Venting Distant memories. (Family death)

[Octavina]

I left my flat to go buy some vodka, it had rained a lot last night and as I walked up my drive I saw dozens of snails on the ground. One was on the road and I picked it up by it's shell gently to put on a brick ledge, I didn't want it to get stepped on or run over. As soon as I did that I had a flashback of my cousin in my garden holding snails as a child. I remember her being so mesmerised by them and unphased by their slime. That was my only memory I had of her. She lived in the USA, and died of a drug overdose a few years back now. It's not like we even knew each other well but I keep having weird memory or dissociative gaps where I'm back in that old memory and state.
i feel like nothing is real and so spaced out. (I'm also having intense ctb nightmares and it's pissing me off because I'm trying to get back into college and soon recover maybe

 

[Largeletters]

Even though you don't have many memories of her, I'm sorry for your loss, and I'm also sorry for what you're currently going through in life. I hope you're able to recover!

 

[FuneralCry]

I'm sorry you have to go through that, nightmares can be awful. It can be strange how certain events can trigger memories. I wish you the best in recovery.