Hello everyone,
Thank you for letting me on the forum.
I've been reading posts for around a week now, and it's left me with a mixture of sadness for many of you, but also what a wonderful resource this is. I think that one of the beautiful things seems to be an overall quest from posts for painless suicide methods, so I am grateful to be able to join this community as I search for my own.
I have many questions to ask, many threads to read, but hope that I will get to know some of you a little and possibly offer some support if I can.
I wanted to ask about something that I feel makes me seem a bad person, but at the same time is something I feel. Having had mental illness in many forms for about 30 years and seen my life destroyed, and the feelings of wanting to leave the world never go. I feel this is such a huge part of what defines me, but at the same time is something which many people cannot understand. I am never one to put others down, and mental illness is such a personal experience - what is depression in one, may be easy to deal with for someone else, it doesn't lessen ones experience of mental illness.
However, in the UK, we have this explosion of mental illness that seems to have occurred in celebrities and sportspeople, and having mental illness in some form is almost a cool thing to say you have. However, we seem to have celebrities saying they are depressed, pop into a private clinic and out they come "cured". Or a normally sad event happens in someones life, and somehow what used to be a normal life event, suddenly gets put under the heading of depression. Anxiety and PTSD are chucked around as if they are cool things to have, which you can click out of once your sad life event (whatever it is), stops. Everyone has bipolar seemingly, and everyone has had suicidal thoughts. Sometimes this constitutes one thought, once in their life, and this person is praised for speaking up a bout it.
The problem is, that negative emotions are now taken as mental illness, when I don't think they are. This feels like it massively dilutes my life which has been completely about never ending mental illness, and in a way cements those suicidal feelings even further, because my 30 years of failure and waste is now considered the same as somone having a bad day. That's clearly hyperbole, but it doesn't half make one feel even more hopeless. Not sure that makes sense, but I thought why not start with a rant :)
Thank you for letting me on the forum.
I've been reading posts for around a week now, and it's left me with a mixture of sadness for many of you, but also what a wonderful resource this is. I think that one of the beautiful things seems to be an overall quest from posts for painless suicide methods, so I am grateful to be able to join this community as I search for my own.
I have many questions to ask, many threads to read, but hope that I will get to know some of you a little and possibly offer some support if I can.
I wanted to ask about something that I feel makes me seem a bad person, but at the same time is something I feel. Having had mental illness in many forms for about 30 years and seen my life destroyed, and the feelings of wanting to leave the world never go. I feel this is such a huge part of what defines me, but at the same time is something which many people cannot understand. I am never one to put others down, and mental illness is such a personal experience - what is depression in one, may be easy to deal with for someone else, it doesn't lessen ones experience of mental illness.
However, in the UK, we have this explosion of mental illness that seems to have occurred in celebrities and sportspeople, and having mental illness in some form is almost a cool thing to say you have. However, we seem to have celebrities saying they are depressed, pop into a private clinic and out they come "cured". Or a normally sad event happens in someones life, and somehow what used to be a normal life event, suddenly gets put under the heading of depression. Anxiety and PTSD are chucked around as if they are cool things to have, which you can click out of once your sad life event (whatever it is), stops. Everyone has bipolar seemingly, and everyone has had suicidal thoughts. Sometimes this constitutes one thought, once in their life, and this person is praised for speaking up a bout it.
The problem is, that negative emotions are now taken as mental illness, when I don't think they are. This feels like it massively dilutes my life which has been completely about never ending mental illness, and in a way cements those suicidal feelings even further, because my 30 years of failure and waste is now considered the same as somone having a bad day. That's clearly hyperbole, but it doesn't half make one feel even more hopeless. Not sure that makes sense, but I thought why not start with a rant :)
