Discussion Do you ever get confused that people don't want you dead?

[AriasRed]

This is a genuine question. When I'm distressed, I often feel confused that people around me don't want me dead. I just feel like I was supposed to be hated by everyone else just like I hate myself. Yet, the things people say and do just contradicts that. Is this a thing that happens to others too?

 

[HopefulSleep]

I also don't understand it how people value the existence of me more than whether I feel pain or not, my mother yelled at me angrily when I tried to ctb in the past

 

[suicidalloser]

people want me dead, both online and irl. this is a fact. every single the forums, social platform out there, all banned, all pissed, all wishes. last time i used another forum was 2021. i am genuinely hated by all who spend enough time around.

 

[Goodgirlryeo101]

Yes sure, I guess I can understand why you might feel this way but completing ctb is a very personal and you should do it if you want it not because of anyone's opinion.

I wish you all the best OP in whatever decision you end up taking.

 

[AriasRed]

Yes sure, I guess I can understand why you might feel this way but completing ctb is a very personal and you should do it if you want it not because of anyone's opinion.

I wish you all the best OP in whatever decision you end up taking.

I didn't even say anything about why I have the desire to CBT in this thread.

 

[Goodgirlryeo101]

people want me dead, both online and irl. this is a fact. every single the forums, social platform out there, all banned, all pissed, all wishes. last time i sued another forum was 2021. i am genuinely hated by all who spend enough time around.

This seems like someone who was called sub Saharan baboon and a monkey by racists would say to say to hurt you OP because he is obviously hurt that people like that look at him and sees him as someone beneath them that they can comment like that mocking and making fun of his looks in the most deplorable way and that's why he would lash out and make you feel like that.

I mean if someone like that is making you to think that it's mostly not true and if even if that was the case there is no one who isn't going to die and tbh I will choose dying over living anyway anytime.People like him are so stupid and beyond pathetic because he is going to die too, like who isn't ?

I understand why he would be angry though because I mean he has people screaming and saying he looks like a boon, sub Saharan baboon and monkey on first sight - He wants to be regarded as good looking so bad and yet people he regards in high places still call him those terrible names. I understand why he would want to taunt others.

OP the point I'm trying to make is don't let anyone like the guy that I just mentioned get a reactions out of you because he is clearly a sadist and all the he could do was being a group (s) champion. He, me and you we are all going to die and we are here on borrowed time, as each day pass by your death is coming closer. He is just some background noise that all he has to do is insult me but im like homeboy you don't even know the day you are going to die but you are bragging on living longer huh?! So f?cking stupid.

 

[AriasRed]

This seems like someone who was called sub Saharan baboon and a monkey by racists would say to say to hurt you OP because he is obviously hurt that people like that look at him and sees him as someone beneath them that they can comment like that mocking and making fun of his looks in the most deplorable way and that's why he would lash out and make you feel like that.

I mean if someone like that is making you to think that it's mostly not true and if even if that was the case there is no one who isn't going to die and tbh I will choose dying over living anyway anytime.People like him are so stupid and beyond pathetic because he is going to die too, like who isn't ?

I understand why he would be angry though because I mean he has people screaming and saying he looks like a boon, sub Saharan baboon and monkey on first sight - He wants to be regarded as good looking so bad and yet people he regards in high places still call him those terrible names. I understand why he would want to taunt others.

OP the point I'm trying to make is don't let anyone like the guy that I just mentioned get a reactions out of you because he is clearly a sadist and all the he could do was being a group (s) champion. He, me and you we are all going to die and we are here on borrowed time, as each day pass by your death is coming closer. He is just some background noise that all he has to do is insult me but im like homeboy you don't even know the day you are going to die but you are bragging on living longer huh?! So f?cking stupid.

I'm too confused to reply properly to what you said, but thanks for the words, I guess?

 

[Goodgirlryeo101]

I didn't even say anything about why I have the desire to CBT in this thread.

You were talking a pro being hated etc so that's why I mentioned and also this is a suicide thread so I guess I assume that's the reason why you wanted to ctb.

All the best though on any decision that you end up making.

 

[suicidalloser]

I'm too confused to reply properly to what you said, but thanks for the words, I guess?

me too. i think they meant to quote instead?

 

[sulli]

what is happening ITT

 

[AriasRed]

me too. i think they meant to quote instead?

Maybe. Still, I said nothing about what I wanted to do in regards to CBT.

 

[suicidalloser]

Maybe. Still, I said nothing about what I wanted to do in regards to CBT.

sorry i can't comprehend any of this. probably because i'm in my lows now

 

[Aplev]

I don't think anyone wants you or anyone of us dead. I think everyone (including me) is too selfish to be actually thinking about your feelings. But, if you die, it probably will make them feel guilty, thinking about what they could have done to prevent it and whatnot, and they certainly don't want to feel disturbed by their thoughts, they want peace of mind (we all do). They probably also enjoy your company and such. So in other words, what I am trying to say is that everyone who is kind is probably being genuinely kind (whatever that means) but doing so to feel good towards themselves, and the thought that they hate you or despise you come from some occassions where they probably showed disgust or disagreement with something you said or did that directly involved them, but I am pretty sure it's always about them (be it love or hate), not about you.

In response to the question, it happened to me in the past but I don't think it happens anymore now.

 

[aGoodDayToDie]

My girlfriend often acts like she doesn't care if I'm around of not. But I know if I attempted to kill myself and failed, she'd be fucking angry with me. My dad is ill and barely has any time for me. But he gets angry when I talk about wanting to kill myself. No-one else really cares at all. I don't have anyone that gives me warmth and support. This life is fucking shit. I don't want to be here, I really fucking don't.

 

[AriasRed]

I don't think anyone wants you or anyone of us dead. I think everyone (including me) is too selfish to be actually thinking about your feelings. But, if you die, it probably will make them feel guilty, thinking about what they could have done to prevent it and whatnot, and they certainly don't want to feel disturbed by their thoughts, they want peace of mind (we all do). They probably also enjoy your company and such. So in other words, what I am trying to say is that everyone who is kind is probably being genuinely kind (whatever that means) but doing so to feel good towards themselves, and the thought that they hate you or despise you come from some occassions where they probably showed disgust or disagreement with something you said or did that directly involved them, but I am pretty sure it's always about them (be it love or hate), not about you.

In response to the question, it happened to me in the past but I don't think it happens anymore now.

So you see it as normal nowadays that people don't experience hatred towards you?

 

[Aplev]

So you see it as normal nowadays that people don't experience hatred towards you?

Yes. I mean, people might experience hatred towards me. But if they do, I feel certain it's always about them, not about me. What I mean to say is that I don't think they are thinking about how much they hate me because of who I am, but rather, because of something I did or said that they feel affects them. Maybe I made some joke that triggered a traumatic memory for them (even if it wasn't my intention), or I have something that they want. The same applies to me if I feel hatred towards someone. I don't hate the person themselves, I hate something about my situation that involves them in some way.

 

[HighFlight]

This is a genuine question. When I'm distressed, I often feel confused that people around me don't want me dead.

OP, I'm not sure what has happened in this thread and am having a hard following it. But I feel your question is valid.

Unfortunately, when distressed, some people tend to expect that everyone else feels the same way. I think it is just a normal, human response. Being aware of this, hopefully it will not come as surprise. Also, don't expect others to react or feel the same way - there may be many different reactions. It's what makes us all unique.

Wishing you all the best and hope that you can find some peace through your distress.

 

[Shaylla1998]

Yeah.
Based on my knowledge, the majority of people I know don't want me dead, apart from one or two online individuals.
I don't work, pay taxes or contribute to society in any way, I live with my parents and play videogames most of the day every day, and yet, most people don't want me dead or gone which I don't understand since I am practically useless I can't make my mind around it, what drives people (especially my parents) to support somebody who does close to nothing in their everyday life, if you can call it that.

Some time ago, when I tried to CTB, they got extremely angry at me, were very serious about the situation, and had absolutely no understanding of it. They know that if I'm gone, a lot of pressure is going to be lifted off their shoulders, however, they refuse to not care about me and I don't get it

 

[HighFlight]

They know that if I'm gone, a lot of pressure is going to be lifted off their shoulders, however, they refuse to not care about me and I don't get it

Good parents will care about you regardless of what you do. This doesn't negate your feelings. Just don't expect that they will feel relief when your gone.

 

[day]

I don't feel hated or confused that people don't want me to CTB however I wish people would let me make decisions without having to force their pro-life values on me.

I get not wanting to lose people you care about but to let someone suffer is just horrible.

 

[suicidalloser]

I don't feel hated or confused that people don't want me to CTB however I wish people would let me make decisions without having to force their pro-life values on me.

I get not wanting to lose people you care about but to let someone suffer is just horrible.

It's not about losing people, it's about the selfishness and forcing them to suffer for their own selfish reasons.
Everyone dies dammit, some sooner than others. get over it.

 

[LittleJem]

not everyone hates me - but it's hard for people/particularly family members to be in touch with this suicidal lunatic...

I have a rhyme about it…'I'm fated to be hated'.

I don't like myself for my madness either.

 

[jonghyun]

yeah, like people say they care and then act like they dont. Its a serious mindfucker

 

[ikadasui]

This is a genuine question. When I'm distressed, I often feel confused that people around me don't want me dead. I just feel like I was supposed to be hated by everyone else just like I hate myself. Yet, the things people say and do just contradicts that. Is this a thing that happens to others too?

I don't know. I know i'm trash but as long as someone finds me useful for a time I'll do my best.