Do you feel like a bad person?

[FindingHome]

I keep having these thoughts that I am a bad person. These thoughts make me want to CTB whenever they come up and lately they have been really bad.

 

[sammiechzxv]

I don't think I'm a bad person but I don't think I'm as good as people tell me I am either

 

[jemetire]

Yes I feel like a very bad person and I don't know whyy

 

[Lamebrain]

I try not to be, though I am useless.

Depression will absolutely make you feel this way though... don't let it fool you! (easier said than done, I know.)

 

[アホペンギン]

I am in the same situation, people have been terrible to me, and because of this i am now convinced that i did something wrong to be treated like this. Whenever I think about this, I get a strong urge to ctb.

 

[.seethroughme.]

Yes.

Bad/worthless/imposter syndrome all at once.

 

[ANONYMOUSM]

yeah i am definitely a bad person

 

[.seethroughme.]

I am in the same situation, people have been terrible to me, and because of this i am now convinced that i did something wrong to be treated like this. Whenever I think about this, I get a strong urge to ctb.

My Mum emotionally and mentally abused me for years and I still think it was my responsibility on some level.

People still don't seem to understand the damage that gets done to children/people by small things, like parent emotional instability. It stunts children's emotional growth and attachment styles and sets them up for a life of failure or burn out.

Then all the other types of abuse lumped on top can be totally destructive.

 

[lucynpt]

I'm so bad at many things, I disappoint my parents and other people, and I used to think that it's my false.
But after a while i realise that the way I am right now is because of the way my parents raise me when I was small, I can't do anything to change that... But I can try to be a better bad person.

 

[ikadasui]

Probably would qualify as a miserable prick

 

[Peerless_Cucumber]

I'm the opposite. I feel like I'm taken advantage of because I always give and give and feel selfish for thinking about myself even just for once. I really don't want to be good anymore. However I always feel guilty for thoughts like that even though I don't act them out or plan to. I want to be useful. I want to be a good person but everyone takes advantage of that. No one actually cares about me yet I'm caring about everyone. I wish I could stop it and become an actual bad person. Because if I were I wouldn't feel the need to feel guilty about the smallest things. I wouldn't feel so bad for just thinking about myself for once. Then again I don't actually want to be bad because I want to be liked by everyone. It's exhausting.

 

[FuneralCry]

No, I don't, I see existence itself as the bad thing instead as after all it's the source of all harm and suffering. I was just unfortunate enough to be burdened with the ability to exist in such a hellish world, I'm not the problem but rather existence is.

 

[Sprite_Geist]

I certainly think that I am perceived as a "bad" individual by other people sometimes. If I behave a certain way it can (or will) be met with a negative response, and if I behave in the completely opposite way, it will be met with hostility as well. There are too many people trying to pull me in their own direction which leads me to be vilified by somebody else with an opposing goal.

I live in a culture that is mostly individualistic, so I understand that every person I meet will have different principles and values, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with this; however it is simultaneously still very, very frustrating because it also means that society as a whole becomes conflicted, contradictory and just overall fragmented; which is probably why I feel that it is almost impossible for me to exist without someone, somewhere treating me as though I am intentionally "bad" for not giving them a social response that they want. Despite all of this I do not deliberately try to be malicious to others.

 

[Griffith_NPD]

Everyone says I'm a good, kind, trustworthy person... But I don't believe them. I believe I'm a terrible person, for these people constantly lie to me, and don't truly trust me, they don't even talk to me, or initiate conversation... But besides those people, I still don't believe I'm a good person, I'm disgusting.
"I'm useless... less than useless. I'm Sick"

 

[Starry✧･ﾟDaze]

It's sad, reading all those replies.
I can relate, but at the same time there is one thing I've learned in life and always try to remember.

How other people treat you doesn't determine your worth. It's usually the very reflection of themselves.

And I know that this is indeed true, but I still struggle hard.
The shadows in my head are whispering to me that I'm worthless, bad, not good enough, not perfect enough and very deserving of other people's bad treatment. That's what I was taught early on when I was still a little kid and it's very hard to rewire these beliefs.

Self-hate is a strong enemy that constantly iniates fights with you.

 

[stilldreaming]

I keep having these thoughts that I am a bad person. These thoughts make me want to CTB whenever they come up and lately they have been really bad.

Intrusive thoughts are horrible. I've heard therapy(and possibly medication) should be able to help with that. Perhaps you might be able to give that a go? I've done therapy in the past, and am on medication to help with my anxiety, and it does help. Unfortunately not enough, but it's nice I suppose to have even a bit of relief.

 

[Meaningless_guy]

Same times you have to be the good guy and sometimes the bad one, depends of context and how are the people around you.

 

[Emma123]

If you think that you're a bad person then you probably aren't because most of the time bad people don't actually realize that they're bad, or worse, they don't want to admit it

 

[020x]

It's impossible for us to say, each individual sees you differently. Some people think that you're a good person, some despise you.

A "bad person" is seen differently by everyone because it doesn't mean the same thing to each person. You could do something that the majority agrees on to be a good thing, but some people will hate you because in their opinion it's bad.

If you believe you're a bad person, that's also your own opinion about yourself.

I guess the most accurate answer is what the majority thinks of you. As it's the judgement that most support that decides everything for us.

But just because what most think doesn't mean you're wrong. So after all, there's no real answer for this.

 

[blitz]

Yes. I know I am.

 

[ultrasharpy123456]

Oh... that's not even what I feel, it's just the straight up truth. If you knew me you'd realize that what happened to me I did to myself and that I deserved it.

 

[Pipsqueak!]

Yes, I feel like that all the time.

 

[brokeandbroken]

I keep having these thoughts that I am a bad person. These thoughts make me want to CTB whenever they come up and lately they have been really bad.

I am definitely not who I was even 18 months ago. I am not a better human being. I struggle I think i have done good things and tried to good things. But if the world you experience is truly what you put out... Then I must be a truly awful human being...