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ever so lonely

ever so lonely

terry joseph williams
Apr 17, 2022
282
so i was messaged with a reliable link yesterday just after registering here, a link that took me directly to sn, which i have purchased, was slightly worried there for a sec as had no confirmation email to speak of for a while, say like you would do with amazon or ebay which tends to be straight away, but it has been dispatched guys and gals, i just recieved it the now, the email to confirm it is en route, i want to say thanks for having me, and making me feel welcome here, i appreciate it, n would have been the preferred method of choice but as it is damn near nigh impossible to get hold of the shit sn will suffice, i must be alone in the fact that i wont be missed, most of my family are deceased mum included, so i wont leave any pain behind, i have also finalised everything that needs doing beforehand, always was organised if nothing else but a failure, anyways dont want to post no more woe is me or sob story bs malarkey, thanks for having me, the sn is en route at least, i have researched enough to know what i am doing in advance, plus it is coming from the us to uk, expected delivery date about a week it says give or take, thanking you for letting me join, and again thanks for having me, may everybody find the peace that they so seek here, in whichever way you choose, love and blessings, when it is time to go you just know, terry.
 
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D

deathisnear

Experienced
May 23, 2021
284
Wishing you a peaceful journey friend
 
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ever so lonely

ever so lonely

terry joseph williams
Apr 17, 2022
282
thanks brother, same to you aswell bro, hope you can find peace my man, i would be lying if i said i wasnt scared shitless but i anticipated that, it is the dreaded si kicking in but had it before with previous attempt and still did it, just wasnt as reliable as sn it was paracetamol so i know i can beat the si as i have done it already, what i am going to do is stock up on a bit of alcohol and i dont even drink as a general rule, i will use it to calm the nerves but not too much that it dulls my senses, like a fine balance, so down a bit of alcohol in the lead up and then that should kick the si to the curb i keep telling myself you aint got shit to live for it is for the best, like i say family is either deceased or we are estranged, so it makes sense, thanks for the kind words my bro, and please find peace however you can, i guess that applies to everybody on here, as none of us signed up because were in a good place in life, if anything being on here has opened my eyes to the suffering many of us have, suicide doesnt seem so bad when you consider how many years of suffering we have ahead
 
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locked*n*loaded

locked*n*loaded

Archangel
Apr 15, 2022
8,447
It seems your mind is made up. Still, you have a week to think things through, and be even more certain. Nothing wrong with that. If getting out of this place is right for you, then so be it. Only you can know that for sure. I hope all goes well for you and that you can find the peace you deserve, like we all deserve. Good luck in whatever you decide.
 
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L

lifeisbutadream

Warlock
Oct 4, 2018
797
Now the day is over
Night is drawing nigh
Shadows of the evening
Steal across the sky
 
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vegetables&sadness

vegetables&sadness

Member
Sep 22, 2022
10
If this is what you've set your heart on and you feel recovery isn't an option, then I wish you luck and I hope you find peace. Rest well buddy
 
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Mofreeko

Mofreeko

Arcanist
Apr 7, 2019
478
I admire your conviction. I wish you a peaceful exit from this existence.
 
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F

Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
11,672
I'm sorry life has brought you to this point. I wish you a peaceful journey and freedom from your suffering.
 
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ever so lonely

ever so lonely

terry joseph williams
Apr 17, 2022
282
thanks peoples, i want to say genuinely this is the best community i ever been a part of honestly, so supportive and nice for the most part, you never get that on facebook twitter or insta lol, nobody accusing you of being cowardly for contemplating suicide nobody labelling you selfish as you would get out there, because we understand it more, it has made me realise how the good suffer and how the arseholes get ahead in life, life truly isnt fair i think most of us knew this some time ago, thanks for your kind words man, honestly, it is a shame that the nice honest genuine people are destined to be shat on by life and the narcs out there and others who benefit by putting others down seem to excel, such a toxic shitshow of a society, thanks again man, wish you folks peace
 
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onlyanimalsaregood

onlyanimalsaregood

Unlovable 💔 Rest in peace CommitSudoku 🤍
Mar 11, 2022
1,329
thanks peoples, i want to say genuinely this is the best community i ever been a part of honestly, so supportive and nice for the most part, you never get that on facebook twitter or insta lol, nobody accusing you of being cowardly for contemplating suicide nobody labelling you selfish as you would get out there, because we understand it more, it has made me realise how the good suffer and how the arseholes get ahead in life, life truly isnt fair i think most of us knew this some time ago, thanks for your kind words man, honestly, it is a shame that the nice honest genuine people are destined to be shat on by life and the narcs out there and others who benefit by putting others down seem to excel, such a toxic shitshow of a society, thanks again man, wish you folks peace
I couldnt agree more
 
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wljourney

wljourney

Waiting for the bus
Apr 2, 2022
1,419
Congratulations Terry!
I hope everything arrives safely.

There is this very strange feeling of calm and peace many of us share when we get our packages.
It's a sensation of being back in charge. Knowing that you have a way out and are back in the driver seat is very comforting and many have reported that they are able to continue on for a few more weeks or even months. Just knowing that they have a choice. Regaining control.

It certainly has helped me a lot and I hope it gives you the same sense of calm and peace.

Wishing you well.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
42,521
N does sound like the ideal method and it's unfair how people are denied that option, but to me SN doesn't sound that bad in comparison to some of the other methods. I know that for many it can be a relief having the option of a way out of this life. I agree that suicide doesn't seem bad, in fact to me it's the opposite of bad. To die is the only way to achieve permanent peace and freedom from all suffering. Existence really is so horrifying to me and it's sad how so much pain exists in the world.
I wish you freedom.
 
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ever so lonely

ever so lonely

terry joseph williams
Apr 17, 2022
282
thank you lovely peoples, i feel there is an element to that guys and gals, taking back control of life, which seems as if it is a random series of events conspiring against us, most of which beyond our control, it is a way of saying fuck you life lol, i am reigning that shit in and taking back control, see how i feels when the package arrives lol, but feel adamant this is for the best , it is funny you say that hun because when i ordered it a calmness washed over me, like i havnt felt in ages like a serene feeling, normally i am worried over money, expenses or bills lol, so that was a relief, i just wish we could have met on here under better situations, the only thing that frightens me a tad it isnt fear more a wow factor is some describe sn as quickening your heart rate, that does frighten me, but somebody suggested to take propranolol i have that for anxiety and the gp keeps giving me it by the bucket load so wont run out any time soonies lol, thanks again lovely peoples, i have a week to go or thereabouts so we see, no pressure, but at this point i am just done, everybody detests my presence irl, my ex who i loved hates my guts, and wishes me dead, such a depressing place is life, (she blames me for the breakup maybe she correct i dunno), i hate how love can turn to hate on a dime, even if you did your best, they say it is a fine line, you realise there is no such thing as true love as we grew up to believe, thanks again tho and you peeps are so nice it is unreal, i wish we could be ceo of companies and be successful but this life shits on us from a great height, pretty depressing lol
true bro n would have been optimal as people describe is as literal slipping out of consciousness, but it is nigh on impossible to get ahold of without being potential scammed or taken advantage of in the process pretty depressing 🥺
oh shout out to my boy (assume its a boy or man lol), greenberg who provided the link, thanks my man
 
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spectraltease

spectraltease

When everything is lost everything is found
Sep 23, 2022
317
so i was messaged with a reliable link yesterday just after registering here, a link that took me directly to sn, which i have purchased, was slightly worried there for a sec as had no confirmation email to speak of for a while, say like you would do with amazon or ebay which tends to be straight away, but it has been dispatched guys and gals, i just recieved it the now, the email to confirm it is en route, i want to say thanks for having me, and making me feel welcome here, i appreciate it, n would have been the preferred method of choice but as it is damn near nigh impossible to get hold of the shit sn will suffice, i must be alone in the fact that i wont be missed, most of my family are deceased mum included, so i wont leave any pain behind, i have also finalised everything that needs doing beforehand, always was organised if nothing else but a failure, anyways dont want to post no more woe is me or sob story bs malarkey, thanks for having me, the sn is en route at least, i have researched enough to know what i am doing in advance, plus it is coming from the us to uk, expected delivery date about a week it says give or take, thanking you for letting me join, and again thanks for having me, may everybody find the peace that they so seek here, in whichever way you choose, love and blessings, when it is time to go you just know, terry.
I wish you the freedom you deserve brother. Good luck.
 
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I

IanUK

Member
Mar 25, 2021
77
so i was messaged with a reliable link yesterday just after registering here, a link that took me directly to sn, which i have purchased, was slightly worried there for a sec as had no confirmation email to speak of for a while, say like you would do with amazon or ebay which tends to be straight away, but it has been dispatched guys and gals, i just recieved it the now, the email to confirm it is en route, i want to say thanks for having me, and making me feel welcome here, i appreciate it, n would have been the preferred method of choice but as it is damn near nigh impossible to get hold of the shit sn will suffice, i must be alone in the fact that i wont be missed, most of my family are deceased mum included, so i wont leave any pain behind, i have also finalised everything that needs doing beforehand, always was organised if nothing else but a failure, anyways dont want to post no more woe is me or sob story bs malarkey, thanks for having me, the sn is en route at least, i have researched enough to know what i am doing in advance, plus it is coming from the us to uk, expected delivery date about a week it says give or take, thanking you for letting me join, and again thanks for having me, may everybody find the peace that they so seek here, in whichever way you choose, love and blessings, when it is time to go you just know, terry.
I really hope you get the outcome and that it's not painful. You are incredibly brave and being one of this group I absolutely get you. May you fly at last free if the agony.
 
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ever so lonely

ever so lonely

terry joseph williams
Apr 17, 2022
282
thank you bro i appreciate it my friend and i hope you too can find peace pal, what a shitshow we live in lol, peace and blessings to you my friend, and thank you for your kind words buds
 
I

IanUK

Member
Mar 25, 2021
77
thank you bro i appreciate my friend and i hope you too can find peace pal what a shitshow we live in lol, peace and blessings to you my friend and thank you for your kind words buds
Mate it's amazing how bleak life can be. I've been convinced most of my life that I was an accident of birth like I wasn't meant to be. I just can't understand my purpose. Everything I've done through life has been on automatic to do what society expected me to do but underlying looking back I've never done a thing because I wanted to do it. I've never engaged with any other human on anything but a superficial level. We all have our own stories as to what led us here but one thing I will say is that when I discovered this site I felt for the very first time that I wasn't unique!!!!
 
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L

Living_Hurts_so_Much

Specialist
Jul 30, 2020
317
Wish you peace and rest in your journey Terry.
 
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ever so lonely

ever so lonely

terry joseph williams
Apr 17, 2022
282
yup that there be the general idea.
 

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