice. It was either self imposed isolation with non-social hobbies or the risk of being abused and bullied. I used to have regrets due to choosing the first option, but I have learned to forgive myself.

 

[outatime_85]

Any good years are gone.

Not only did I waste my youth with too many bad choices, but those bad choices came with consequences that further ruined my years going forward.

I have basically wasted the entirety of my life, and whatever life I have, there is no way to change or fix how broken it is.

 

[SnowWhite]

Gonna preface this by saying I'm only 22 so still have a year of two of my "prime"

Honestly a mixed bag from me. I definitely used my prime years as a source of fun, I'd say my prime years were 17-20. Had a decent social circle, enjoyed parties and a couple men and women. But at the same time I picked up a few vices such as coke, MD, and booze. I still struggle keeping my drinking somewhat under control even now (though it is far less), and haven't used hard drugs for a while. I never really picked up any useful qualifications, and my epilepsy worsened, both of which still have an impact on me today.

I'd say I enjoyed them at the time, but looking back I didn't spend them securing a future, though considering how much my life today is controlled by epilepsy I'm glad I spent them having fun rather than looking to secure a future that my epilepsy would have ruined.

 

[Butterflycharm3636]

I honestly think about this so much, I spent majority of my teenage years, wasting all my self away doing drugs, self harming, trying to kill myself. I just wish I would've done it sooner or made sure that my method worked. I feel like a failure. and i ruined my childhood years because of my coward mess and fucked up self.

 

[Spiritual survivor]

Yes, I was a attractive girl but I decided to start dancing in strip clubs at age 19. That was the beginning of the end. I would end up in that lifestyle till age 34. I ended up terminating pregnancies since I was a stripper and just not secure with myself and I didn't have stable relationships. So basically I wasted my youth screwing around not really knowing what to do. Iam a survivor of child abuse so this isn't exactly suprising of an outcome wen u grow up with virtually no parents. I had my mother but she was a narcissist so she was not much of a parent.

 

[aGoodDayToDie]

Absolutely. 20s, 30s and now 40s disappearing due to depression, anxiety, adhd and autism. Old age here we fucking come. Such a fucking disappointment. Fuck life. Only got shit to look forward to

 

[sick.faery]

yea i'm at the end of my youth now pretty much x( and yea wasted most of it

 

[bubo]

I feel this way as well. I did nothing as a child. They say your younger years are the best years of your life, but really I completed wasted them. It's hard to even be sad about it now though, since i'm still wasting my life away doing nothing even today.

 

[whywere]

I feel this way as well. I did nothing as a child. They say your younger years are the best years of your life, but really I completed wasted them. It's hard to even be sad about it now though, since i'm still wasting my life away doing nothing even today.

I fully understand where you are coming from as way back, yes, I wasted time/energy and the like. BUT I truly feel that you are a vibrant, loving AND intelligent soul and that every day is a clean slate with each new sunrise.

I am NOT trying to be a cheerleader ever; I firmly believe in tomorrow AND YOU!

I want only the best for you, my good friend as I send you lots of huge hugs, kindness, love and brilliant blue skies.

Walter

 

[byebyemadworld]

Yes. Chose the wrong subject to study at university and didn't finish. Then procrastinated, didn't get a job and lived with my parents. At least I helped my grandparents and then my sick mom. My mom died and now I still live with my dad. I should get a job but I can't because my health is failing. Now my dad has to take care of me and I'm worried because he's old. I don't know what to do. I wish I had everything ready to CTB tomorrow.